After years of being told that I stop breathing, gasp scarily and
snore like a freight train, I finally had a sleep study done in late
August which diagnosed "mild to moderate" apnea. I had to wait until
last week to get into the sleep center again to sleep with a CPAP so
that I could be titrated.
When I first arrived at the sleep center last week, they put a nasal
mask on, and I waved frantically at the nurse to take it off because
I could feel panic starting to set in (I also have a fairly severe
case of anxiety disorder, for which I take regular meds). They then
set me up with a nasal pillow mask, and allegedly I slept quite well
with the mask.
Yesterday, I picked up the prescribed equipment at the home medical
supply, and was given a Remstar Pro2CFlex machine w/heated humidifier
and a Mirage Swift nasal pillow mask system. My prescribed pressure
is 11, but there is a ramp feature which allows me to start out at 4
when I'm first going to bed.
I am so bitterly disappointed today.....I had the worst night's sleep
I've had in years. I finally practically threw the mask across the
room at 2:30 a.m.. Despite repeated adjustments, the pillows kept
slipping and blowing air into my eyes, and at several points in time
when I woke up, I felt as if I could not breathe at all and I went
into full blown panic mode, and I'm talking clinically....I've been in tears for most of the day, having waited for this for months. I really thought I'd wake up feeling better than I'd had in years, and when I called the resp. therapist
at the med supply, she said I "just needed to get used to it" and if
I wanted, I could come in and get one of the traditional nasal masks.
I'm hesitant to do that, since I reacted so strongly to the one
placed on my face for about two minutes at the sleep center.
Any ideas, anyone? Oh, my ears are ringing, my nose and eyes are
swollen, my throat is gravelly too....this while using the heated
humidifer component.
Thanks so much in advance for your help....I'm so embarassed.
Deb
Newbie really needs help and encouragement....
-
wlflady777
- Posts: 3
- Joined: Wed Oct 05, 2005 2:07 pm
-
Sleepless on LI
- Posts: 3997
- Joined: Mon May 30, 2005 6:46 pm
- Location: Long Island, New York
Deb,
First things first, I want to say hi and welcome you to your source of relief. This is where you will get help, I promise.
Now, try to take a few deep breaths and relax. It will all work out. You are not the first person to feel how you just described and you certainly won't be the last. We just have to get you to calm down and work through what it is that was making you so uncomfortable last night.
First of all, the Swift is a great interface. It's possible the pillow size you used may need to be changed and/or the straps readjusted. I always suggest, if you're having a problem with the Swift, to loosen everything and start from scratch. First you need to know which size nasal pillows will work best and be comfortable for you to wear. You can stand in front of a mirror and place them up to your nares and measure. Sometimes too large can create discomfort, but you need it large enough to seal the openings. Also, if you develop any soreness, you can use either AYR Gel or KY Jelly to lubricate the nares to ease the period of soreness while adjusting to wearing the interface. Most people need to do that when they start using this type of mask.
Next put the Swift on and tighten the back strap first, not overly tight but just enough to feel comfortably in place/secure. Then use the top adjustment to pull the pillows upward until it feels like they will stay in place, just not overly tight to hurt your nares. In this way, you will be adjusting the side straps not to cut into the top of your ears. When done correctly, they should be about halfway between your ears and the outer corners of your eyes.
Now, you have a ramp set at 4, which is low. I don't think you can go any lower. I know from personal experience that it takes some getting used to because it can make you feel like you're not getting any air at all. Have you tried not using the ramp? But if you need to, realize this takes time to get used to. Everything about using the equipment takes time. You are not alone in that. And most first nights make you so excitable and anxious that you have trouble sleeping because you have all this adrenaline running rampant in you. Do you have the Cflex option turned on? It helps with your exhalation. Perhaps you need to see if it's set for Cflex; and, if not, put it on.
Try to remember it was your first night. It will get better. We all go through this period of adjustment. I truly feel if you get the mask to fit you better and you feel more comfortable in it, you will be able to tolerate the machine better. Like everyone here always says, it's not the machine that's the problem, it's the mask. Perhaps try wearing it for awhile before you go to bed tonight just so you can get used to how it feels. That way you won't feel so alien to it when it's time to go to sleep.
