Scared/Upset Newbie

I've been lurking off and on since I found out I need to start using a c-pap.

Tomorrow night I go in to figure out what pressure I need, etc., and I'm really sad that it's come to this. I'm not even 40 yet. I dread the thought of what my husband will think when I go to bed with hose-nose. I try to blow off my feelings as immature, but I could cry every time I think of it.

Help!

How did you get used to the idea of being a c-pap user?

Hello Guest, and welcome! It took me a while to get used to the idea of being "hooked up", but the alternative was not pretty, lots of stroke, heart attack, etc in my family and I sure did not want to end up like my Mom who was very debilitated by strokes, ( severe cognitive impairment, loss of speech, incontinence,feeding tubes, the whole nine yards). It was not easy at first, but I can say I feel LOTS better, no brain fog, more energy, lower blood preside, etc. My hubby is very happy that I don't snore anymore, and even happier that I'm taking care of myself and will hopefully have lots of good years to share. It really has become no big deal,cuddle, chat , whatever, just put on the mask and turn on the machine when you sleep. You'll get lots of help here. Kathy

be positive, you will feel much better once you get "on the hose" - more energy for fun things

get the quietest machine you can (don't let them give you an older machine)

get some fun hose/mask covers from pad-a-cheek (personally, I rock with a leopard print hose cover )

my hubby loves my machine - I no longer snore, have more energy (and in the summer he likes me to sleep facing him so he gets a bit of cool breeze from the outtake air - we do not have AC)

don't be afraid to keep trying masks to find the one that is right for you - I am lucky to be able to use nasal pillows successfully (the Swift FX - it is like nothing at all on my face - and it rocks with the covers too!)

embrace the new you and don't sweat the machine stuff - or the husband stuff - he loves you and will understand this is what you need to be healthy, just like any other medical condition he would want you to be treated for - that's why he married you

Guest wrote:I've been lurking off and on since I found out I need to start using a c-pap.

Tomorrow night I go in to figure out what pressure I need, etc., and I'm really sad that it's come to this. I'm not even 40 yet. I dread the thought of what my husband will think when I go to bed with hose-nose. I try to blow off my feelings as immature, but I could cry every time I think of it.

Help!

How did you get used to the idea of being a c-pap user?

In my case, the results of my diagnostic sleep study scared me quite a bit, so I couldn't wait to get my hands on my own machine, knowing I could stop doing the damage to my body and mind that oxygen deprivation causes. So I never had any fear about using the machine.

Consider yourself LUCKY to be diagnosed at a young age. Think of all the good years you'll be able to enjoy, rather than sleepwalking through life, just trying to make it through the day without nodding off (or, heaven forbid, falling asleep at the wheel and hurting or killing yourself or an innocent person). If your husband loves you, he should appreciate that you're doing this to improve your health and enjoy a better life with him. Have you talked with him about it? If not, why not? It's best to have the full support of your spouse, family and friends. These are the people who care about you, so it should be a no-brainer that they encourage you to do what's best for you.

My advice: Do whatever you have to do to get yourself into a better frame of mind. Going into this with "dread" is a bad idea. A good attitude, a must-do/can-do one, will help you adjust to sleeping this way. Read the "Success Stories" thread near the top of the page for encouragement.

Few of us begin treatment and have an easy time of it right from the get-go. Even when we adjust to using the machine every night, there can be mask comfort issues, pressure settings that need a little tweaking, hose management to deal with, etc. But with perseverance and patience, successful therapy is attainable, potential serious health issues resulting from untreated apnea can be avoided, and it can make a world of difference in how you feel every day.

There's TONS of support and information here, so it's good you've found this forum before you even begin. Take advantage of all this place has to offer, and you'll do just fine. Welcome aboard.

I was actually relieved to have a name and diagnosis that offered relief. Before the diagnosis my old doctors were treating me for menopausal anxiety and depression. Duh.

My husband was the one who kept harping on me to get things checked out because he witnessed me stopping breathing so often. He is truck driver and OSA was heavily discussed on several truck driving radio stations.

Sit down and have a direct heart to heart talk with your husband about your concerns. I know it isn't very sexy but neither are the complications from untreated OSA.

It's hard to get the mind to look at this therapy in a different more positive light but it can be done. The mind is a powerful drug and once it works properly it does make the adjustment easier. This is all very scary at first but educate yourself and work on the positives and it will come together. I promise that this isn't nearly as horrible as it sounds at this point.

I can't type my usual lengthy pep talk due to wrist injury so I will let the others do that.

Regarding intimacy or sex... well we just plan a wee bit at night and any daytime play is unchanged except that I actually feel like participating now that I have some energy.

Actually, IMO it's all a mindset. Some people are ok with it, some take it very hard.

I decided to be ok with it. Afterall, I was more worried there was something more serious going on that was not treatable. When I heard I had sleep apnea, I breathed (pun intended) a sigh of relief.

My wife and I talked about it a lot and she is fine with the mask and machine. Afterall, better a husband with a mask and machine than no husband at all, which is the ultimate effect of sleep apnea.

