For sale: new not opened

Elle wrote:Palerider, If your "terseness" causes newbies to leave the forum I think it is time to revisit your delivery. This forum has been essential to me and many others and it pisses me off to see someone miss out on it because of you. .

your opinion is noted, thank you.

I will point out that there are multiple forums out there, and if someone doesn't like one, they're free to go to another where they like things better, instead of trying to make this forum all things for all people.

I'd also point out that someone who's been here for a year isn't really a newbie, and perhaps SHOULD have figured out what that big orange quote button is good for.

not that they were trying to get any help, just trying to rip people off with overpriced second hand stuff anyway.

I don't think you have a right to decide who measures up.

And this is the forum they chose. It is welcoming by most.

Why would anyone think that palerider is a smart guy? He could be. The likelihood is that he has a generous measure of self-discipline (and also smart). Smart people without it usually are not very impressive. I think that the guy is entertaining and people should be entertained. At least once in a while.

Clint89 and Elle: Why can’t you find all this entertaining? The halo came after me a little but he also did help immeasurably! He is just having “one of those days”. His eyes are a little crocked today.

Elle wrote:I don't think you have a right to decide who measures up.

And this is the forum they chose. It is welcoming by most.

I never said, nor implied, that I had any "right" to decide anything.

the forum is what the forum is, it's the wild west of cpap forums, it's got kind people, it's got smart people, it's got a few assholes, and some idiots, and it's got me.

if that person you're referring to doesn't like what's here, they're free to choose another one where they can be coddled.

or they can grow up and deal wit what there is where they happen to be.

I personally see no reason to coddle and baby someone who, after nearly a year here, can't figure out the 'quote' button, especially on a post where they're trying to shaft other members on the price of some used stuff.

maybe you think that "hey, I'll sell it to you for what the DME is selling it for, ain't that a great deal?" is just fine, and if someone here bites on that and pays 50% more than they should, oh, well... that's just tough beans for them....

but, I think that someone should point that out.

and so I did.

your friendly neighborhood consumer advocate. *bows*

Pesser wrote:The halo came after me a little but he also did help immeasurably!
... Additional Comments: Fear of devil with halo

just enough to put a little fear of halos in you!

I wasn't referring to the person on this forum who could very well be an asshole. I was talking about general attitude and treatment of newcomers. You have shamed people for asking stupid questions more than once..... but seems, according to your last post, that you are proud of your self appointed role so *shrug*. Carry on.

Elle wrote:, according to your last post, that you are proud of your self appointed role so *shrug*. Carry on.

I am proud of my self appointed roie here.... and that is PARTICIPANT.

i'm neither better, nor worse than anybody else here, it's a level playing field, there are no swaggering moderators with their billy clubs ready to pound anybody into oblivion for mentioning a place to get cpap supplies, or for asking a question in the wrong thread... or a host of other violations.

the only power that I have is that of words, you're free to ignore them, in fact, I suggest for your own piece of mind, you do so. I doubt there's any advice of mine that you'd be interested in partaking of anyway.

you're welcome to beat your drum of "let's homogenize this forum so it's just like every other forum", just as I'm free to say "heck with that, why do you want to ruin what's special here by making it the same pablum dribbling place as everywhere else?"

a selection is *good*, a variety is *good*.

I prefer interesting forums. I love all the different characters here. I just don't find rudeness that interesting. In fact rudeness and bullying on forums is what homogenizes them . It is quite common. Luckily it is not that common on this forum.

I've been a member of this forum since '05 predominately as a vendor. But, when I posted that I had SA and was going to need some help PaleRider and a lot of others voiced support and offered that help. Now I probably know the equipment and the industry a little bit better then someone fresh off the banana boat, but I still have a responsibility to research and read a certain amount before I just sign on and start blowing lunch.

In the past several weeks I've seen folks come on the forum and ask basic questions that a Google search would answer thoroughly. If, there are still questions or clarifications that need to be made after an attempt at researching it, I couldn't think of a better forum to come to than this one. When it comes to people peddling their overpriced throw offs, well I think the gloves should come off.

