Stressed, Depressed, Anxy...Help!

Rustyolddude wrote:JanetLee you need to come to grips with a few things.

First, you and you alone are in control of your life, you are your own master. You need to realize a few things about life in general, for example; police are not there to protect you, only to clean up the mess afterwards. When seconds count, the police are only minutes away. Therefore you need to prepare for your own personal safety in advance. Likewise, you have a fire extinguisher in your home because you can't have a live-in fireman to protect you. The same holds true for your health. Doctors are not there to make & keep you healthy, they are there to help fix & clean up the mess afterwards. You can't take your basket of problems and dump them on the doctors desk and simply ask that they be fixed. You have to recognize your problems then ask the doctors to help YOU fix them.

You need to strive to be more self aware.

Your doctor is trying to be a drill instructor with the exercise demand. You need to brush off the defensive attitude and ask yourself what changes you can make in your daily habits to beat your Doc.. Don't do it for the Doc., do it for yourself, to prove the doc wrong. You need to quit looking at things as burdens and more as personal challenges. You have to want to face and overcome those challenges for NO ONE but YOURSELF. You need to recognize your Doc's next move in advance and beat them to the punch.

Nobody can make you do something that you don't want to do. You have to want to do it for yourself.

There are triggers in your daily life that cause many of your feelings, especially depression. You need to learn to recognize these triggers. You might might like to watch movies on TV that make you cry, maybe because you feel sympathetic towards the character. There might be certain things that you see while out in public, perhaps a mother disciplining her child, that trigger sadness or depression. The same for things that trigger your anxiety. You need to recognize these triggers and work on avoiding them. You need to work on being self aware so when you first detect such triggers, you redirect your attention elsewhere. You can modify your behavior without any doctor giving you orders. Make sure others around you understand too. If someone invites you to sit and watch a movie that you know is going to make you feel bad, tell them so and go do something else. If you know in advance your Doc. is going to be hard on you, prepare yourself mentally in advance. Anticipate it and have a response already in place.

You need to work on recognizing things that make you feel good about yourself and the world. Make a list of those things. If you feel good when you accomplish something as simple as making your bed, put it on your list and each time you accomplish it, check it off. Take a moment to savor the accomplishment and continue on. Don't go and make a great big list all at once, concentrate on very small steps. You can write one or two things on a note. Like wash the dishes, make the bed and these can be your goals for the entire day. Maybe taking a walk is a goal for the day. (I don't mean to be overly simplistic or patronizing, these are just simple examples). Write the goal on a note, when you complete it, crumble it up and throw it away.

You need to start small and work in very small steps to success. Savor the little victorys, totally forget the failures; do not dwell on them for a single second and keep moving forward.

As a side note, a very dear friend of mine suffered for years with Bi-polar disorder. I watched her reach the very edge of her life. It wasn't until she finally realized, even after being committed to mental hospitals multiple times, dozens of doctors & therapists, living in a drug induced fog, that she had to take control of her life. She had to sort out the meds and they effects that they had on her brain & find the right combination, she had to take control. In the end, she crawled up out of the deepest, darkest pit I have ever seen a human being in and found a beautiful life. She went to school, became a nurse and has a wonderful daughter. NO ONE but her can take the credit for her transformation, not the doctors, not the therapists, not her family or friends. Yes, there were always folks ready to support her but they couldn't do anything to help unless she wanted the help. It was her determination alone against the all the challenges that brought her back from the edge.

As for hating CPAP, I never did. I learned about it, prepared myself for it and I faced it head on and adapted to it from day one. It's just another part of my life that makes me feel better, and I like feeling better.

I hope you can find the path to feeling better as well.

Rustyolddude wrote:JanetLee you need to come to grips with a few things.

First, you and you alone are in control of your life, you are your own master. You need to realize a few things about life in general, for example; police are not there to protect you, only to clean up the mess afterwards. When seconds count, the police are only minutes away. Therefore you need to prepare for your own personal safety in advance. Likewise, you have a fire extinguisher in your home because you can't have a live-in fireman to protect you. The same holds true for your health. Doctors are not there to make & keep you healthy, they are there to help fix & clean up the mess afterwards. You can't take your basket of problems and dump them on the doctors desk and simply ask that they be fixed. You have to recognize your problems then ask the doctors to help YOU fix them.

You need to strive to be more self aware.

Your doctor is trying to be a drill instructor with the exercise demand. You need to brush off the defensive attitude and ask yourself what changes you can make in your daily habits to beat your Doc.. Don't do it for the Doc., do it for yourself, to prove the doc wrong. You need to quit looking at things as burdens and more as personal challenges. You have to want to face and overcome those challenges for NO ONE but YOURSELF. You need to recognize your Doc's next move in advance and beat them to the punch.

Nobody can make you do something that you don't want to do. You have to want to do it for yourself.

There are triggers in your daily life that cause many of your feelings, especially depression. You need to learn to recognize these triggers. You might might like to watch movies on TV that make you cry, maybe because you feel sympathetic towards the character. There might be certain things that you see while out in public, perhaps a mother disciplining her child, that trigger sadness or depression. The same for things that trigger your anxiety. You need to recognize these triggers and work on avoiding them. You need to work on being self aware so when you first detect such triggers, you redirect your attention elsewhere. You can modify your behavior without any doctor giving you orders. Make sure others around you understand too. If someone invites you to sit and watch a movie that you know is going to make you feel bad, tell them so and go do something else. If you know in advance your Doc. is going to be hard on you, prepare yourself mentally in advance. Anticipate it and have a response already in place.