I know you feel like you won't get past this, but you will. Everybody does, but in their own time. We are all on your side and will help you through whatever you need. We've all been there, done that before. There is very little you can post that probably hasn't been addressed before, so don't worry about anything you want to talk about.
I hope tonight goes better for you. But know that each night that passes, it will get a little easier; and, before you know it, you'll be a pro giving advice to other newcomers on this site. It happened to me
First things first, I want to say hi and welcome you to your source of relief. This is where you will get help, I promise.
Now, try to take a few deep breaths and relax. It will all work out. You are not the first person to feel how you just described and you certainly won't be the last. We just have to get you to calm down and work through what it is that was making you so uncomfortable last night.
First of all, the Swift is a great interface. It's possible the pillow size you used may need to be changed and/or the straps readjusted. I always suggest, if you're having a problem with the Swift, to loosen everything and start from scratch. First you need to know which size nasal pillows will work best and be comfortable for you to wear. You can stand in front of a mirror and place them up to your nares and measure. Sometimes too large can create discomfort, but you need it large enough to seal the openings. Also, if you develop any soreness, you can use either AYR Gel or KY Jelly to lubricate the nares to ease the period of soreness while adjusting to wearing the interface. Most people need to do that when they start using this type of mask.
Next put the Swift on and tighten the back strap first, not overly tight but just enough to feel comfortably in place/secure. Then use the top adjustment to pull the pillows upward until it feels like they will stay in place, just not overly tight to hurt your nares. In this way, you will be adjusting the side straps not to cut into the top of your ears. When done correctly, they should be about halfway between your ears and the outer corners of your eyes.
Now, you have a ramp set at 4, which is low. I don't think you can go any lower. I know from personal experience that it takes some getting used to because it can make you feel like you're not getting any air at all. Have you tried not using the ramp? But if you need to, realize this takes time to get used to. Everything about using the equipment takes time. You are not alone in that. And most first nights make you so excitable and anxious that you have trouble sleeping because you have all this adrenaline running rampant in you. Do you have the Cflex option turned on? It helps with your exhalation. Perhaps you need to see if it's set for Cflex; and, if not, put it on.
Try to remember it was your first night. It will get better. We all go through this period of adjustment. I truly feel if you get the mask to fit you better and you feel more comfortable in it, you will be able to tolerate the machine better. Like everyone here always says, it's not the machine that's the problem, it's the mask. Perhaps try wearing it for awhile before you go to bed tonight just so you can get used to how it feels. That way you won't feel so alien to it when it's time to go to sleep.
I know you feel like you won't get past this, but you will. Everybody does, but in their own time. We are all on your side and will help you through whatever you need. We've all been there, done that before. There is very little you can post that probably hasn't been addressed before, so don't worry about anything you want to talk about.
I hope tonight goes better for you. But know that each night that passes, it will get a little easier; and, before you know it, you'll be a pro giving advice to other newcomers on this site. It happened to me
Last edited by Sleepless on LI on Wed Oct 05, 2005 2:30 pm, edited 1 time in total.
L o R i
Hi, Deb and welcome to cpaptalk forum. Take a deep breath, relax and realize you are definitely NOT alone in what you went through the first night. Take heart in that it DOES get better, and fairly quickly. k??
We have a ton of very knowledgeable folks here and this is a great place to get information and to vent. Just relax a bit and browse the board. There's going to be answers to questions that you haven't even gotten around to thinking about asking yet that will help bunches.
As for your first night being a disappointment, that happens quite a bit. Taking the mask off, experiencing really annoying leaks, feeling trapped and panicy...it happens. Some folks find that if they put on the mask and turn on the CPAP quite a bit before going to sleep and wearing it while reading or watching tv or just sitting around, this helps you relax and adjust to the mask plus it gives you a chance to adjust the mask for leaks before turning off the lights and fighting it while trying to go to sleep. If you feel the need to take it off for a bit, go right ahead and take it off. Give yourself a chance to "make friends" with it, so to speak.
