Hey, please let us know you're okay.
It's important!
Hubby doesn't get it.
-
DreamDiver
- Posts: 3082
- Joined: Thu Oct 04, 2007 11:19 am
Re: Hubby doesn't get it.
_________________
| Mask: ResMed AirFit™ F20 Mask with Headgear + 2 Replacement Cushions |
| Additional Comments: Pressure: APAP 10.4 | 11.8 | Also Quattro FX FF, Simplus FF |
Most members of this forum are wonderful.
However, if you are the target of bullying on this forum, please consider these excellent alternative forums:
Apnea Board
Sleep Apnea Talk Forum
Free CPAP Advice
Be well,
Chris
-
Guest
Re: Hubby doesn't get it.
Thank you, everyone, for your feedback, it REALLY helps!
First, Marsha, THANK YOU for your concern about abuse. My 1st husband was a Napoleonic megalomaniac who did hit me (and worse). I learned and grew from that experience, so it would never happen again. My hubby was NOT this way when we met. He was quirky and had some very slight OCD tendencies, but I wrote most of those off to he didn't get out much. Over the last 13 years, it's gotten progressively worse and over the last few years, the symptoms of schizoid and avoidant personality disorders have really come to light. Of course, he will not seek help as "there is nothing wrong". Sleepycarol, I also appreciate your telling me about your experience, it really does help remind me that he has a disorder and it's something that I have to find coping skills for, too. It has started moving toward crossing some lines and I am preparing for the eventual possibility of moving my daughters and myself out if our emotional safety is ever compromised.
I have seriously been considering counseling on my own as it is. My 9yo has developed panic disorder this summer. My 12yo has Asperger's. I homeschool. I'm a full-time grad student. I own my own business. The song from Happy Feet, "Don't push me 'cause I am close to the edge and I'm tryin' not to lose my head" would be me. I had high hopes that CPAP was going to bolster my ability to deal, but I'm finding that it's adding to the stress at this point. While my current mask setup is the best I've used so far, I still have difficulty with sleeping with hoses and straps on my head and things shoved up my nose. I'm sure EVERYONE can relate to that! I think hubby is put out b/c he feels like it's interrupted our intimacy when it really has very little to do with the CPAP and more to do with his attitudes toward me and the family. It just gives him something to blame. I would NEVER stop "hosing" for anything, I had an acquaintance who died from complications related to untreated sleep apnea (she was dxed right before she was due to have her gastric bypass that she was SO excited about and she died within a week of her dx, VERY sad). I want to be here for my daughters. The way hubby is going, they're going to need me even more.
Thank you so much for a safe place to vent frustrations and thank you all for the great advice. You have no idea how it helps.
Gray
First, Marsha, THANK YOU for your concern about abuse. My 1st husband was a Napoleonic megalomaniac who did hit me (and worse). I learned and grew from that experience, so it would never happen again. My hubby was NOT this way when we met. He was quirky and had some very slight OCD tendencies, but I wrote most of those off to he didn't get out much. Over the last 13 years, it's gotten progressively worse and over the last few years, the symptoms of schizoid and avoidant personality disorders have really come to light. Of course, he will not seek help as "there is nothing wrong". Sleepycarol, I also appreciate your telling me about your experience, it really does help remind me that he has a disorder and it's something that I have to find coping skills for, too. It has started moving toward crossing some lines and I am preparing for the eventual possibility of moving my daughters and myself out if our emotional safety is ever compromised.
I have seriously been considering counseling on my own as it is. My 9yo has developed panic disorder this summer. My 12yo has Asperger's. I homeschool. I'm a full-time grad student. I own my own business. The song from Happy Feet, "Don't push me 'cause I am close to the edge and I'm tryin' not to lose my head" would be me. I had high hopes that CPAP was going to bolster my ability to deal, but I'm finding that it's adding to the stress at this point. While my current mask setup is the best I've used so far, I still have difficulty with sleeping with hoses and straps on my head and things shoved up my nose. I'm sure EVERYONE can relate to that! I think hubby is put out b/c he feels like it's interrupted our intimacy when it really has very little to do with the CPAP and more to do with his attitudes toward me and the family. It just gives him something to blame. I would NEVER stop "hosing" for anything, I had an acquaintance who died from complications related to untreated sleep apnea (she was dxed right before she was due to have her gastric bypass that she was SO excited about and she died within a week of her dx, VERY sad). I want to be here for my daughters. The way hubby is going, they're going to need me even more.
Thank you so much for a safe place to vent frustrations and thank you all for the great advice. You have no idea how it helps.
Gray