Apnea controlling me

Well said JNK!!!!!!!!!!

Giantred, the psycological aspect of dealing with apnea is finding the resolve to overcome the physiological condition. Many of us had periods of self-pity, myself included. However, it is thought of here that you are fortunate to have been diagnosed because many just die without help. I know the prospect of using a machine every night is discouraging, and I'm still sure not excited about it, but I feel better! This weekend I'm going camping with the Boy Scouts with the machine. Life goes on, and yours will too, only better because your health and sleep will return. You will begin to dream again, real dreams, for the first time you can probably remember.

From your description, you need cpap very much. Hopefully with a combination of the correct machine, settings and mask, some good advice from folks here, and some time to make the adjustment, you will be a success story like a thousand others here. Many have turned their lives around with help from cpaptalk.com, myself included. I had no luck with cpap for many months until I thought I was going to have a heat attack at night, and then found this forum. I learned everything I could, actually spent about 6 weeks here full time. After the first 4 weeks I purchased a Resperonics M-series w/ A-flex, with software and card reader from CPAP.COM, and took control of my conditon and therapy. First of all, this "auto" machine is the best, and so much easier for beginners because your breathing feels much more natural. A while ago, like every morning, I download my card, check my numbers and see if my AHI is where it needs to be, and that my mask isn't leaking excessively. It's encouraging to see that the therapy is working correctly.

You can re-establish your career and your life if you resolve to and go to work making your therapy work! Bear in mind that there are much, much worse health conditions you could have been dealt.

I have included my first post and a recent post here to illustrate cpap's effectiveness:

by Georgio on Thu Aug 28, 2008 8:18 pm
Another One Bites The Dust (And is diagnosed with Moderate - Severe Sleep Apnea)...

My brief story: I'm 57 years old, a certified Life Guard, hiked 20 miles within the last year, and have tried to stay fit.
About a year and a half ago, I began experiencing unusual fatigue. Sometimes I found myself very sleepy driving home from work while in gridlock. I would often fall asleep as soon as I was home. I curtailed riding my motorcycle to work, because I didn't know if I would be able to ride it home at the end of the day. I didn't feel like myself and didn't participate at the same level in usual activities. My eyes hurt. My greatest fear was I was dying of something so I went to the primary care Dr. He did the standard lab screening and nothing. I insisted I was tired all the time, and my mother is battling sleep apnea. I then did one overnight study and was diagnosed with classic moderate-severe apnea. Next, another study night with a machine. They said I slept some....but I felt like I laid there all night using all my willpower to keep that mask on.

Months have gone by. Now I visit the equipment provider. They put me in a chair, strapped on some equipment and went through a list of directions. I went home and throw the equipment into the closet where it stayed a few weeks. I was in some kind of denial.....I can beat this.....I can't possibly need to sleep on a "machine".

I must have been feeling bad.....the severity seems to vary, but I tried the mask about 3 nights. It leaked like crazy when I tried to sleep on my side. Back in the closet.

I am laid off work. (I don't even want to think it's related.) Weeks go by. My memory fades, but I went back to the equipment provider. I got a smaller mask and was now able to roll over on my side without an automatic huge air gap.

I was able to keep the mask on a couple hours a night for a few days, and then would strip it off in my "sleep". Back in the closet.

Weeks go by. I'm suddenly feeling really bad, and losing all interest ( and ability) to do usual activities. My concentration is completely gone. I have difficulty formulating thoughts and speak in a very labored way.

OK. I enter the acceptance stage. I'm screwed and need to start fighting harder. Drag out the mask and clean up the equipment. Start a log of the hours that I'm actually asleep. Vow to keep the mask on all night.

Two weeks go by. Have worn mask for 11 nights. Got some sleep. Don't feel that great. They say there is a period that getting used to the mask and blowing air may keep you awake more, just when you need the sleep most. Like a double edge sword.

I ran into my neighbor yesterday. He just returned from a 7,000 mile motorcycle trip touring the western US! I told him I thought of doing that this summer while I was out of work, but, I was diagnosed with the sleep apnea, and wasn't up to it.