Also, it may be a while before you are able to sleep throughout the entire night with the mask on and hooked up. Again, it's ok. Use it as much as you can, but when you get to the point where you're ready to stop using it for the night (and only for the one night!) then take it off.
Hopefully it won't be too long before you're looking at the whole setup as a friend that's helping keep you alive and alert and healthy instead of as a medical device you have to strap on every night that blows air into your body. Attitude sure does help in this situation...at least for me.
With this said, I'm sure there are more folks here who can give better advice than me. Hang in there and keep asking questions here!!! That's about the #1 thing you can do.
This therapy WORKS!!!
We have a ton of very knowledgeable folks here and this is a great place to get information and to vent. Just relax a bit and browse the board. There's going to be answers to questions that you haven't even gotten around to thinking about asking yet that will help bunches.
As for your first night being a disappointment, that happens quite a bit. Taking the mask off, experiencing really annoying leaks, feeling trapped and panicy...it happens. Some folks find that if they put on the mask and turn on the CPAP quite a bit before going to sleep and wearing it while reading or watching tv or just sitting around, this helps you relax and adjust to the mask plus it gives you a chance to adjust the mask for leaks before turning off the lights and fighting it while trying to go to sleep. If you feel the need to take it off for a bit, go right ahead and take it off. Give yourself a chance to "make friends" with it, so to speak.
Also, it may be a while before you are able to sleep throughout the entire night with the mask on and hooked up. Again, it's ok. Use it as much as you can, but when you get to the point where you're ready to stop using it for the night (and only for the one night!) then take it off.
Hopefully it won't be too long before you're looking at the whole setup as a friend that's helping keep you alive and alert and healthy instead of as a medical device you have to strap on every night that blows air into your body. Attitude sure does help in this situation...at least for me.
With this said, I'm sure there are more folks here who can give better advice than me. Hang in there and keep asking questions here!!! That's about the #1 thing you can do.
This therapy WORKS!!!
_________________
| Mask: Ultra Mirage™ Full Face CPAP Mask with Headgear |
| Additional Comments: APAP, 8-14 cm H2O. |
This therapy WORKS!!!
Do you take anything to calm you down? If you do, take it!
If not, get something to calm you down. Relaxation tapes, a purring cat, St. John's Wart, small glass of wine before bed, glass of warm milk, drugs etc.
Make going to sleep a happy time. Put your machine under the bed if you can. That's where mine is and I can't hear a thing. Adjust your straps on the head gear, maybe try a different size of nasal pillow. Take a nap with your new found friend. Give it a name. Prop yourself up with a couple of pillows lay back and relax. If you can nap for a few minutes with it you will gradually get the hang of it. If your DME will let you, try a different mask. The one that I use is small and not doesn't make me feel like I am being swallowed alive.
Just don't give up and don't get excited. It'll all work out in time.
For the dry throat, I did use the spray Snore No More, (I think that was it)
It moistens the throat. It has mint oils, flavor is good, doesn't smell bad.
hmm. Might be other uses for it. I will do research!!
It's only been one night. Have patience. If you can't sleep, read this message board. There's enough info and humor here to last a while.
If not, get something to calm you down. Relaxation tapes, a purring cat, St. John's Wart, small glass of wine before bed, glass of warm milk, drugs etc.
Make going to sleep a happy time. Put your machine under the bed if you can. That's where mine is and I can't hear a thing. Adjust your straps on the head gear, maybe try a different size of nasal pillow. Take a nap with your new found friend. Give it a name. Prop yourself up with a couple of pillows lay back and relax. If you can nap for a few minutes with it you will gradually get the hang of it. If your DME will let you, try a different mask. The one that I use is small and not doesn't make me feel like I am being swallowed alive.
Just don't give up and don't get excited. It'll all work out in time.
For the dry throat, I did use the spray Snore No More, (I think that was it)
It moistens the throat. It has mint oils, flavor is good, doesn't smell bad.
hmm. Might be other uses for it. I will do research!!
