New HyStyle Mask!!!!

General Discussion on any topic relating to CPAP and/or Sleep Apnea.
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mikemoran
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Post by mikemoran » Mon Jul 17, 2006 5:36 am

Can't wait until they come out with the HyLite beer flavored mask. If your last name is Miller the marketing should be a breeze.


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GoofyUT
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HyStyle Marketing Dept.

Post by GoofyUT » Mon Jul 17, 2006 6:22 am

We here at the marketing department of the NEW HyStyle Universal interface are pleased and gratified to note the excitement our new product launch has generated in the community of those with hose in their heads!!!

We understand that many of your are perpetually cranky from having slept poorly, BUT ALL THAT'S GONNA CHANGE SOON!!! In the meantime, please remember that we can't supply EVERYTHING so items like Vaseline, moleskin, carpet tacks, mayonnaise, roofing cement, epoxy, Silastic, Elmer's glue, carpet tape, mollie bolts, Sex Wax and the like you're just going to have to provide yourselves.

Having said that, HyStyle is pleased to announce its new "FUN" series of interfaces!!! You all know just how fun-loving and ZANY folks with OSA are, and we're here to make sure that, in the world of xPAP, THE FUN JUST NEVER STOPS!!!!

To that end, HyStyle announces its "Hot Babes" series of masks! New models can make you look just like Britney Spears, Mariah Carey, J-Lo, Paris Hilton or Catherine Zeta-whatever. See the SPARKS FLY in your bedroom the first night that you put one of these babies on!!!

For those interested in the world of sports, we're launching our "Wheaties" collection that includes interfaces modelled after Mike Tyson, Peyton Manning, A-Rod, Roger Federer, Tiger Woods, Shaquille O'Neal, and new for 2006, Zinedine Zidan!! Watch for our upcoming NASCAR series. It'll get your motors started!

Our "Dead Presidents" series will arrive on the shelves of your buddies, our DME network in time for the fall election season. Ever wanted to be Dick Nixon, LBJ or Ronald Reagan? YOU'RE TIME HAS COME!!!

We here at HyStyle leave work EVERY DAY with our sides splitting from all the laughter and mirth that we have in anticipating your needs and sharing your fun!! We SO LOOK FORWARD to our continued partnership with all of you with hose in your heads!

The HyStyle Marketing Team

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CPAPopedia Keywords Contained In This Post (Click For Definition): hose, DME

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CPAPopedia Keywords Contained In This Post (Click For Definition): hose, DME

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Pad A Cheek
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New mask

Post by Pad A Cheek » Mon Jul 17, 2006 6:56 am

Seems like an old Halloween mask could sport new uses, just hook up the hose to the appropriate opening, (based on your preferences of course.)

Just coat the inside with Tincture of Benzoin before you apply the mask to your face or you would surely get air blowing in your eyes as it makes its escape through the eye holes.

What a picture.

Happy hosing.
Karen

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CPAPopedia Keywords Contained In This Post (Click For Definition): hose


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Machine: DreamStation Auto CPAP Machine
Additional Comments: This CPAP stuff at night makes the days so much more productive
And I think to myself...... What a Wonderful World

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roztom
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Post by roztom » Mon Jul 17, 2006 10:19 am

This esteemed group is definitely sliding down a slippery slope.

Tom
"Nothing To It, But To Do It"

Un-treated REM AHI: 71.7
Almost All Hypopneas
OXY Desat: 83.9%

Trying To Get It Right

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Offerocker
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Post by Offerocker » Mon Jul 17, 2006 2:33 pm

mikemoran wrote:Can't wait until they come out with the HyLite beer flavored mask. If your last name is Miller the marketing should be a breeze.
......... Or Peroni !!!
roztom wrote:This esteemed group is definitely sliding down a slippery slope.
WHEEEEEEEEEEEE ! ! ! ! !


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Humidifier: HC150 Heated Humidifier With Hose, 2 Chambers and Stand
Additional Comments: Comfort Sleeve
Respironics Auto C-Flex, HC-150, Activa, CL2 Simple Cushion, ComfortSleeve, Saline Snorter.

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birdshell
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Top Ten Reasons to Buy

Post by birdshell » Mon Jul 17, 2006 6:00 pm

Top ten reasons to buy a HyStyle mask from GoofyUT:

10. Lifetime guarantee

9. No nares = No problem

8. For your convenience; pantyhose available from restedgal.com

7. S & H a low, low $1,000

6. Two words: “dishwasher safe”

5. Makes a great Halloween costume.

4. Avoid troublesome co-pay: NO insurance accepted

3. So sexy your bed partner attacks!

2. Circumvents evil DME’s

2. Those nasty velcro burns!

1. Great Salt Lake mineral packet included FREE with every order

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Bookbear
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Post by Bookbear » Mon Jul 17, 2006 8:32 pm

roztom wrote:This esteemed group is definitely sliding down a slippery slope.

Tom
Or, as we say in soCal.....sliding down the razor blade of life.......

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Getting old doesn't make you 'forgetful'. Having too damn many things to remember makes you 'forgetful'.

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Offerocker
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Re: Top Ten Reasons to Buy

Post by Offerocker » Tue Jul 18, 2006 1:03 am

birdshell wrote:Top ten reasons to buy a HyStyle mask from GoofyUT:
Do you think this would make Dave Letterman's Top 10 List?

_________________
Humidifier: HC150 Heated Humidifier With Hose, 2 Chambers and Stand
Additional Comments: Comfort Sleeve
Respironics Auto C-Flex, HC-150, Activa, CL2 Simple Cushion, ComfortSleeve, Saline Snorter.