New and struggling

[Buckhorn dan]

Thanks to everyone for their great posts and support.

I've been recently diagnosed with moderate/severe sleep apnea. Of course I'm in denial and having difficultly facing this situation because the art of sleeping is so sacred to me. In saying this I used to adore going to bed to enjoy my sleep. I'm not the typical poster child for sleep apnea as I am a morning person and never ever nap during the day or weekend. I have my shiny new Resmed E9 and pillow talk mask however I'm struggling with using it. I'm now finding that I'm experiencing anxiety before bed so whether I use the unit or not I can't go to sleep.

So many feelings and so much stress. Truthfully I haven't read through the entire site to garner any great insight from the many who find the CPAP the only choice... hopefully I find that out soon enough. Right now it seems so unnatural to put that mask on. I can't fall asleep...

I guess the first step to acceptance is at least being here and acknowledging the issue.

Thanks for listening.

[lazer]

Welcome Dan,

Hang in there and read through the threads, then read some more! It should get better. Keep positive!

[AbbyNormal]

I just started on my CPAP a few weeks ago. Trust me, I get it. I'm claustrophobic to the extreme and they're having me wear headgear and a chinstrap. Tomorrow they want to move me to a mask that covers my nose and goes up to my forehead. The thought is making me anxious.

[2kittymom]

Welcome from me too, Dan. Can you listen to a meditation or relaxation podcast when you mask up and lay down? That's what has made it possible for me to use the equipment. I have some on my i-phone, along with some talk radio programs. These things take my mind off of the mask, and with repetition it does get easier.
Tonight will be night 14 for me. I, like you, loved my sleep time and looked forward to it. That is until I realized that I could possibly have sleep apnea. The symptoms were most likely there for years; tired all the time, no energy, tossing and turning during the night , drinking lots of water and then multiple trips to the bathroom, waking up after 8-9 hours of sleep and yawning continuously. When I got the results of my sleep study, I was really surprised. I didn't just have a little apnea, I had severe apnea! So it wasn't an option of using a CPAP machine, it was a given. I know that if I sleep without it, I am not sleeping, and I am cutting off my oxygen when I stop breathing. We are so fortunate that these diagnosis-es are possible, and that there is a solution. Without these machines our quality of life goes downhill.
Do whatever it takes to look at this as a positive thing. Make the room super comfortable. Have a relaxation podcast ready to play as soon as you lay down. If the mask isn't comfortable, try another. We will be here for you to encourage you on your path to health and feeling the fog lift.
Lori

[Wonderbeastlett]

I found that taking a nice hot bath or shower before bed helps. My husband bought me the sleep collection from bath and body works which has a lotion, body spray, pillow mist and shower gel. It works amazingly! It has lavender in it which if you just have a lavender candle that would help. Plus I have been taking 5 mg of melatonin just at bedtime which has great health benefits and helps you to stay asleep. Not eating food or drinking caffeine 4 to 6 hours before bed helps you as well to feel sleepy.

All these things together helps me to relax and just sleep. Hopefully this helps!

[BlackSpinner]

I have my shiny new Resmed E9 and pillow talk mask however I'm struggling with using it. I'm now finding that I'm experiencing anxiety before bed so whether I use the unit or not I can't go to sleep.

So many feelings and so much stress. Truthfully I haven't read through the entire site to garner any great insight from the many who find the CPAP the only choice... hopefully I find that out soon enough. Right now it seems so unnatural to put that mask on. I can't fall asleep...
.

Try wearing it during the evening while watching TV or reading or playing a computer game. Get your mind/body used to this thing while you do something that takes your conscious mind off it.

In bed try to make it part of the experience - you are a fighter pilot, or Luke Skywalker trying out his new fighter, the mask keeps you alive where there is no air. If you need to get your mind off it, find a memory of a very pleasant time, most people pick a day at the beach. See it, smell it, feel it, hear it - in other words re-experience that drowsy lovely day.

[jweeks]

Do whatever it takes to look at this as a positive thing. Make the room super comfortable. Have a relaxation podcast ready to play as soon as you lay down. If the mask isn't comfortable, try another. We will be here for you to encourage you on your path to health and feeling the fog lift.

Lori,

That is sage advice.

The thing that helped me was putting my mind in a place that made me happy. For example, I once had a chance to fly jets, so I just pretended that the CPAP mask was the O2 mask, and then visualized one of my favorite flights. I heard from someone else who did the same thing visualizing one of their favorite scuba dives. Anything that one can do to put their mind in a happy face can help divert the attention from the CPAP and what a drag it is to have OSA.

-john-

[RandyJ]

All good suggestions above... Any one of them might relax you enough to feel sleepy. If not, figure out what works for you as a relaxation strategy. Get all your bedtime stuff ready several hours ahead of time so you can spend the interim doing things you enjoy and find relaxing.

