I don't know if I would put that much faith in me. I've been to therapists, psychiatrists (still see one quarterly due to what it is that I specialize in, in law enforcement), psychologists, and psychotherapists.DreamDiver wrote: ↑Thu Apr 16, 2020 10:07 amWithout doubt. It makes me remember too the health care workers in hospitals all over the world right now that are seeing so much. We could not be here without your service. Thank you.Midwest_non_sleeper wrote: ↑Thu Apr 16, 2020 9:32 amHey, count your blessings. After being in the military and being deployed, and now in law enforcement for 15+ years, I regularly die or am killed in a myriad of ways in my dreams. It happens so often now that I basically just shrug them off. I have been: Drowned, shot, stabbed, choked to death, fallen from various things, including a couple of buildings, run over...and oddly enough, in my most recent one, I died from being stung by bees repeatedly? At this point, I beginning to think the 'ole Reaper is just having fun with me. Afterwards, me talking to my wife: "Welp, died again last night, I'm off to work honey, have a good day, love you!"
"Dreams are weird" is the understatement of the century.
I'm curious...
If anyone may have secrets on how to destress from work prior to bed, it's got to be you. Perhaps you'll share some insights?
They all were a minor help, honestly. I think that I reached the point where my brain took matters into its own hands and basically built a psychological wall around all of the bad. It's still there, it's just obfuscated. When I lie down at night, I am literally sleeping within one or two minutes. I've basically just taught my brain to...shut down. Of course, that doesn't help after I'm sleeping, hence the very explicit dreams. The fact that I remember them at all is bothersome, because that means I'm probably waking up too early, before they can be filed away and forgotten forever.
My ability was bred out of necessity to discontinue catastrophic damage I suspect, but there are some things that I did. After work, I do what needs to be done around the house as quickly as I can, because I know that I need a few hours to do things that I actually enjoy so that I can de-stress. I've always been an avid gamer, so video games take up a little time, riding my recumbent exercise bike takes up a bit of time, the remainder is usually just enjoying the company of my family. Spending time with my kids is always a joy. Sometimes my wife and I will watch a light movie, nothing overly dramatic.
The other thing was I made a commitment to always practice very good sleep hygiene rules. I go to bed at the same time every night. I don't drink or eat several hours before sleep. I don't use electronics an hour or so before bed. The only thing I do in my bed is sleep and read (well...uh, we'll forego the "other" thing out of decency). I only read actual books, not e-books. Doing all of those things allows me to put my brain into some semblance of "sleep-mode". It knows that when I begin the ritual, it's closing in to time for sleep.
Above all of that, I had to learn to not worry about everything. This takes a alot of time and a certain amount of maturity (that I probably still don't have). I had to teach myself to not be concerned about the things that happened during the day, the things I saw, or the things that may happen tomorrow, as I no longer had any control over them. I had to give myself to the chaos for the peace of order, if that makes any sense. In other words, I had to let the chaos happen and not be concerned with it in exchange for the ability to have order in my mind. If there is nothing that I can do at the moment, then I essentially banish it from thought, because it doesn't deserve to ruin my night. I continually told myself that I can face the chaos of tomorrow...tomorrow, there is no need to try to mentally face it tonight. Sometimes it sounds counter-intuitive, but it has worked for me. It's almost a psychological game, but the only player on the board is you. You're beating yourself, and the only way to win is to not play the game (thanks Wargames!).
Thoughts and emotions can be controlled, but it can't be done when the mind has a head start and is racing ahead of you. Slow down the race, catch up, overtake it and earn your peace. Easier said than done, but it can be done. At the end of the day, while you're lying there, mind racing, just remember that no matter how bad things may be, how bad they could be, or whatever may happen tomorrow, the World and the Cosmos are undoubtedly unfolding as they should, with or without a racing mind or your help; ergo, there is no meaningful sense in agonizing over that which you cannot change at that very moment. Banish it and find your peace, trust me, it's there.
Edit: Sorry, that was really long winded and probably not much help.
