Cannot function daily life, please help!

[Countrygirl]

I've been reading every reply and I'm so grateful for your alls concern, it feels so good to know that complete strangers can care about me...maybe there is hope for our world yet.
I've been thinking today (what little i can) and I've realized that maybe one of the antidepressants I'm on may be doing this stuff to my mind and body. I have been on the generic version of WELLBUTRIN XL for 12 years now. In the early years it seemed like it was helping but looking back now, I'm not so sure. It's a long story, well basically the last 12 years of my life have been a nightmare and this is what happened. I was a single mom of 2 wonderful kids, my daughter Bailey and my son Noah. Noah is considered "special needs" and Bailey is normal. Anyway, in 2008 i had taken a brief break on working on my Bachelors degree in criminal justice and enrolled in the police academy. After working my tail off to get the highest grades and many tears of anxiety, i graduated academy, I was then a class A peace officer. Shortly after graduation, I had my first panic attack and that is when my life took a sharp turn. If you have never experienced a panic attack, well, let me just say it felt like a heart attack. It scared me so bad that when i saw my dad, I clung to him like when i did as a little kid. Yeah. I went to the family doctor after that because i kept having these attacks. The doctor put me on WELLBUTRIN, CELEXA, and XANAX. It took about a month but they got me stable, however, looking back, i don't think that i really needed the antidepressants, but who knows. Anyway, since i graduated college and academy, i have never been the same since. The me i used to be, bold, strong,athletic, physically fit and happy, that person left and this mess i am now is what came of me after 12 years. All I've wanted since, is to be me again....still trying to find that woman, I know she's here still because every once and a while she pops in to say hi and no I'm not crazy. Just a random, no rhyme or reason, the clouds part and the sun shines on me and I'm me again.
So, with the issues I've been telling you all about, yeah, I definitely know sleep apnea has been a part of it but i was researching more today, trying to find an answer...and it led me to the thought to research my Welbutrin more because it was the only medicine I've been on consistently for 12 years. What i found is very disturbing and made me decide to ask my doctor to taper me off of it.

[Julie]

Best idea I've heard all day - is it actually happening now, or ??

There aren't many meds that can be taken over so long by anyone... bodies change, circumstances change, etc...

Please let us know how things are going, and if your MD isn't helping get another MD, but definitely stay on track... good for you for realizing you need to do this.

[DreamDiver]

Best idea I've heard all day - is it actually happening now, or ??

There aren't many meds that can be taken over so long by anyone... bodies change, circumstances change, etc...

Please let us know how things are going, and if your MD isn't helping get another MD, but definitely stay on track... good for you for realizing you need to do this.

I concur with Julie. While sometimes our bodies require a medication (for instance thyroid meds) other times it's good to find out how well our bodies can heal on their own. Long-term wellbutrin and other panic-attack meds probably needs to be re-examined, especially if they're behind all the skin crawl and shaking. I'm glad you're educating yourself about what you're taking! I hope you'll contact your doctor soon about that, and tell them about your symptoms.

Chris

[zonker]

So, with the issues I've been telling you all about, yeah, I definitely know sleep apnea has been a part of it but i was researching more today, trying to find an answer...and it led me to the thought to research my Welbutrin more because it was the only medicine I've been on consistently for 12 years. What i found is very disturbing and made me decide to ask my doctor to taper me off of it.

oh my! i'm SO happy that you have dug into this. i was at my wits end trying to figure out what your problem was.

now that you've discovered a probable culprit, let's hope tapering off the drug can help you start to get the benefits of cpap therapy.

please come back to this thread and let us know how it goes.

good luck!

[Countrygirl]

Julie, chris ,and zonker,

Thank you so much for your concern! I have more physical issues besides what I've told you but i was afraid to lay too much out on you all at once but basically I'm too dang young to be feeling this dang old. Julie, to answer your question about if i had already started taper off welbutrin, no I haven't. Since i moved to KC, Mo in January, I've been trying to track down a good psychiatrist,GP, and counselor. All i have found so far is gp which I've been trying to reach for 3 days now, so I'm getting a little frustrated. My spine, muscles, and head need examined and hopefully physical therapy. So happy that I'm not completely alone, that you guys are here for me! Love you guys so much!

[Rob K]

When I first started feeling bad about seven years ago. I talked to some doctors, told them I was not sleeping well at all and felt terrible. The first thing they put me on were antidepressants. They made me quite ill so I told them no way and lets figure something else out. Turned out I had sleep apnea. Later on I spent a good deal of time at Mayo Clinic in Rochester for diagnoses and treatment. When I was there, everywhere I turned I talked to professionals that were trying get people off all the unnecessary drugs that are prescribed by their regular doctors. I really hope you can get this figured out. Keep us updated.

[Rob K]

I drink 2 cups of strong dark roast coffee in the morning and it doesn't get me up and going, instead, 2 hours later i feel like laying down and taking a nap. Do you all go through this too?