My personal strategy has been to put my mask on only when I am 100% ready to sleep... Eyelids drooping, yawning, sleepy time ready... By the time I attach the mask and turn the machine on, I barely have time to lay my head on the pillow and I am out.

If I feel anxious, or if I am awake enough to read or watch tv or check email without my eyes closing, then I'm not ready to sleep.

[kteague]

...Right now it seems so unnatural to put that mask on. I can't fall asleep...

Yes, it is unnatural to put the mask on. Time and familiarity (and a good fitting mask) should help with that. Have you ever had any dental work done? I once had a crown put on, and I first I was hyperaware of it. It felt so odd, so foreign, and I ran my tongue over it almost constantly. Didn't take long before I didn't even notice it any longer. It had become - out of necessity - my new normal.

When you are tempted to think of how abnormal the mask feels, ask yourself if there's any normalcy in suffocating repeatedly all night. As much as I didn't (and still sometimes don't) like sleeping with these extra sensations, they have become my security blanket - my protection against the scary forces of apnea. Hope you find your awareness of the new sensations lessening every night.

[Guest]

Thank you all for the kind words of wisdom. I'm pleased to report that after struggling without sleep for two weeks straight (both with and without the mask) I acutally sleep through the night last night (with the CPAP) and feel refreshed today.

I hoping that I'll be able to enjoy going to bed again and to have the real REM sleep that I always thought I was having even though it's now proven I wasn't. I too think I need to feel 100% tired to be able to lay down and go right to sleep and forgot about the machine. I've not tried music before but may give it a whirl should I be faced with more sleepless nights in the near future.

My wife is so supportive and will do anything to ensure I'm comfortable and calm. I'm very lucky for that.

Thanks again for all your help.

[Conrad]

Thanks to everyone for their great posts and support.

I've been recently diagnosed with moderate/severe sleep apnea. Of course I'm in denial and having difficultly facing this situation because the art of sleeping is so sacred to me. In saying this I used to adore going to bed to enjoy my sleep. I'm not the typical poster child for sleep apnea as I am a morning person and never ever nap during the day or weekend. I have my shiny new Resmed E9 and pillow talk mask however I'm struggling with using it. I'm now finding that I'm experiencing anxiety before bed so whether I use the unit or not I can't go to sleep.

So many feelings and so much stress. Truthfully I haven't read through the entire site to garner any great insight from the many who find the CPAP the only choice... hopefully I find that out soon enough. Right now it seems so unnatural to put that mask on. I can't fall asleep...

I guess the first step to acceptance is at least being here and acknowledging the issue.

Thanks for listening.

Dan,

Wow, I could have written your post about myself, as it is almost exactly how I'm feeling about this whole sleep apnea thing. In reading the posts here I would have to say that I too am not the typical SA sufferer. I do not have any other health issues, I'm not overweight, and I'm in pretty good shape. Unlike you, once I got my machine (three days ago) I put it to use right away. However I did procrastinate for a good bit of time acquiring the machine.

[Guest]

Hi all,

Thanks again for all your encouragement and words of wisdom.

I'm happy to report that for the first time in more than two weeks (with and without the CPAP) I slept last night! Yup, that's right with the CPAP machine. I do feel refreshed this morning (how could I not given the circumstances) and hopefully hae a new confidence when dealing with going to bed.

I as well need to be extremely tired before going to bed. Without CPAP I could find myself watching the clock for hours on end. With CPAP that just causes more anxiety. I haven't tried music yet however if I revert back to not being able to fall alseep I'll try anything outside of voodoo.

I also should mention that I have a great support person in my wife. She will sit up all night with me holding my hand if necessary. I can't tell you how lucky I am to have her especially those night here anxiety kicked n and I couldn't lay down felt I needed to get up and walk around.

Let's see what happens tonight but for the first time in weeks I have a renewed confidence that this may not be the end of the world as originally thought. Buy hey, truth be told I've only had one good night amongst two weeks of hell so I won't get ahead of myself too quickly.

Dan

[Buckhorn dan]

Sorry all... I've pretty much triple posted now... didn't realize that I wasn't signed in as myself and wasn't looking for my post under 'guest'.

[2kittymom]

Dan, so glad you got a great night of sleep last night. I will say that I seem to have alternate nights of good and not so good sleep. Last night was a toss and turn night with the mask leaks keeping me awake. I called my DME this morning and am going in for a replacement cushion. A friend of mine who has been on CPAP for 15 years, says that insurance allows 2 a month, and I found out this is true. I will change it tonight and see if the leaks are less. Also, I'm going to trade in my headgear for the Bella loops. Nothing like a leaky mask to ruin one's sleep!
Lori

[chunkyfrog]

I have always been a huge fan of sci-fi fiction involving space travel.
I just picture myself riding along in one of my favorite books.
I know where I'll be hanging out when I retire--the library!
(that is, when hubby can spare me from the huge home improvement list he has)