OT: Time out and/or Duke it out thread

[palerider]

there's been something brought up under this OT post that i'd like to know more about. it concerns the subject of foe or ignore. could someone please give me some more detail about these?

specifically, if i do either of the above, is the person i'm putting on that list made aware of the fact? as in, is there anything at the bottom of my post that says specifically "joe blow is on my ignore list" or "jane doe is on my foe list"?

or is there any other notification to the person that i've put them on such a list?

only if you brag about it like avi does.

[Pugsy]

only if you brag about it like avi does.

Yeah...Plus I think that Avi thinks if he puts so and so on his foe list that they also can't read his posts and should be blocked from responding to what he says. It doesn't work the way but I think he thinks it works that way from some of the things he has said in the past.

[chunkyfrog]

I actually ASKED to be added to his foe list.

[grayghost4]

I actually ASKED to be added to his foe list.

That sound like a good Idea ...
also several other ... If only I could add myself to there lists.
I wish I could add "Guest" to my list ,,,, not worth reading anything by someone that does not have an idenity.

[palerider]

I actually ASKED to be added to his foe list.

he threatened to let you see how that feels.. how does it feel??

[chunkyfrog]

It was a relief.
I don't think he peeks.

[palerider]

It was a relief.
I don't think he peeks.

I told you, when he threatened, that it felt gooooood!

[Lucyhere]

May I suggest those of you who don't like Avi's posts (for whatever reason) start a new thread called, OT: Avi's Posts and Responses. Then people can choose to read it or not.

[Pugsy]

I don't have a problem with the bulk of what Avi posts. As long as it isn't potentially dangerous I won't say anything.
He's entitled to have his opinion and present it.
Right, wrong or indifferent ...he has the same rights as everyone here.

If someone disagrees with his opinion or thoughts...politely come in and state their own opinion and leave it like that.
Attack the message...not the messenger.

Now on a rare occasions Avi has opened himself up to personal attacks by his own personal attacks...then that changes the dynamics and people will respond when poked. I just hope they don't totally derail a helping thread when they do.
There are ways to respond to poking without destroying the integrity of the helping thread in the process.

[Goofproof]

May I suggest those of you who don't like Avi's posts (for whatever reason) start a new thread called, OT: Avi's Posts and Responses. Then people can choose to read it or not.

I thought that was what the buttons on the mouse was for, but I guess that would require some level of self control, a missing factor for many that live here. Jim

[Guest]

I wish I could add "Guest" to my list ,,,, not worth reading anything by someone that does not have an idenity.

You are gonna have to talk to Johnny about that...

End of story. Remember Johnny gets to decide...not any of you.

While you are at it be sure to ask what he thinks about unkowns like you who sell cpap equipment on his dime.

Some people seem to think after you choose some silly moniker it is ok to do whatever they want and to insult others for no reason except they don't like them. That to me is the epitome of sleep deprived unhappiness and contradicts what Pugsy just got thru talking about.

Remember if you don't like it here go to where the rules are the way you like them. See if they will let you sell cpap equipment as an unknown unlicensed "grayghost".

[SleepyEyes21]

(Pugsy wrote) Now on a rare occasions Avi has opened himself up to personal attacks by his own personal attacks...then that changes the dynamics and people will respond when poked.

And now this isn't considered bullying, Pugsy? Or should I say, bullying back? Ever heard of the term cyber-bullying?

(Pugsy wrote) If someone disagrees with his opinion or thoughts...politely come in and state their own opinion and leave it like that.
Attack the message...not the messenger.

But this contradicts what you just said about personal attacks. So which approach do you recommend we go with?

(Pugsy wrote) He's entitled to have his opinion and present it.
Right, wrong or indifferent ...he has the same rights as everyone here.

You (and others) keep saying that, yet when you criticize and/ or verbally attack another member in a personal manner, no one is upholding this 'right' we all have.

[nanwilson]

... Sleepy why is it that the only thing you can do is stir the pot with more crap... Halloween is over, no need for more stirring of the pot. You sound just like Trump, must find fault with everyone else, but think that you are perfect.

[robysue]

(Pugsy wrote) Now on a rare occasions Avi has opened himself up to personal attacks by his own personal attacks...then that changes the dynamics and people will respond when poked.

And now this isn't considered bullying, Pugsy? Or should I say, bullying back? Ever heard of the term cyber-bullying?

There is nothing "bullying" about accurately describing what happens when Avi (or anybody else) resorts to personally attacking another member of the forum.

If you choose to personally attack (or bully) people, some of those people are going to be happy to get right down in the gutter with you and start slinging the mud right back. And after a certain point, it doesn't really matter who started it or who kept it going by responding to a personal attack with another personal attack.

(Pugsy wrote) If someone disagrees with his opinion or thoughts...politely come in and state their own opinion and leave it like that.
Attack the message...not the messenger.

But this contradicts what you just said about personal attacks. So which approach do you recommend we go with?

Re-read what Pugsy said: She did NOT advocate responding to Poster X personally attacking you by writing a personal attack on Poster X. She said that it happens and that it's understandable that it happens.

In my opinion what Pugsy has been saying all along is this:

1) If you disagree with the substance of what Poster X says, write a post that expresses your opinion and explain why you think Poster X is wrong, but do it in polite language and do NOT personally attack (bully) Poster X about being wrong.

2) If Poster X responds by personally attacking (bullying) you, then you have a choice: Just ignore Poster X's attacks and attempts to bully you (which can be hard to do) OR if you feel like you just have to say something to Poster X that is NOT on the topic of the helping thread, move your response HERE so that if Poster X thinks you are attacking him/her, the flame war takes over THIS thread instead of the helping thread.

It takes two people to start a flame war. And sometimes the best way to handle cyberbullying is to just ignore it. The forum members are mostly grown up enough to figure out that if Poster X is continually posting personal attacks against others every time someone politely disagrees with the substance of Poster X's posts, then Poster X is the one with the problem.

(Pugsy wrote) He's entitled to have his opinion and present it.
Right, wrong or indifferent ...he has the same rights as everyone here.

You (and others) keep saying that, yet when you criticize and/ or verbally attack another member in a personal manner, no one is upholding this 'right' we all have.

Are you trying to imply that Pugsy goes around verbally attacking other members in a personal manner with enough frequency to be a problem? If so, then I beg to differ.

Or is this "You" the proverbial, nonspecific "you" meaning "any forum member who engages in this bad behavior"? In this case, the problem is that personal counterattacks are ineffective at bringing a genuine bully under control. The more you respond to a genuine bully with personal attacks like

• "You are an asshole"
  "You are an idiot"
  "You know NOTHING"
  "You are a horrible person"
  "You are *$(@% <fill in your favorite explicative expression>"

the more the genuine bully will respond and escalate the flame war.

[ChicagoGranny]