CPAP Golden BLOW Awards

mikemoran · Post by **mikemoran** » Wed Mar 08, 2006 12:19 pm

The Grammies last tune is but a memory. Golden Globes have spun up movie sales. Oscar has bowed out for another year. So for those of you who are feeling award ceremony deprived, CPAP-Probe is proud to present the Golden Blow Awards. It is time for all of us users to give proper recognition to those members of the Medical and CPAP Industry who are outstanding in the field (right before the harvester comes). Here is a list of this years winners:

Guest Who It Is category – This is the award for the Manufacturer who generates the most Guest postings touting their own product. The first Golden BLOW goes to …. CPAP-Pro. According to the Guests it is the greatest thing since air, but they never seem to join in on any of the threads where actual users critic the product.

See It, But Don’t Breath a Word About It category – Award for the product most teased by the manufacturer with them minimum information released. Respironics M Series was the run away winner this year. Such pretty pictures and absolutely no info. Where did they hide the LCD readout?

Quick Change Artist category – Develop that product, run it through focus groups and get it to the marketplace as quick as possible only to find it doesn’t quite work on real people. Respironics Comfort Curve was the stand out choice. Hmmm now that I can have colors to match my pajamas, can I have a headgear that might actually keep it in place? Was it 2 months before they sent out the new headgear?

Lets Gouge Them While They are Down category – The Award for DMEs who go that extra mile to suck the last penny out of your wallet. This is for those online vendors, (which CPAP.com was not one of), who decided they should charge for the new Comfort Curve headgear that was being provided at no cost by Respironics.

Um Close but No Cigar category - The lets steal from our competitors but not quite get it award. ResMed wins hands down for the new EPR function in the S8 line. Hey its just like C-Flex but better because you don’t get to use it in Auto mode. Just what I want, a nifty feature I can’t use for the mode I bought the AutoPAP for in the first place.

The list of awards goes on and on.

The Everybody Loves It But My DME Claims Its Garbage – Any AutoPAP
Totally Worthless But Insurance Will Give It to You For Comfort – Passover Humidifiers
Why Can’t American Manufacturers Do That – Aussie Heated Hose
Doctor’s Least Understood Innovation – AutoPAP
Most Home Modified Product – Everest Headgear (Aura)

roztom · Post by **roztom** » Wed Mar 08, 2006 12:31 pm

Good writing Mike.

I have enjoyed several of your recent posts.

Thanks,

Tom

chdurie2 · Post by **chdurie2** » Wed Mar 08, 2006 1:26 pm

hilarious. i'm too new to get all the jokes, but the ones i get are great. keep 'em coming.

ozij · Post by **ozij** » Wed Mar 08, 2006 1:37 pm

Hi Mike,
I missed your humor, and it's good to laugh again

O.

rested gal · Post by **rested gal** » Wed Mar 08, 2006 5:51 pm

...as always...

For people who have missed some of Mike Moran's old classics, here ya go --

LINKS to mikemoran humor

roztom · Post by **roztom** » Wed Mar 08, 2006 8:40 pm

Unbelievable !!! We are so fortunate to have such a prolific writer on this site.

Aside from sleep and maybe sex (?) humor is the best medicine.

With every xPAP ought to come a subscripion to Mike's Fables.

They are terriffic.

Thanks Mike - I look forward to reading all of them and Rested Gal, thanks for posting that link.

Caution: don't read Mike's stuff with your mask on - it's hurts too much to laugh against the pressure.

Best,

Tom

chdurie2 · Post by **chdurie2** » Wed Mar 08, 2006 9:08 pm

you're pretty funny yourself, roztom.

Sleepless on LI · Post by **Sleepless on LI** » Wed Mar 08, 2006 9:09 pm

He's baaaaaaaack. So what is happening with the book you were going to publish, "This Book Blows," I think you said was the title? Hope you're still planning on going through with it. See you on Oprah...

mikemoran · Post by **mikemoran** » Wed Mar 08, 2006 9:30 pm

Now , now haven't been gone. Just regrouping a bit LOL. I think if you search real hard you will find a few nuggest here and there throughout the last few months. The book is about two weeks away from publishing. Just approved the cover and am in the final edit phase. But as always you get it here free first.

Just happy some people enjoy my tenuous grip on sanity

Sleepless on LI · Post by **Sleepless on LI** » Wed Mar 08, 2006 9:34 pm

Mike,

That is TERRIFIC!!! Please let us all know when it's ready for sale. I know I speak for many of us when I say your laughter has made this condition so much easier to bear and I would be thrilled to own a copy and be able to say "I knew him when..." Think I could get an autographed one out of this???

chdurie2 · Post by **chdurie2** » Wed Mar 08, 2006 9:53 pm

do you really have a book almost out? is it all cpap humor or other stuff? yes, see you on oprah. (but i hate oprah)

Gidgie · Post by **Gidgie** » Wed Mar 08, 2006 11:46 pm

YOU.......Funnyman Mike are a real treasure, and if your grip on sanity is that tenuous, think about all these folks that have funnybones in them, but just can't the starter. DON'T, what ever you do, go sane on us! What would we do without you?

chdurie2 · Post by **chdurie2** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 12:01 am

I now have become more educated about you, as i am a newbie. of course, your posts made me howl so much my burned-out nose doesn't hurt quite as much. i haven't read everything, but i was wondering if you have hit the fashion angle yet. you know, the setup is a sleep accessory, and i was positively drooling when i saw the teal-colored stripe in the activa. (i did this a few years ago when there was no color. and the textures of the different kinds of silicone (it used to be all one thickness.) to kind of a fashion gal, it was positively exciting.

Darth Vader Look · Post by **Darth Vader Look** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 12:53 am

I really enjoyed the awards and was able to cut the reading time down from 3 hours to 2 hours and 59 minutes. My speed reading skills have improved since being on PAP treatment.

Mike, I was just wondering if the "Doctor doesn't understand APAP setup" award was a preshow award You know the category where the doctor leaves the APAP set wide open (4 to 20 cm) or sets a span of 2 (say 8 - 9cm) like my doctor did.

Where was the best dressed Aura Headrest award. I think the competition was strong but my vote was on Linda 3032. Flash to red carpet pictures good choice

Of course this was a multi-faceted award category wasn't it with rested gal winning on production & de-engineering of the aura and jcarn winning in the Things you can do with a rubber ban and an aura award.

Hey can't wait until the next awards.

Snoredog · Post by **Snoredog** » Thu Mar 09, 2006 2:04 am

and don't forget the sleep doctor that doesn't believe in Full Face masks because he thinks cpap pressure will blow the tongue into the back of the throat

Mask

Additional Comments: Large mask collection

Mask

Additional Comments: Large mask collection

Mask

Additional Comments: Large mask collection

Mask

Additional Comments: Large mask collection