You need to work on recognizing things that make you feel good about yourself and the world. Make a list of those things. If you feel good when you accomplish something as simple as making your bed, put it on your list and each time you accomplish it, check it off. Take a moment to savor the accomplishment and continue on. Don't go and make a great big list all at once, concentrate on very small steps. You can write one or two things on a note. Like wash the dishes, make the bed and these can be your goals for the entire day. Maybe taking a walk is a goal for the day. (I don't mean to be overly simplistic or patronizing, these are just simple examples). Write the goal on a note, when you complete it, crumble it up and throw it away.

You need to start small and work in very small steps to success. Savor the little victorys, totally forget the failures; do not dwell on them for a single second and keep moving forward.

As a side note, a very dear friend of mine suffered for years with Bi-polar disorder. I watched her reach the very edge of her life. It wasn't until she finally realized, even after being committed to mental hospitals multiple times, dozens of doctors & therapists, living in a drug induced fog, that she had to take control of her life. She had to sort out the meds and they effects that they had on her brain & find the right combination, she had to take control. In the end, she crawled up out of the deepest, darkest pit I have ever seen a human being in and found a beautiful life. She went to school, became a nurse and has a wonderful daughter. NO ONE but her can take the credit for her transformation, not the doctors, not the therapists, not her family or friends. Yes, there were always folks ready to support her but they couldn't do anything to help unless she wanted the help. It was her determination alone against the all the challenges that brought her back from the edge.

As for hating CPAP, I never did. I learned about it, prepared myself for it and I faced it head on and adapted to it from day one. It's just another part of my life that makes me feel better, and I like feeling better.

I hope you can find the path to feeling better as well.

Rustyolddude wrote:JanetLee you need to come to grips with a few things.

First, you and you alone are in control of your life, you are your own master. You need to realize a few things about life in general, for example; police are not there to protect you, only to clean up the mess afterwards. When seconds count, the police are only minutes away. Therefore you need to prepare for your own personal safety in advance. Likewise, you have a fire extinguisher in your home because you can't have a live-in fireman to protect you. The same holds true for your health. Doctors are not there to make & keep you healthy, they are there to help fix & clean up the mess afterwards. You can't take your basket of problems and dump them on the doctors desk and simply ask that they be fixed. You have to recognize your problems then ask the doctors to help YOU fix them.

You need to strive to be more self aware.

Your doctor is trying to be a drill instructor with the exercise demand. You need to brush off the defensive attitude and ask yourself what changes you can make in your daily habits to beat your Doc.. Don't do it for the Doc., do it for yourself, to prove the doc wrong. You need to quit looking at things as burdens and more as personal challenges. You have to want to face and overcome those challenges for NO ONE but YOURSELF. You need to recognize your Doc's next move in advance and beat them to the punch.

Nobody can make you do something that you don't want to do. You have to want to do it for yourself.

There are triggers in your daily life that cause many of your feelings, especially depression. You need to learn to recognize these triggers. You might might like to watch movies on TV that make you cry, maybe because you feel sympathetic towards the character. There might be certain things that you see while out in public, perhaps a mother disciplining her child, that trigger sadness or depression. The same for things that trigger your anxiety. You need to recognize these triggers and work on avoiding them. You need to work on being self aware so when you first detect such triggers, you redirect your attention elsewhere. You can modify your behavior without any doctor giving you orders. Make sure others around you understand too. If someone invites you to sit and watch a movie that you know is going to make you feel bad, tell them so and go do something else. If you know in advance your Doc. is going to be hard on you, prepare yourself mentally in advance. Anticipate it and have a response already in place.

You need to work on recognizing things that make you feel good about yourself and the world. Make a list of those things. If you feel good when you accomplish something as simple as making your bed, put it on your list and each time you accomplish it, check it off. Take a moment to savor the accomplishment and continue on. Don't go and make a great big list all at once, concentrate on very small steps. You can write one or two things on a note. Like wash the dishes, make the bed and these can be your goals for the entire day. Maybe taking a walk is a goal for the day. (I don't mean to be overly simplistic or patronizing, these are just simple examples). Write the goal on a note, when you complete it, crumble it up and throw it away.

You need to start small and work in very small steps to success. Savor the little victorys, totally forget the failures; do not dwell on them for a single second and keep moving forward.

As a side note, a very dear friend of mine suffered for years with Bi-polar disorder. I watched her reach the very edge of her life. It wasn't until she finally realized, even after being committed to mental hospitals multiple times, dozens of doctors & therapists, living in a drug induced fog, that she had to take control of her life. She had to sort out the meds and they effects that they had on her brain & find the right combination, she had to take control. In the end, she crawled up out of the deepest, darkest pit I have ever seen a human being in and found a beautiful life. She went to school, became a nurse and has a wonderful daughter. NO ONE but her can take the credit for her transformation, not the doctors, not the therapists, not her family or friends. Yes, there were always folks ready to support her but they couldn't do anything to help unless she wanted the help. It was her determination alone against the all the challenges that brought her back from the edge.

As for hating CPAP, I never did. I learned about it, prepared myself for it and I faced it head on and adapted to it from day one. It's just another part of my life that makes me feel better, and I like feeling better.

I hope you can find the path to feeling better as well.