Oh yes! The menopausal thing , turned out those hot flashes weren't, hot flashes, just untreated OSA, I'm sleeping MUCH better without those, and without the multiple bathroom trips . Guest, I bet your hubby will enjoy the new energetic , well rested you, FWIW, some people report that I'm less crabby . . CPAP may seem like a bad dream right now, I'll say I've come to even like mine, just for how good it makes me feel, can't imagine sleeping without it now. I didn't realize how bad I felt before CPAP, it was a steady improvement . It's good you have been diagnosed , youll save your health and give that hubby a new energetic woman

Thanks, everyone!

I guess I'll call myself "Resister" because that's what I've been.

Perhaps hubby doesn't realize how serious it is. After all, I don't snore anymore because I've been using the Puresleep, and he's too tired from working 6 days a week to hear when I stop breathing.

Yes, the whole thing is frightening--and expensive, with high-deductible insurance--but I am so glad I found a place to talk about it.

Again, thanks so much! Your kind/positive comments mean a great deal right now.

Resister, check out Janknitz s blog( look for link in her signature) about about DMEs and getting started. Do your homework and get a good machine; with a high deductible you may be better off purchasing online. good thing about this site is that it's always open, lots of help, just ask. You'll get through this and be just fine. . Talk with your hubby, im sure he will just want you to stay healthy. maybe it will help to think of it like putting on a pair of glasses, just another thing to help you live a better life, not invasive, not painful, not a big deal

Hey, you're not alone. I haven't hit 40 yet either. You may feel self-conscious about the whole equipment thing, but getting diagnosed and treated could actually be one of the best things that has ever happened to you. In this early scary stage, it may seem like a burden, but for many, the incredible difference in how we feel can make us never, ever, EVER want to sleep without the equipment again. Strange though it seems, you may find yourself getting quite attached to it!! You have probably heard about all the scary medical stuff that could happen if you don't get treatment. What you may not know (at least, I didn't) was that a ton of other less obvious symptoms are caused by apnea. Of course, of course, being tired, but hardly stops there. In fact, I was so tired for so long, and it had been coming on so gradually, that *I didn't even know I was tired*. So, what are other symptoms? Try: irritability ("why are you always so grouchy?"). Depression. Anxiety. Memory (been having more "senior moments" than seem reasonable? Can't remember details from a recent meeting?). Ability to focus/concentrate-- heck, ability to live in and enjoy the moment. Overeating. Procrastination-- 'cause you never have the energy to get around to stuff! It is *amazing* how many facets of our lives sleep affects.

I had a suite of symptoms and had chocked them all up to work stress, of which there was plenty--oddly, I never thought I was excessively tired! When this disease comes on slowly, it can be easy to not realize how much weight you're carrying around until-- BAM-- it's gone. Not necessarily overnight, although it happens that fast for a lucky few, but not infrequently, this can happen in a matter of weeks on CPAP. Many on this board have continued to see improvement after months. It feels like getting your life back! When you hadn't even realized, necessarily, how much had slipped away. Oh yeah, THIS is who I used to be! How could I have forgotten? Anyway... CPAP can be like a "make my life better" pill all at once, without side effects. It isn't just about avoiding the "stick" of future medical complications; there are often carrots to be had along the way. I hope you get a bundle.

I could cry every time I think of it.

Yup. Been there, done that. There was about a week that I was really trying to wrap my mind around it all, and a full day that I spent crying on and off. Go ahead and do it. It's a big life change, and it's okay to cry about it if you need to.

I can tell you that I had the most trouble with it all during the time between my diagnosis and getting my equipment. I don't know if I'd come to terms with it by the time I got my equipment, or that once I got my equipment it didn't seem so scary. But it definitely got easier.

I'm only 30, and still single, so it's definitely a crazy thing for me to be dealing with.

mayondair wrote:Resister, check out Janknitz s blog( look for link in her signature) about about DMEs and getting started. Do your homework and get a good machine; with a high deductible you may be better off purchasing online. good thing about this site is that it's always open, lots of help, just ask. You'll get through this and be just fine. . Talk with your hubby, im sure he will just want you to stay healthy. maybe it will help to think of it like putting on a pair of glasses, just another thing to help you live a better life, not invasive, not painful, not a big deal

Is it bad to have a used machine? I have a Fisher & Paykel HC 345 Humidified C-pap. Good grief, I don't even know what that means! It was given to me.

Thanks for the glasses analogy--that does make sense.

Interesting to see I am not the only one who hasn't hit 40 who is dealing with this. This is not how sleep apnea is portrayed, if that makes sense. I guess feeling like I received a "life sentence" is just scary--but I trust that y'all know what you're talking about, and that being on C-pap actually improves the quality of life. That is something to look forward to!

used machine isn't bad if it's a fully data capable machine... which I don't believe yours is.

Look at it this way: instead of a life sentence, think of it as being given a second life. Realistically, the sleep apnea could have killed you by now, however you caught it in time and were given the chance to save yourself. So, instead of a life sentence, you've been given a new lease on life.

Here, take a look at this person, who didn't get the same chance as all of us.

viewtopic/t63178/quotDeadliest-Catchquo ... Apnea.html