How far would you go leading a horse to water

i hate to say it but..... sometimes ya gotta shoot the horse and drink the water yourself,, if ya get my drift...........


good luck

I knew my boy friend had bad apnea just by hearing him snore and hearing the long apnea's. For a long time he refused to do anything. Finally he got very sick, with an infection that attacked his heart ( virus) and he almost died. At that time they told him he had severe apnea while in the ICU. He finally did something about it and is now on CPAP at night and has adjusted well. Its funny, I am on BIPAP and him on CPAP. I am lucky that he always accepted and loved me despite me having a problem needing to be vented, and ironic that now we are both plugged in at night!

wlenz wrote:..... I love the idea of the recording pulse oximeter. .....They are too expensive to make a mistake.

I've been on an APAP for 2 weeks now. Everything is going well.

I just got an oxymeter, a recording one, a week ago. My wife snores terribly and she tried the oxymeter the first night I got it. Considering the accumulated data that first night it is quite evident that she has most probably severe OAS. She's taking appointments for a Polysomnography prescription....and she will bring with her the pulse-oxymetry report. That oxymeter costed me only 139 USD$ all included. You can get it at many places like this one :

http://www.semedicalsupply.com/cms-50e.htm

For some reason that I don't get, the fact that my oxygen went down to 72% during my initial sleep study scared me WAY more than knowing I stopped breathing an average of every other minute (although that fact was pretty impressive, too).

I agree that you have quite a balancing act to do. You don't want to make your friend feel pressured to the point of wanting to avoid the discussion or, worse, you. On the other hand, and only you would know if this would qualify as helpful or too much pressure, you might consider providing him with stats about what happens physically when the brain (and other human organs) goes without oxygen. For example, I have a faint memory that Snoredog (Rooster? DreamStalker? can't remember) said that brain cells start dying with a mere ten seconds of oxygen deprivation.

My suggestion would be a slight variation on what Rested Gal said: Certainly see if his wife will join the "gentle pressure club" and talk with him; perhaps that she even intentionally stay awake one night to "witness" that he actually does stop breathing, if she hasn't already done so. (That's what convinced my ex-husband to get a sleep study. His snoring got so bad that when he did stop breathing, the silences woke me up, much like a city person not being able to sleep in the relative silence of the country. He had no idea he wasn't breathing until I told him so.) However, instead of his wife approaching their doctor, which could too easily be perceived as a passive-aggressive end run, suggest that HE request a home O2 test from his doctor. It has to be his choice. And supplement that (if it seems advisable) with a non-avalanche amount of info about the effects of O2 deprivation.

Also, what Carbonman said.

Oh!! If nothing else works, inform your friend that a LOT of the guys here have commented on not needing Viagara since starting xpap therapy. That's GOTTA win him over.

Marsha

I'm going to echo what others have already said about the pulse oximeter. In fact, I just suggested the same thing to my dad.

My mother is convinced that dad has OSA. She listens to him when he's sleeping and says he stops breathing repeatedly. He's tired all the time and isn't up to doing most anything these days, except napping. My dad has been resistant to my suggestions to speak with his doctor about this and chalks it up to "the usual problems at my age." He's dealing with other health issues and just doesn't want to add anything else to his plate right now. I've told him that many of his other issues could very well be exacerbated by untreated OSA. And since my brother was diagnosed years ago and I was diagnosed in 2007, chances are pretty good that dad has it, too.

Bud dad is almost 80 and has the attitude of, "Why bother?" As if the time he has left on the planet is limited and, therefore, who cares? Well, his family cares. I want him to feel better and enjoy whatever is left of his lifespan, not spend his time napping and feeling crummy, and likely adding to his other physical woes by not treating this condition.

So just this morning, I suggested that he ask his doctor about using a pulse oximeter to see what his oxygenation levels are, as low numbers would be a good indication that his sleepiness needs more attention. Perhaps that would convince him to get a sleep study, once and for all.

I think the pulse oximeter is a great idea, since it eliminates the anxiety over sleeping at a lab, wired for sound (so to speak), and having someone watching you. (Of course, if a sleep study is indicated, those things are still factors to be dealt with; but I think the low numbers would go a long way toward changing a bad attitude about pursuing the cause.) Dad says he'll speak with his doctor about it on Tuesday, and I'll speak with him again to make sure he's following through on that.

Interesting thread to me, as I've been having a similar situation with a friend. I did buy a pulse oximeter and lent it to her the day that it arrived and had her keep it for a week before I got to use it for myself. Despite my attempts to teach her how to use it, we only got a few hours of data before it fell off and then she forgot to turn it off, the battery died and she couldn't figure out or bother to recharge the battery because she couldn't figure out how to go set up the menus again, (some folks will just NOT read a set of instructions). But the few hours of her oximeter use did show some very low O2 levels that shocked me, let alone her. My O2 levels were nowhere near as low as hers and mine scared me to work harder at solving the therapy for me. 3? months later, she still hasn't gone to the Dr. to get a referral to a sleep specialist. I did lots of research for her as I did my own and also found a very good diagnosis for ther OSA linked to her Asthma, all that she could take to the Drs.. I've also suggested that she or her husband video how she sleeps, or record the sound, they tried once but something failed and after that it was too much trouble for them to try further. They have 2 video cameras, lots of tapes or memory cards, instruction books, and so on, but her denial is stronger than her health problems.

In learning more about myself over the last bunch of years, it seems to me that many of the decisions or thinking that I've made before the last few months on PAP therapy, have been impaired by sleep deprivation at a minimum, and I don't know all how being sleep deprived inhibits us, but decision making and clear thinking and other psychological and physical things I know in myself are definitely impaired. So when I'm dealing with others who I suspect that have OSA and I want to help, I need to also realize that their view of themselves and the world and their decision making ect. are also likely impaired by sleep deprivation. With clearer thinking they might understand better, but which comes first?

So in the end, i think that you and I are dealing with someone who's thinking is impaired, to one degree or another. If they get some rest on their own they go into denial, if they're tired then apathy or disillusionment and still denial can creep in.

The psychology of it all is a big subject. Hopefully you can break through with your friend. An oximeter is sure worth a try. I can loan you mine if you can't buy one for you / him?