Yes, back when I started cpap therapy there was nothing that would bring me around. I was like the walking dead until a couple years later when I gave up on the docs and found this forum. Turned out I needed higher pressure settings on my machine and to get my AHI numbers as low as possible.

[DreamDiver]

I drink 2 cups of strong dark roast coffee in the morning and it doesn't get me up and going, instead, 2 hours later i feel like laying down and taking a nap. Do you all go through this too?

Let's examine this... While dark roast coffee has most of the caffeine baked out of it, contrary to what most understand, I wonder how much caffeine you're getting and if that might be contributing to your shakes. Also, how much sugar is in your coffee? If you're using a lot of sugar and caffeine in the am, it sounds like you're experiencing a sugar crash two hours later. Is this the case? What would happen if you weaned yourself off of coffee and sugary drinks? Like, completely?

Chris

[Miss Emerita]

Let's examine this... While dark roast coffee has most of the caffeine baked out of it, contrary to what most understand, I wonder how much caffeine you're getting and if that might be contributing to your shakes. Also, how much sugar is in your coffee? If you're using a lot of sugar and caffeine in the am, it sounds like you're experiencing a sugar crash two hours later. Is this the case? What would happen if you weaned yourself off of coffee and sugary drinks? Like, completely?

Chris, I did not know this about dark roast -- thanks! Countrygirl, one way to wean yourself off caffeine is to start "diluting" the coffee beans or grounds that you make your coffee with. I used to drink full-caff French, then went down to 75/25 full/decaf for a couple of weeks, then to 50/50. No headaches or problems with a.m. sleepiness. I don't know if I could go to 00/100 with no effects, but the reduction has really helped me avoid triggering tachycardia.

[Countrygirl]

Chris and Miss Emerita,

Thank you for letting me know these things, I always appreciate your imput. The reason I'm leaning to the welbutrin being the problem is because I've been drinking dark roast with 3 teaspoons of sugar and some creamer for years (folgers black silk) and it has never has had this effect on me, however, I have gotten older in the past 12 years and my body chemistry has been changing and because of chronic stress, my body has been stuck in fight-or-flight mode for a few years, my muscles are always tense, ready for a fight at any moment. I am finally at a point and position in my life where all i have to do is concentrate on my wellbeing and not what my kids or a boyfriend has going on or family member. Kids are moved out and doing good and i kicked the boyfriend to the curb. So when these tremors started getting more frequent and larger here lately, i had to think deeper on what was going on with me. Welbutrin is the only med that I've been on consistently for 12 years and instead of my depression getting better from wellbutrin, it's gotten worse, so the other day i really dove into all the info i could find on it to see if any of the side effects match what I'm experiencing and here are the ones that match. Oh by the way, welbutrin is a dopamine inhibitor. Ok, so here are the side effect matches.
1. Parkinsonism, muscle rigidity, muscle weakness, anxiety, urinary tract infections, heat intolerance, tremors, blurred vision, confusion, memory issues.
Welbutrin produces the sensation of anesthesia and produces a mild amphetamine like activity. It also stated that it affects the immune system and can cause autoimmune diseases, which was interesting because my doctor tested my thyroid and found that i was starting to lean into rheumatoid arthritis which is one of the many autoimmune diseases. She asked me if my joints were hurting and i told her not more than I've been able to deal with by taking 800mg of ibuprofen. So there is a nice reading there for ya guys lol. Sorry for so much at once, i kinda feel like I'm back in college again with all this research and writing. Lol

[Miss Emerita]

Oh, I am sure you are right to focus on the welbutrin -- didn't mean I thought you shouldn't. But you might also want to look at the caffeine/sugar load, exactly for the reason you say. Our bodies do change over time. My husband and I would make our final pot of coffee of the day at 9 pm way back when, and even ten years ago, I'd drink a cup after dinner. I started paring away the evening coffee, then the afternoon coffee, when decent sleep started to elude me, and now I have just a bit first thing in the morning.

I hope you can get in a good remote consult with your doctor.

[Countrygirl]

Oh yes, Emerita I agree and i think i understand what you're saying but i only drink 2 cups in the morning and no more the rest of the day.

[DreamDiver]

Countrygirl, it looks like you've got this. I hope you'll talk to your wellbutrin doc soon and figure out a proper path for what to do there. I hope you'll keep giving us occasional updates as you learn more or as things progress. It sounds like there's actually less stress in your life right now. That's a goal we should all strive for!

Chris

[Countrygirl]

Thank you Chris! I will definitely let you know when the ball gains momentum! Good news is that I'm already working on my sleep issue, you all have been such a great support group! Thank you with all my heart!

[Countrygirl]

Ok everyone, i finally was able to get a laptop and download oscar but I'm having a hard time being able to concentrate and focus to put charts in the order you want them and then post them. I'm so frustrated that i can't accomplish this! It's so much information to process while my head feels so effd-up.