Ventilator vs ASV - Final Outcome & Decision

[Madalot]

Those that follow me -- bless your hearts and thank you for your time, patience and support. It has meant a lot to me.

Since the ASV did not provide therapy significantly better (or different) than the Trilogy, the thinking has been that sticking with the Trilogy is better. -SWS felt strongly about it and my doctor agrees. The Trilogy (at its current settings) is more suitable to my condition and with it ever changing, the Trilogy can change with it.

I was able to come to a arrangement with my DME to allow me to continue renting the Trilogy. That is now the final decision in this. Good or Bad, Right or Wrong - It's the Trilogy at the current settings. The awakenings, occasional suffocation episodes, daytime fatigue -- I have to accept them. The daytime fatigue is a side effect of the therapy, but I need the therapy to survive.

I am not happy, especially with the progression of my disease in other areas, but I need to accept it and find the road back to contentment. My life is what it is.

I don't promise NOT to ask questions at times, but the need/drive to find something better is done. This is the best we can do in my situation.

I want to list thanks to everyone that has helped me, but that list would be so long and extensive -- and I'm afraid of accidentally leaving someone out. So, I am extending a huge THANK YOU to everyone for everything they have done.

I'll be around the site and will offer any help I can when I see it -- but as of now, my situation is done.

[robysue]

Maddie,

My heart goes out to you. You've had to make a very difficult decision that had no clear choices. As you move forward it will be important for you to NOT second guess the decision or the process by which you made the decision.

You write:

I am not happy, especially with the progression of my disease in other areas, but I need to accept it and find the road back to contentment. My life is what it is.

I wish you the best in your struggle to accept what is going on and in finding the road back to contentment. Be good to yourself and force yourself to allow yourself to genuinely enjoy one or two things every single day without any worries or any regrets or any "what ifs".

Robysue

[chunkyfrog]

Bless you, Madalot.
Hang in there.
Lots of prayers are coming your way.

[JohnBFisher]

Madalot, I am thinking about you. I hope that as you continue your journey you will find peace. May you find peace enough to realize that as you reach out to help others you will also find a contentment that draws upon the very essence of our universe. I honestly believe that those who reach out to help others find a deeper sense of contentment with life than those who hoard their lives. You will be in my prayers. And thank you for being you.

[Bright Choice]

" I need to accept it and find the road back to contentment. My life is what it is." So well said Maddie! That is a great goal for all of us. Hopefully you will be less stressed with this decision having been made.

Wishing you all the best!

[howkim]

{{{{{{{{{{Madalot}}}}}}}}}}

[Robespierre]

Best wishes for you, Maddy! ((((HUGS))))

[Madalot]

Such kindness and caring. My thanks to everyone for their words of compassion and wisdom.

I'm okay. A little down over it, but I'll be okay. I always am.

[jnk]

The test of the other machine was useful. If you hadn't done that, the question would have niggled in the back of your brain. And ours.

It is my hope that the decisiveness and the acceptance and the resolve that you have expressed in connection with Trilogy, once those things have all soaked down into your brain deep enough to reach the breathing-regulation parts, will result in some better sleep and a touch more energy and contentment and comfort during the day. The brain has amazing power to adjust to things over time if we feed that ability with our mental approach to it.

I really respect the way you deal with all of this stuff, ya know.

Thank you for continuing to include us by posting about it. And please continue to do so.

Please.

[HoseCrusher]

Horse crap...

It is NOT over.

You have just reached a new plateau. We may be able to put our heads together and come up with something else that may interest you.

Just what that will be, I haven't a clue. Until then remember that you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

[nanwilson]

Maddie
You tried everything, you are not "settling" for something less. Kuddos go to you for "trying" in the first place, you have never settled for what was handed to you. It has been a hard and rough road for you and I hope things go smoothly from now on. Chin up, and always remember that you have many friends here, even if you just need to vent, I'm sure one or two of the group will let you get things off your chest with a few hugs and kisses.
Cheers
Nan

[jbn3boys]

Thanks for sharing your journey, and your decision, with us, Maddie. We love you, and support you in this "final" decision. Please continue to stick around, and continue to post. The cpaptalk family would not be complete without you!

Hugs
jbn

[Madalot]

Again, my thanks for all the kind words.

I am certain that had I not found this forum, I would be lost. I may not be where I want, but at least I understand where I am. That's worth an awful lot. And it's because of the people here that I, at the very least, UNDERSTAND.

[Kiralynx]

Madalot,

Keeping fingers crossed for you.

A friend of mine with post polio syndrome has a bumper sticker on her electric chair.

"If our troubles make us stronger, I must be Arnold Schwarzenegger"

I think it applies....

[Madalot]

A friend of mine with post polio syndrome has a bumper sticker on her electric chair.

"If our troubles make us stronger, I must be Arnold Schwarzenegger"

I think it applies....

I had just gotten up and was still foggy when I saw this, but I still busted out laughing.

Thanks for that. I needed it.