It's only been one night. Have patience. If you can't sleep, read this message board. There's enough info and humor here to last a while.
WooHoo! Life is good.
I get a little cocky when I am "NO LONGER TIRED"
I get a little cocky when I am "NO LONGER TIRED"
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Jan in Colo.
- Posts: 128
- Joined: Tue Sep 13, 2005 11:54 pm
- Location: Colorado
One of the things my respiratory therapist told me to do (and this was about the only good advice she gave me, lol) was to come home, sit down, and just put the mask on, turn the CPAP machine on and just read, watch TV, do needlework, whatever. Try to condition yourself to it. Try short periods of time first, then lengthen the time bit by bit. Don't try to do it all at night when you are tired and cranky from fatigue anyway.
I was lucky enough to just LOVE my Cpap machine right off the bat (well, that was luck and a fair amount of determination to make this work)....but I still did take her advice the first afternoon. I really think she was "on to something" there, it was good advice. It might take you a little while longer to get used to it, but be sure to stick with it.
Best of luck to you.....but be sure to throw in some of that determination. You NEED this therapy and you NEED to have this work for you. You will feel so much better after awhile. I didn't have a miraculous "cure" after one night either. Really took me about 4-6 weeks of 100% compliance to really feel a huge difference in my life. And I still have some "dud" days periodically. But that silly machine really, really does work.
Jan in Colo.
I was lucky enough to just LOVE my Cpap machine right off the bat (well, that was luck and a fair amount of determination to make this work)....but I still did take her advice the first afternoon. I really think she was "on to something" there, it was good advice. It might take you a little while longer to get used to it, but be sure to stick with it.
Best of luck to you.....but be sure to throw in some of that determination. You NEED this therapy and you NEED to have this work for you. You will feel so much better after awhile. I didn't have a miraculous "cure" after one night either. Really took me about 4-6 weeks of 100% compliance to really feel a huge difference in my life. And I still have some "dud" days periodically. But that silly machine really, really does work.
Jan in Colo.
I agree with TXKajun with watching TV with the mask on before I try and go to sleep. Although I can't HEAR the TV over the machine without turning it up and pissing off my husband.....I've learned to read lips really well. I really enjoy watching Trama -Life in the ER and The Critical Hour on Discovery Health channel. THey are on around 10-11 at night when I go to bed. It makes me realize I've got it good compared to what some others are going through. Guess I'd rather be going to sleep with a mask on my face instead of a bullet in my brain or thrashed through the window of a car.
I also have GAD (General Anxiety Disorder) and I am prescribed Lexapro, Buspar and Xanax. Quite a little cocktail I've got going on there, huh. Though, I no longer take the Xanax unless I absolutely have to, since it can worsten the apnea.
I understand your frustration with the mask and sympathize. My husband wakes me often and tells me to put my mask back on. I usually have to go on a treasure hunt to find it. Somehow, I manage to unattached to hose and mask separately from the machine and throw them somewhere entirely separately away from each other in the room all while I am sleeping. Personally, I think it's the ghost that's living in my house, but then again that explains my username.
I've been going through this for 9 months now and still consider myself a newbie and still hate the fact that I must live with this. But that's why I visit the forum every now and again......Too see, just as you are, that I am not as alone as I sometimes feel.
Good luck to all of us every night!
I also have GAD (General Anxiety Disorder) and I am prescribed Lexapro, Buspar and Xanax. Quite a little cocktail I've got going on there, huh. Though, I no longer take the Xanax unless I absolutely have to, since it can worsten the apnea.
I understand your frustration with the mask and sympathize. My husband wakes me often and tells me to put my mask back on. I usually have to go on a treasure hunt to find it. Somehow, I manage to unattached to hose and mask separately from the machine and throw them somewhere entirely separately away from each other in the room all while I am sleeping. Personally, I think it's the ghost that's living in my house, but then again that explains my username.
I've been going through this for 9 months now and still consider myself a newbie and still hate the fact that I must live with this. But that's why I visit the forum every now and again......Too see, just as you are, that I am not as alone as I sometimes feel.