He told me, " I have it too". He has been on a machine for 6 years and took it with him on his trip. He said, "It saved by life"...but not before he suffered some health damage, and lost his wife and family before he figured out what was wrong. Obviously, he must be feeling a lot better, and gave me more hope.

I dread going to bed at night. I hate the machine. I have a hard time breathing with the mask and have a stuffy nose due to allergies. I take Fluticasone Propionate nasal spray & Sudafed PE sinus headache each night so I can breath through my nose.

I know you all have similar stories. Thanks for your interest, and any advice is valued. I particularly would benefit from any comments on the equipment I've been provided. I'm really new to this.

Thanks,
Georgio


by Georgio on Fri Jan 02, 2009 11:09 am
When I woke up yesterday, my breathing with the A-flex was so natural, I didn't think the machine was even on!

Keep trying, you will get there!

Georgio

Helloooooooooo...news flash...sleep apnea is treatable. You have no machine or mask listed. You ask no questions about how to get treatment or better treatment. What are your motives for posting here. Your post sounds like someone just trying to stir the pot. What you do is whine and cry...whoa me.

Another news flash... Everyone here has sleep apnea. Most are doing something about it. It's not rocket science. I too used to choke..as many others did on this board. I got a machine and I don't choke anymore....that's what people do.

Personally I don't want to hear how much money you used to make..we all have our crosses to bear...times are tough for everyone now...lot's of people losing jobs or losing their business. Now if you want some help with cpap treatment...I will be the first to try and help you ..but so far you have not asked for any help. If you decide to get some advice, you will find there are lots of giving people here. People that are willing to take their time to give you the best advice they have..often representing years of experience. If you are just looking for a soap box to tell your tales of whoa...save it for your family, friends or business associates. JMHO
Ever heard of tough love.

OK Giantred, now that you are encouraged by our stories, you need step by step instructions to get going (others will have more) and incidentally, welcome to cpaptalk.com:

1. Go to the "user control panel" above and fill out the equipment portion of your profile (use text rather than illustrations) so that your equipment can be evaluated. Indicate in the signature line your "titrated pressure" and your machine settings.

2. Go to the "yellow light bulb" above and read everything you can.

3. Obtain a copy of your sleep studies (complete copies not just the summary), upload them to Photobucket and post them here. These will be used to advise you on an appropriate machine.

4. Obtain a copy of your cpap prescription at the same time. It may be needed if you need to obtain equipment. (I purchased my cpap out of pocket from cpap.com since the basic one the insurance got me had no data and wasn't working for me anyway).

5. Hang out here and ask any question than you have. I have seen over a thousand responses to one question here. We all learn from each other! If you are into it, you can go to "chatting live" above, usually in the evenings for live support and a little cpap humor.

You have taken the first most important step, signing on here!

Georgio

giantred wrote:........ Each and every person that replied indicated that this is a psycological problem not physical. .......

That is just not true. Members here, of all people, know very well that this is a physiological problem. But it also causes psychological problems in many of us.

I read your latest post carefully and can assure you that I have experienced everything you are going through.

But none of that matters, what your family thinks doesn't matter, whether it is fair doesn't matter.

The only thing that matters now is what you are going to do. Are you going to step by step start taking advantage of cpap therapy to improve your physical health and consequently improve your mental health? Or are you going to wither away?

We can pray for you and support you, but the choice to improve is up to you.

a priest lived in a house near a river. Once the river overflowed and was flooding the area.

The fire dept. came by in a big truck and told the priest he should get out and they would take him to safety. He said " No- God will take care of me". They left.

The river continued to rise and he was on the second floor of his house and again the fire dept. came by in a boat and they said " Father- you need to get out now- it is very dangerous". The priest said " No, God will take care of me" They left.

He now found himself on the rooftop and a helicopter came by and they said-" Father- you must get out of here- your house is going to wash away". The priest said " No- God will take care of me". They left.

The priest got swept away, drowned and went to heaven. He asked God' ' Why didn't you take care of me"?

God answered- "I did- I sent you a fire truck, a boat and a helicopter and you refused them all"!