As to attitude, I remember when Accurate came out with firmware upgrades. Deltadave AKA Mobius, AKA etc. pegged me pretty hard with questions some of which I thought were snide and mean spirited. Firmware upgrades are not a high profit service, I made the pricing so it was affordable. I could of picked up my football and went home but I know my company and nobody runs me off easily. But here's the point; as much of an asshole as I may think he is, if I was up against a wall with a respiratory problem, I'd put up with a lot of his shit to hear his opinion.

So I guess the upshot is this;
If you come to this forum wanting the advice of some of the most knowledgeable people that deals with our condition, wear a helmet.

Not everyone who ventures on to a forum is internet savvy or even intelligent. Many are old and frightened. There is a lot of information here and it overwhelms some. I have been here many years and don't always find things by searching.

98% of the people here don't judge and just try to help newcomers to navigate the forum and their treatment.

I have never seen Pugsy be rude or condescending.

Elle wrote:I have never seen Pugsy be rude or condescending.

*crackle* Saint Pugsy, Saint Pugsy, your halo and wings are ready, please proceed to room 7.

btw, it does happen that someone pushes pugsy too far, it just doesn't happen very often.

We are all under a lot stress here, and having a sense of humor helps. I have been helped immeasurably here, and still am being helped, and try to be of help to others where I can.

But one marker for me when trying to hold the hands and help newcomers, of which we all once were is this:

When the newcomer is asked by members to list their equipment and to get and post a copy of their full-length sleep report, both pretty standard requests, and is told their rights by law to obtain the report and exactly how to request and get it and how to post it, does the sleep report and the equipment information show up within a reasonable time period thereafter in their posts, -OR- 1, 2, or 3 months later are they still asking the same questions without ever furnishing the prerequisite information? If the situation is the latter, I frankly skip over those threads, instead trying to have time to help those who are willing to get and furnish the information that only they can get.

I remember an industrial arts teacher I had in grade school who, when exasperated, had a favorite figurative expression: "You keep raising your hand, telling us you have a red string and asking us how long it is, but you won't measure it and you won't show it to us so we can measure it! Next!"

Respectfully,

Nate

palerider wrote:btw, it does happen that someone pushes pugsy too far, it just doesn't happen very often.

Yep....it does happen but not often. Most of the time I just make a mental note that so and so isn't someone whom I feel my personality will mesh with so I don't bother reading or responding to their questions.
There are a few people who I have put on my boxing gloves and gone into the boxing ring with. I don't do it very often because in all honesty it isn't worth my time or effort or getting my blood pressure up.

Elle wrote:Palerider, If your "terseness" causes newbies to leave the forum I think it is time to revisit your delivery. This forum has been essential to me and many others and it pisses me off to see someone miss out on it because of you.

We get it. You're a smart guy. No need to take people down to prove it.

+1 - I've been gone for a couple years because my CPAP therapy is going well, all thanks to this forum. I would hate for someone new to miss out on the support available here because of a less than warm greeting. Multiple threads have called you out for being rude. I came back looking for info on a new machine, and I was surprised to find your boorish contributions all over the forum.

Its a support forum after all, but your responses are often not particularly supportive.

Whoa! Hold on!

During the 45 years in which I practiced my career, I learned early on that it was in my self-interest, and in the interest of those I was helping, to separate personality styles from a person's knowledge and willingness to help others. Not every smart person is going to come on as kind and gentle and all tinkly and twittery as Dorothy's Fairy Godmother in the Wizard of Oz!

It's all well and good to learn from a gentle hand, but some of the most important and instructive principles and techniques I learned over the years were from smart, impatient, gruff and abrasive people who knew what they were talking about and were willing to share it.

palerider has been extremely helpful, patient and resourceful in helping me, and many others on cpaptalk, through many challenges and problems with sleep apnea and its equipment challenges, and I have come to appreciate and even be amused by his tart sense of humor.

If someone doesn't like palerider's style, then let them join the chorus in their own voice, applying the kinder, more gentle voice they think the questioner needs or would appreciate, directed towards the questioner, and lay off on the attacks against palerider and any others they judge to be rough-cut gems!

Respectfully,

Nate