Way to go - APOLOGY ALSO

Julie wrote:Actually I believe it does - read the 1st note again (from Madalot). She's referring directly to someone leaving and I don't think she meant Pugsy - that came later, but if I'm wrong, terrific, because I've been beating myself up all day for having started things (see the other thread I assumed was involved).

I did read it again. Maybe I'm wrong and if I am will apologize. However, I think she meant Pugsy. Just don't think she would be this upset about cpapguy leaving the forum.

Upset not because of who might leave, but why.

Madalot and Pugsy, agree with everything you said. And Pugsy, like so many others have said, you have been a huge help and support to me over the years. I’m not around much anymore, so you may not remember . . . just take my word for it!

For me, the forum has been the most help of any forum I’m a member of, but at the same time, the most aggravating and frustrating (to say the least) due to everything you’ve both mentioned. It was bad back when I started, and it’s even worse now. So as helpful as it is, I stopped participating for the most part.

Even though I definitely understand why, I do hope you change your mind, Pugsy, as I know the forum will be so much less without you. If you do go, I wish you much happiness, fun, and relaxing days!

Pam

I understand completely, Pugsy. I have been a member of this forum for a lot of years, as you can see from my profile. Over the years, there have been many people come and go who have driven a lot of people away with their ridiculous and terrible behaviour. I wouldn't want to hazard a guess at how many people have missed out on help because of people who are mean, rude, insensitive and just downright nasty! It is way too many, that I do know!
I rarely come anymore and certainly, rarely post because of this crap being directed at me and at others on the forum. It is inexcusable and, to me, unforgiveable, that a medical help forum gets like this. A person, even Pugsy, can only take so much of this nonsense!

Oh, Pugsy, I am so sorry to see you go. You have helped so many in what is a basically thankless task. You have always been a voice of reason and support in a group that is often unreasonable. We will all be diminished for your leaving.

Bon chance dear one.

Oh no! I haven't received results from my titration study and I'm awaiting that, my script, and finally my equipment. I was feeling confident that I would be able to take control of my therapy with the help of the generous folks here who possess so much knowledge... I am disheartened and somewhat fearful that I will now have to rely on a money grubbing DME that does not prioritize my health. SIGH

Pugsy wrote:I will be phasing out my participation on this forum because I simply cannot stomach the way things are now.
Yesterday 80% of the posts were shit slinging name calling and had nothing to do with helping anyone except the person trying to get the last shovelful of shit thrown.

Anyone want to take on the job of being the home for unwanted cpap stuff?
I am done with it.
I probably will have a final clearance thread and be done with the unwanted cpap stuff job.

Common sense and common courtesy have long sense been abandoned here.
It makes me very sad because it used to be a place that welcomed people and was a fun place to come to.
Just because a person can say anything they want to doesn't mean they necessarily should but if it is more important to be the last shit slinger here....go for it.

Thanks Pusgy! Goodbye cpaptalk, hello ApneaBoard. I believe it is moderated. It will be boring.

Goodbye cpaptalk, hello ApneaBoard. I believe it is moderated. It will be boring.

You won't find me over there. I don't think I would fit in well.

FoggyFroggy wrote: I am disheartened and somewhat fearful that I will now have to rely on a money grubbing DME that does not prioritize my health.

I am not the only person here who can help you sort through your first cpap use nights.
Lots of really good people here who know this stuff just as well as I do but if you run into serious trouble...I am not gone yet as I have some clean up work to do and I will stop by the forum on occasion in case someone is struggling particularly badly.

Plus the people that I have already started to help...I will finish those jobs as best I can.

I just need a vacation from all the stress right now. I am having trouble doing the very thing that I preach about doing when someone annoys someone....ignore them and for right now I can't ignore them like I used to.
I try to practice what I preach and right now it's just beyond my ability to do and stay sane and not come back with my own snarkiness and that's not someone I want to become. It's either that or I just jump on the snarky wagon and tell those that annoy me to just STFU.

I am going to phase out my participation but I am not going to just abruptly quit helping today..
So any of you guys who were actually doing the happy dance I am not gone yet so you might as well quit the happy dance.

And for anyone wondering....Madalot was definitely referring to me in this thread. I had told her (and a few others) yesterday how I was feeling.

"I am not the only person here who can help you sort through your first cpap use nights.
Lots of really good people here who know this stuff just as well as I do but if you run into serious trouble...I am not gone yet as I have some clean up work to do and I will stop by the forum on occasion in case someone is struggling particularly badly."


Thanks again a million times. Lots of good people here that will help of course. But your words were understandable and thorough enough to be especially helpful.