Good luck to all of us every night!
Hi and Welcome!!
I also am new to this stuff. I starting using a BiFlex machine last week and last night finally after 6 nights of struggle slept the entire night with my full face mask.. I started the first couple nights with a medium mask and then switched to the small mask which seemed to have helped.
Don't give up.. Go back night after night with a goal to increase your time.
This site helped me so much and without it I would have given up after just the first night.
Fight the good fight and keep on trucking!!!
I also am new to this stuff. I starting using a BiFlex machine last week and last night finally after 6 nights of struggle slept the entire night with my full face mask.. I started the first couple nights with a medium mask and then switched to the small mask which seemed to have helped.
Don't give up.. Go back night after night with a goal to increase your time.
This site helped me so much and without it I would have given up after just the first night.
Fight the good fight and keep on trucking!!!
_________________
| Mask | ||||
 | ||||
| Additional Comments: Newbe | ||||
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Jan in Colo.
- Posts: 128
- Joined: Tue Sep 13, 2005 11:54 pm
- Location: Colorado
CrazyOne.....
Just a heads up...the pulmonary sleep specialist was pretty adament to my primary care doc that Lexapro is not real great for sleep apnea either...well, actually for restless leg syndrome, but in my twisted understanding of things it seems that if it is not good for RLS, it may not be good for sleepwalkers either!
Just a thought...
Jan in Colo.
Just a heads up...the pulmonary sleep specialist was pretty adament to my primary care doc that Lexapro is not real great for sleep apnea either...well, actually for restless leg syndrome, but in my twisted understanding of things it seems that if it is not good for RLS, it may not be good for sleepwalkers either!
Just a thought...
Jan in Colo.
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wlflady777
- Posts: 3
- Joined: Wed Oct 05, 2005 2:07 pm
Thank you all so very much for the warm welcomes, great advice, and understanding cyber hands on my shoulders.
Because I had such an awful panic response last night, I have been avoiding my bedroom all night....still sitting out in the living room in my work clothes, I am~ I'm sorely tempted to sleep in another room so that I know that I will sleep, but I won't.
I just pray that I can get used to the mask....I've abhorred anything on my head all of my life; I used to rip the hat off my head as a kid when I got out of sight of my parent's house - lol.
My poor dogs, who usually sleep on the floor and in bed with me, took one look at me and my scary hosehead last night and found other places to sleep!
I definitely can't spend most of the night crying again, because it just makes my nasal passages all the more swollen against the assault of the air.
Thanks again....you guys are the best!
Deb
Because I had such an awful panic response last night, I have been avoiding my bedroom all night....still sitting out in the living room in my work clothes, I am~ I'm sorely tempted to sleep in another room so that I know that I will sleep, but I won't.
I just pray that I can get used to the mask....I've abhorred anything on my head all of my life; I used to rip the hat off my head as a kid when I got out of sight of my parent's house - lol.
My poor dogs, who usually sleep on the floor and in bed with me, took one look at me and my scary hosehead last night and found other places to sleep!
I definitely can't spend most of the night crying again, because it just makes my nasal passages all the more swollen against the assault of the air.
Thanks again....you guys are the best!
Deb
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Jan in Colo.
- Posts: 128
- Joined: Tue Sep 13, 2005 11:54 pm
- Location: Colorado
When I got my mask, I did a little show for my dogs. I let them sniff the thing, I held it in different positions so they were familiar with the look of it and then I had them watch me while I put it on and pulled it off several times. I put it on and turned the machine on so they would hear the air flow. They are fine with it now.
Jan in Colo.
Jan in Colo.
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Sleepless on LI
- Posts: 3997
- Joined: Mon May 30, 2005 6:46 pm
- Location: Long Island, New York
Deb,
This is IN NO WAY meant to be said like I think it's so easy or without understanding that you have issues that stem from way back, but you have got to really try to change the way you're thinking. When I just read your reply, it is so negative, like you just don't expect things to work or get better. I am a true believe in karma and if you think positive thoughts, positive things will happen. If you think negatively, you will have negative results.