God sent us CPAP.

rooster wrote:

a priest lived in a house near a river. Once the river overflowed and was flooding the area.

The fire dept. came by in a big truck and told the priest he should get out and they would take him to safety. He said " No- God will take care of me". They left.

The river continued to rise and he was on the second floor of his house and again the fire dept. came by in a boat and they said " Father- you need to get out now- it is very dangerous". The priest said " No, God will take care of me" They left.

He now found himself on the rooftop and a helicopter came by and they said-" Father- you must get out of here- your house is going to wash away". The priest said " No- God will take care of me". They left.

The priest got swept away, drowned and went to heaven. He asked God' ' Why didn't you take care of me"?

God answered- "I did- I sent you a fire truck, a boat and a helicopter and you refused them all"!

God sent us CPAP.

WELL SAID Rooster!!!

I have had sleep apnea for 8 years and I am in a different location and have to get diagnosed again as far as the pressure in my cpap. I am also type 1 diabetic and have some other medial problems and the dr told me to take my meds at bedtime and my provigil during the day. It has been working out much better for me. I am on my cpap with the humidifier and the results of my sleep study are not read yet so I am hopeful it will even get better. Still have coughing during the night and sporaticaly during the day but it would be much worse without my cpap.

Don't give up because I was falling assleep during the day and problems sleeping at night and my quality of life was slipping away. It was very depressing and I gave up driving it was so bad. I had a part time job years ago but the sleep apnea also attributed to my losing the job and my co-workers were also worried about me driving home and performing my job. I had to leave for that and other reasons. It's hard visulize but things do get better and you have to be strong and try the best you can to see light in the tunnel.

I sometimes have a tough time explaining myself but it is much better now and try to get over these obsticals a little at a time.

I really hope things work out for you and this forum has helped me immensly so stay with it.

You made a very intelligent evaluation about all of this. Yes, it's beyond my control. Please read carefully. Each and every person that replied indicated that this is a psycological problem not physical. Just like my family and friends, doctors, etc. They said that it's a psychological problem. How is that, if I'm choking in my sleep and my nose is clogged, how can that be pshcological. To summarize this. If I was a gambler, I psychologically could control it by not placing the next bet. If I was an alcholic, I could psychologically stop myself from not taking the next drink. If I was a sexoholic, I could psychologically stop having sex. However, with this condition, someone somewhere is attacking my in my sleep.

Yes. This is not psychological. You have the same simple disability that I have and everyone on this list. Our bodies simply do not know how to breathe and sleep at the same time. Very simply, if you have OSA, like most of us, then your throat muscles relax more deeply than they should be doing when your asleep. Somehow, the mechanisn that "normal" people have that keep both those muscles and the diaghragm from relaxing during sleep, doesn't work in us.

There is a very simple solution to OSA. Its called APAP. It is like taking a tube and putting it down your throat each night so those muscles won't close up when they involuntarily relax. Except that instead of having to have someone untubeate us each night, the machines blow air down our throats which creates the same effect without pain and mostly without serious side effects.

If the simple physical solution of cpap is not working for you, you need to become proactive and find out why and make it work. If you can't do that, then your problem also has psychological components - your unable to do the work to get fixed. That psychological response might partially be due to lack of sleep from your sleep apnea but others have been where you are at and got help and are now functioning at high level again (read my post from today about six months later which I wrote before I read this. Its just one example.).

There are many aspects of our brain that are becominging clearer and clearer over time. Doctors now realize that the difference between "physical" and "psychological" might actually be somewhat arbitrary. All of our mental and emotional processes are caused by physical systems, mostly our neuroendocrine system. Sleep apnea, sleep deprivation, and the cycle of stopping breathing and the anxiety produced, are all too caught up in both physical and pyschological issues to separate out clearly.

First step - get your treatment working. If your neck is hurting from the mask, tell your doctor and get a new mask. People who continue to "go under" as you say you are, need to work hard to stop themselves. Your body will not walk out on its own to get your new working mask. It takes your psychological parts to make it do that. So get going. You don't have to go under any further.