Hey Pugsy, I know exactly how you feel, I was seeing so much snarkiness on here I was beginning to do the exact same thing here at home . After I snapped at my granddaughter for nothing, she just looked at me like I had 2 heads... I knew it was rubbing off on us all. Time to take a rest again and take stock of what is most important to us. I know Den is fed up... his "gone fishin" sign says alot . Take a break, rest, relax and enjoy your family and the critters, things will shape up soon enough. This place will take care of itself for awhile, it always has after these things blow over. We've had our share of trolls and shit disturbers and things always go back to a nice quiet roar when they figure out we don't care anymore. Please don't go away permanently, even if you just check back once in awhile to say Hi..... some of the oldies but goodies will still be here and will appreciate the sentiment.
I have truly enjoyed our friendship and would certainly miss you... take care.
Cheers
Nan

"... well I am calling for supporting the people that come here for help (what the forum is for) and they are defending their "right" to crap on people which moderated or not moderated is NOT what this forum is for.[/quote]


+1

I don't come here very often because of the crap and I know it will only get worse. I really think this place just died. I have been helped here so much and I feel bad for the ones that will never know what a great place this once was. Rest in peace Cpaptalk.

garagelogician wrote:As an "outsider" and a newbie, I don't have a dog in this fight. I hardly even know what the fight is.

All I can offer is this: There are a lot of great people here who are extremely helpful...that much is obvious. It is also obvious that there are a lot of "sensitive" people, and a lot of "opinionated" people...and I get the sense that there has been a lot of other conflicts in the past. But you know what? None of that matters. We can all learn from people, new or experienced. And we can all help people, new to the forum or experienced. That is what we are here for. All this inside baseball and conflict crap does is scare newcomers away. If someone says something you don't agree with, respectfully reply and move on with life. If it doesn't dignify a response, ignore the trolls...it isn't worth the stress.

I hope everyone sticks around and acts like the grown-ups we are supposed to be.

My 2 cents.

Awesome insight and advice- thank you!

Pugsy wrote:It's not any one person's "fault"....it's a combination of things and people and general attitudes about what is "okay to say" no matter how much it might hurt someone.

It not so much what any one person says but most often the way it is said that makes me sit here and think to myself....."do they not even bother to read what they wrote and how shitty it sounds"
all in the name of "tough love" or the "cold hard facts of life" or whatever else excuse someone wants to use for being an asshole.

Keep it up folks and the only ones left will be the shit slingers because people who really need help will come here and promptly leave.

Whatever happened to "if you can't say something nice then don't say anything at all".

It's now common place to make fun of someone who cries and leaves the forum and tell them to "get thick skinned" like it is their fault.
Is that really what this forum has come down to? Pretty sad day.

The other thing besides common sense and common courtesy that is missing....compassion.
Compassion has been replaced by ridicule.

Pugsy......I just want to join in and offer condolences on your decision to leave this forum . You, above all are so knowledgeable,so willing to help, so understanding ...we will miss you terribly. I have even taken to quoting you when discussing my treatment with my sleep technician...and she is impressed. I cannot believe this unfortunate turn of events and am hopeful you may reconsider. For now...thank you SO much for all you have done to help me in this journey.

Pugsy wrote:

Goodbye cpaptalk, hello ApneaBoard. I believe it is moderated. It will be boring.

You won't find me over there. I don't think I would fit in well.

FoggyFroggy wrote: I am disheartened and somewhat fearful that I will now have to rely on a money grubbing DME that does not prioritize my health.

I am not the only person here who can help you sort through your first cpap use nights.
Lots of really good people here who know this stuff just as well as I do but if you run into serious trouble...I am not gone yet as I have some clean up work to do and I will stop by the forum on occasion in case someone is struggling particularly badly.

Plus the people that I have already started to help...I will finish those jobs as best I can.

I just need a vacation from all the stress right now. I am having trouble doing the very thing that I preach about doing when someone annoys someone....ignore them and for right now I can't ignore them like I used to.
I try to practice what I preach and right now it's just beyond my ability to do and stay sane and not come back with my own snarkiness and that's not someone I want to become. It's either that or I just jump on the snarky wagon and tell those that annoy me to just STFU.

I am going to phase out my participation but I am not going to just abruptly quit helping today..
So any of you guys who were actually doing the happy dance I am not gone yet so you might as well quit the happy dance.

And for anyone wondering....Madalot was definitely referring to me in this thread. I had told her (and a few others) yesterday how I was feeling.

Hi Pugsy,

I think I can speak for many of us in saying: those of us who love you, respect you, and have many thanks for your kindness, would like you to take care of yourself first by taking that vacation as soon as life allows; you know yourself well enough to realize what it is you need in order to make a decision about moving forward with participation in this forum. Your decision does not have to be final, a 'once-and-for-all' kind, unless you want or need it to be; sometimes, trying to decide that is too stressful in itself! For now, just try to get some distance and rest.

I agree with the others- you have helped so many people, including myself, and you have a vast amount of knowledge to offer newcomers and oldtimers, as well. Please know that there will always be a special place waiting for you here, in whatever capacity you wish to come back to.

Be Well and Be Happy