Try to hear what everyone is telling you. I can only imagine how you feel right now because it seems to be a bit beyond what the average person feels when they start. But that's okay. You have so many people here to back you up and support you that you can't fail. Just keep telling yourself how grateful you are that they diagnosed you with something treatable; and not only is it treatable, but it makes your life so much better than it was before once you get past the kinks in the beginning.
Like I said before, you are not alone. SO many people have trouble in the beginning, but attitude is such a tremendous part of succeeding with this. You are being given an opportunity, thank the heavens, to make your life so much better and to vastly improve the way you feel, not to mention improve your health in such a drastic way. Try to take a deep breath, or many, revamp your way of thinking to realize this won't be as bad as you think it's going to be and try to be strong. You will be so glad in the end when you see it starting to work. It's wonderful, honestly. Easy? No. Wonderful? Yes.
I hope you didn't take this post the wrong way. I hear where you're coming from and I know it's not easy for you. But let us be here to help you. We have all been through what you're going through right now and really know how to guide you down the right path. I wish you nothing but success and easier times ahead. Just try to put a smile on your face and really try not to let this get to you as much as it seems to have. You WILL succeed!!!!
This is IN NO WAY meant to be said like I think it's so easy or without understanding that you have issues that stem from way back, but you have got to really try to change the way you're thinking. When I just read your reply, it is so negative, like you just don't expect things to work or get better. I am a true believe in karma and if you think positive thoughts, positive things will happen. If you think negatively, you will have negative results.
Try to hear what everyone is telling you. I can only imagine how you feel right now because it seems to be a bit beyond what the average person feels when they start. But that's okay. You have so many people here to back you up and support you that you can't fail. Just keep telling yourself how grateful you are that they diagnosed you with something treatable; and not only is it treatable, but it makes your life so much better than it was before once you get past the kinks in the beginning.
Like I said before, you are not alone. SO many people have trouble in the beginning, but attitude is such a tremendous part of succeeding with this. You are being given an opportunity, thank the heavens, to make your life so much better and to vastly improve the way you feel, not to mention improve your health in such a drastic way. Try to take a deep breath, or many, revamp your way of thinking to realize this won't be as bad as you think it's going to be and try to be strong. You will be so glad in the end when you see it starting to work. It's wonderful, honestly. Easy? No. Wonderful? Yes.
I hope you didn't take this post the wrong way. I hear where you're coming from and I know it's not easy for you. But let us be here to help you. We have all been through what you're going through right now and really know how to guide you down the right path. I wish you nothing but success and easier times ahead. Just try to put a smile on your face and really try not to let this get to you as much as it seems to have. You WILL succeed!!!!
L o R i
Deb,
There are other nasal pillows masks around - the Breeze and the Aura.
People differ in the way they react to masks.
For me, the Swift was horrid, and the Breeze a life saver.
For Lori, the Breeze was horrid, and the Swift a life saver.
I can understand you panic - if necessary, get your RT to let you start out at lower pressure till you get used to it, and then raise it gradually. Starting out with the pressuer too low is better than total noncompliace.
Good luck, and don't panic - it's frightening, it takes time and patience, but it works.
O.
There are other nasal pillows masks around - the Breeze and the Aura.
People differ in the way they react to masks.
For me, the Swift was horrid, and the Breeze a life saver.
For Lori, the Breeze was horrid, and the Swift a life saver.
I can understand you panic - if necessary, get your RT to let you start out at lower pressure till you get used to it, and then raise it gradually. Starting out with the pressuer too low is better than total noncompliace.
Good luck, and don't panic - it's frightening, it takes time and patience, but it works.
O.
_________________
| Mask: AirFit™ P10 Nasal Pillow CPAP Mask with Headgear |
| Additional Comments: Machine: Resmed AirSense10 for Her with Climateline heated hose ; alternating masks. |
Deb,
What can I add except to say what a fantastic lot of effort the folks posting above have put into conveying a sense of comfort to you.
But I will add these comments ...
This whole xPAP business is daunting, the sleep studies are a great source of anxiety and concern.
