Less than helpful responses

SheZAAM! wrote:OK.....*rant on*

I've seen enough of these type of responses that I need to say something....

When someone is struggling with OSA and/or xPAPing, it is NOT helpful to say,

"Get your life insurance paid up"
"Prepare a will"
"Let your family know that you'll be dead soon, so get your affairs in order"
Etc.

All this does is drive people away. This post is a perfect example: viewtopic/t38040/I-cant-get-myself-to-u ... chine.html

...rest of original post deleted...

Okay, so where is your helpful post in that example you provided?

You took the time to post this rant... yet did not bother to be helpful?

Okay, enough of that... lets not degenerate down into bickering and get on with the zen of cpap.

I'm impressed by the level of insight in this thread--from the first post to the preceding one and all the ones in between. This board impresses the heck out of me much more often than it disappoints me.

Carbonman used an interesting expression the other day. It was "subtle use of 2X4 therapy." It sounded self-contradictory to me at first. So I dogged him. But the more I thought about it, the more I wondered if it pointed to an approach to the 'how to help the complainers/whiners' question.

For example, maybe when someone shows up in denial looking for permission to quit, instead of someone saying, 'Look, Pal, I know your kind, and you're gonna die,' someone could say, 'I hear you, but I long ago decided I need to stay alive, and here's what has helped me do that.' In my opinion, that touch of dignity, along with directing the sharp end of the point away from the recipient, could go a long way toward getting the 2x4 job done without hurting anyone. After all, that would be in line with the winning selection in the 2x4 poll: "I want to hear others' experiences."

Just a thought. Maybe a stupid one. If so, feel free to flame me--I can take it. In fact, I kind of enjoy it!

I put off going to the doctor for a diagnosis for a few years when I knew what I had could only be sleep apnea, but I figured I'm still young and the worst that was going on was I would be a little tired. Over the past few months my naps became uncontrollable and I had no energy to do anything, but it still took my parents overhearing me at Thanksgiving to coerce me into seeing a doctor about it. Even after my one night of sleep study where they hooked me up to the CPAP after only 2 hours I figured I'd just sleep on a ramp or sleep on my side, and I was determined to tell the doctor where he could shove the CPAP hose when I went back for my test results. The only thing that changed my attitude was seeing that over 90 apneas/hour and virtually no actual sleep would most certainly kill me by the time I reached 30. I certainly needed a 2x4, it's the only reason I'm using the machine.

jnk, sorry to spoil your fun but I loved what you said. Here's what jumped out at me, "asking for permission to quit", I was dying for someone here to tell me it wouldn't matter too much if we decided not to use the cpap; "subtle use of the 2x4 therapy"(leave it to Carbonman); "touch of dignity", for me it was the replies to my questions as if they were worthy of an explanation when I sometimes didn't even know what I was asking. As for "complainers/whiners", I think it's really fear of the unknown more than anything else. Education makes all the difference. Dori