Sex and the Single CPAP-er

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Thu May 29, 2008 9:20 am

No, Not a full face wearer my mouth is free to do what ever. The only thing is when you open your mouth 12 lbs of pressure come out and it sounds like your groaning anyway. Well one of us anyway. Don

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Thu May 29, 2008 2:10 pm

Taking one's chances is like taking a bath, because sometimes you end up feeling comfortable and warm, and sometimes there is something terrible lurking around that you cannot see until it is too late and you can do nothing else but scream and cling to a plastic duck. -Lemony Snicket

fatfeminist · Post by **fatfeminist** » Thu May 29, 2008 2:24 pm

this. is. hilarious.

glad i am not the only one with family members who are inter-married to other family members.

also, does everyone have an aunt weezy?!

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Thu May 29, 2008 3:13 pm

All I want to know is this - If I'm that hilarious, will you pay to come see me live? Should I get my own theater in Branson?

And, as far as I know, there is only One Aunt Weeza. I'm not real sure who she's kin to, but maybe Jules can enlighten us.

Cheers,
B.

Wirecutter · Post by **Wirecutter** » Thu May 29, 2008 3:35 pm

Well, I'm a newbie here, and I've been on CPAP for about a year and a half. The sex-CPAP thing is something I've thought about a bit, and more recently now that I'm quasi-single. Generally, it's murderous on romantic spontenaity (sp?). There's definitely no sneaking up anyone.

I appreciate that people can find some humor about this - I especially like the names we give ourselves - "Hosehead" and "on the hose" are favorites.

I got a good laugh the first time I tried to talk with the mask over my nose. It's even funnier if I turn up the pressure on my machine.

-M

CUatX · Post by **CUatX** » Thu May 29, 2008 3:47 pm

Anonymous wrote:No, Not a full face wearer my mouth is free to do what ever. The only thing is when you open your mouth 12 lbs of pressure come out and it sounds like your groaning anyway. Well one of us anyway. Don

That WOULD be one heck of a bl<censored>ob!

jules · Post by **jules** » Thu May 29, 2008 4:07 pm

Aunt Weeza is -SWS's. I think he can have and keep her but maybe you can get in line for her trojan laden lifeguard boy friend.

Babs, why go to Branson for a show? Branson may be nice and you can find Carol's brother there I am sure, but what about the pickings closer to home? Just head my way and we can see what kind of show you can put on.

If you won't respond, I guess I am just going to have to settle for Gumby and a cross country fling.

Guest · Post by **Guest** » Thu May 29, 2008 4:13 pm

Jules, I think Gumby and you are made for each other. Enjoy!
B.

jules · Post by **jules** » Thu May 29, 2008 5:09 pm

Anonymous wrote:Jules, I think Gumby and you are made for each other. Enjoy!
B.

So you dumped me? You want Banned and that sleezy motel in Bremerton instead? You probably want Carols serial killer brother over me.

-SWS · Post by **-SWS** » Thu May 29, 2008 6:48 pm

If it's any consolation Aunt Weeza owns three theaters in Branson... and sent Pablo off to manage one of the empty ones!

How this changes the story line in either thread remains to be seen....

GumbyCT · Post by **GumbyCT** » Thu May 29, 2008 7:05 pm

jules wrote:If you won't respond, I guess I am just going to have to settle for Gumby and a cross country fling.

babette wrote:
Jules, I think Gumby and you are made for each other. Enjoy! Laughing
B.

You say it like it's a bad thing- to be balanced. At least - I can figure out how to sign-in!!! ha.

jules · Post by **jules** » Thu May 29, 2008 7:12 pm

GumbyCT wrote:You say it like it's a bad thing- to be balanced. At least - I can figure out how to sign-in!!! ha.

How dare you put down my former online love!!! Lets just see how long you and I last.

*storms off and pouts*

GumbyCT · Post by **GumbyCT** » Thu May 29, 2008 7:15 pm

jules wrote:How dare you put down my former online love!!!

Guess you have no taste in women!!!

jules · Post by **jules** » Thu May 29, 2008 7:25 pm

GumbyCT wrote:
jules wrote:How dare you put down my former online love!!!
Guess you have no taste in women!!!

I guess not --------

This fling sure lasted a long time.

I hope someone else responded to your craiglist ad.

*goes off and sulks more*

allen476 · Post by **allen476** » Thu May 29, 2008 8:05 pm

Babette wrote:Dang Allen, you've just described about 8 of my ex-boyfriends! We're practially kinfolk! Hey, can we set him up with my stepsister? She's on her 4th divorce (should be final soon), 7 kids, no job, but somehow she keeps body and soul together. Helps she lives in Bumf*ck Egypt, where the rent's low... Not a drinker. Your brother doesn't mind converting to Mormon, does he?

He is in Michigan if you want to try him out. I should mention too that he is fresh out of rehab. Much good that did as he was at his favorite watering hole 2 days later. I think the only religion he would like is if involved drinking lots of sacramental wine.

Come on, he is a perfect fit for you. Admit it......

Allen

P.S. You wouldn't have to worry about your CPAP bothering him either. He'll pawn it in to get money for a beer run.