My 1st night I could scarcely breathe (anxiety) - the attending clinic person did manage to get a nasal mask on me but only after she also got me a nasal spray to clear what had become almost a complete nasal blockage
My 1st night wasn't at all nice as sleep goes, had a sore head the next day, felt whoozy
******************************************
Now, I have *no* fear of the masks & even when stuffed up in the nose can slap the mask on and just breath slowly (even if a struggle) until I fall asleep (rarely use ramp now - straight CPAP at 14cms). I fall asleep with the *utmost* confidence that if I wake I will be so nicely surprise that all the stuffiness went away - don't know where to, but it is so predictable that *nothing* frightens me any more.
The only complications I have discovered is that I am an inherent mouth breather & so I now use a f/f mask which isn't as tender as an Activa nasal mask .
One other thing - I will *never* get angry with my xPAP machine or the masks as I know they are there to help me & if I did misdirect my anger towards them I am missing the point of why they are there & how much they want to help. I am now more afraid of missing a night of xPAP that I am of a bad night of leaks, squeaks & aerophagia. This boy has learned to burp on demand to clear much of the misdirected air
What I am really saying is, this situation can be awful or another source of fun & many of the folk here sure know how to wrangle the fun out of the the torture
Cheers & good luck & we are here to support you
DSM
What can I add except to say what a fantastic lot of effort the folks posting above have put into conveying a sense of comfort to you.
But I will add these comments ...
This whole xPAP business is daunting, the sleep studies are a great source of anxiety and concern.
My 1st night I could scarcely breathe (anxiety) - the attending clinic person did manage to get a nasal mask on me but only after she also got me a nasal spray to clear what had become almost a complete nasal blockage
My 1st night wasn't at all nice as sleep goes, had a sore head the next day, felt whoozy
******************************************
Now, I have *no* fear of the masks & even when stuffed up in the nose can slap the mask on and just breath slowly (even if a struggle) until I fall asleep (rarely use ramp now - straight CPAP at 14cms). I fall asleep with the *utmost* confidence that if I wake I will be so nicely surprise that all the stuffiness went away - don't know where to, but it is so predictable that *nothing* frightens me any more.
The only complications I have discovered is that I am an inherent mouth breather & so I now use a f/f mask which isn't as tender as an Activa nasal mask .
One other thing - I will *never* get angry with my xPAP machine or the masks as I know they are there to help me & if I did misdirect my anger towards them I am missing the point of why they are there & how much they want to help. I am now more afraid of missing a night of xPAP that I am of a bad night of leaks, squeaks & aerophagia. This boy has learned to burp on demand to clear much of the misdirected air
What I am really saying is, this situation can be awful or another source of fun & many of the folk here sure know how to wrangle the fun out of the the torture
Cheers & good luck & we are here to support you
DSM
xPAP and Quattro std mask (plus a pad-a-cheek anti-leak strap)
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wlflady777
- Posts: 3
- Joined: Wed Oct 05, 2005 2:07 pm
Lori,
I appreciate your response and take your suggestions for positive thinking from the generous and warm place I can already see that you have in this forum!
I only wish I'd been able to read this site BEFORE I showed up to pick up my equipment so that I'd have had more realistic expectations....you see, I was 100% optimistic and had absolutely no idea that there would be adjustment difficulties wwith the CPAP or that they were common. The staff at the sleep center never suggested such, and they were my only source of information initially. All I heard is that I wouldn't believe how good I'd feel. In fact, the RT who gave me my equipment exclaimed that it had been a long time since she'd seen someone so eager to begin CPAP therapy. Hence, my disappointment....
I know what I'm about to say is probably "too much information", but I feel compelled to defend my reaction and my posting from last night a bit. True anxiety disorder manifests itself in very physical ways. In my case, the medical professionals who have been treating me over the years are truly amazed that : 1) I survived the horrific series of events which precipitated the anxiety disorder and especially 2) that I am as highly functioning as I am. According to them, most afflicted with my severity are not able to work outside the home or live alone, and yet, I proudly hold down a full-time professional position and own my home...and am minimally medicated. Most of the people with whom I have had regular contact for years in non-social settings have no clue as to my history. I try to live my life without bitterness and try to keep as much of a sense of humor about myself as possible.
However, it is a naturally protective tendency of mine to avoid circumstances and situations which are known to trigger the full-blown panic response. When I awoke on my first night with the mask apparently not sitting right and feeling as though I were choking and had no ability to get air, it unfortunately set off that response, and that's what I'm struggling with. Gosh, I hadn't had an episode of that magnitude in over two years. Given the choice between going through that again and volunteering for a double root canal without anesthesia, I can honestly say I'd jump at the latter.
I appreciate everyone's support and suggestions and apologize for the off-topic ramble.
Deb
I appreciate your response and take your suggestions for positive thinking from the generous and warm place I can already see that you have in this forum!
I only wish I'd been able to read this site BEFORE I showed up to pick up my equipment so that I'd have had more realistic expectations....you see, I was 100% optimistic and had absolutely no idea that there would be adjustment difficulties wwith the CPAP or that they were common. The staff at the sleep center never suggested such, and they were my only source of information initially. All I heard is that I wouldn't believe how good I'd feel. In fact, the RT who gave me my equipment exclaimed that it had been a long time since she'd seen someone so eager to begin CPAP therapy. Hence, my disappointment....
I know what I'm about to say is probably "too much information", but I feel compelled to defend my reaction and my posting from last night a bit. True anxiety disorder manifests itself in very physical ways. In my case, the medical professionals who have been treating me over the years are truly amazed that : 1) I survived the horrific series of events which precipitated the anxiety disorder and especially 2) that I am as highly functioning as I am. According to them, most afflicted with my severity are not able to work outside the home or live alone, and yet, I proudly hold down a full-time professional position and own my home...and am minimally medicated. Most of the people with whom I have had regular contact for years in non-social settings have no clue as to my history. I try to live my life without bitterness and try to keep as much of a sense of humor about myself as possible.
However, it is a naturally protective tendency of mine to avoid circumstances and situations which are known to trigger the full-blown panic response. When I awoke on my first night with the mask apparently not sitting right and feeling as though I were choking and had no ability to get air, it unfortunately set off that response, and that's what I'm struggling with. Gosh, I hadn't had an episode of that magnitude in over two years. Given the choice between going through that again and volunteering for a double root canal without anesthesia, I can honestly say I'd jump at the latter.
I appreciate everyone's support and suggestions and apologize for the off-topic ramble.
Deb
[/u]Sleepless on LI wrote:Deb,
This is IN NO WAY meant to be said like I think it's so easy or without understanding that you have issues that stem from way back, but you have got to really try to change the way you're thinking. When I just read your reply, it is so negative, like you just don't expect things to work or get better. I am a true believe in karma and if you think positive thoughts, positive things will happen. If you think negatively, you will have negative results.
Try to hear what everyone is telling you. I can only imagine how you feel right now because it seems to be a bit beyond what the average person feels when they start. But that's okay. You have so many people here to back you up and support you that you can't fail. Just keep telling yourself how grateful you are that they diagnosed you with something treatable; and not only is it treatable, but it makes your life so much better than it was before once you get past the kinks in the beginning.
Like I said before, you are not alone. SO many people have trouble in the beginning, but attitude is such a tremendous part of succeeding with this. You are being given an opportunity, thank the heavens, to make your life so much better and to vastly improve the way you feel, not to mention improve your health in such a drastic way. Try to take a deep breath, or many, revamp your way of thinking to realize this won't be as bad as you think it's going to be and try to be strong. You will be so glad in the end when you see it starting to work. It's wonderful, honestly. Easy? No. Wonderful? Yes.
I hope you didn't take this post the wrong way. I hear where you're coming from and I know it's not easy for you. But let us be here to help you. We have all been through what you're going through right now and really know how to guide you down the right path. I wish you nothing but success and easier times ahead. Just try to put a smile on your face and really try not to let this get to you as much as it seems to have. You WILL succeed!!!!