I feel for you!
Starting new relationships is hard, and now an extra complication.
That said, a bigger complication is suffocating in your sleep every night. I worried when I first got mine--what will my husband think, I'm not normal, etc--but it's one of the challenges in life you have to overcome if you want to be healthy. Once you learn to accept your OSA, making the proper adjustments with the equipment becomes easier. This is just part of life now, and it's time to take care of yourself.
My resentment against my CPAP
Re: My resentment against my CPAP
~Mama is happy when she sleeps with Pap-py~
Re: My resentment against my CPAP
cpapnewbie, please sign up for an ID and fill in the equipment in your profile. See the link at the bottom of this post.
Then stick around and discuss the problems of CPAP. Some of the problems have solutions. Or at least ways to make them less bad.
Diabetics don't like blood testing and insulin. People who need wheelchairs don't like them. People with broken legs don't like crutches. People don't like taking their blood pressure meds. Apneacs don't like CPAP.
The treatment is often better than the disease.
Apnea kills slowly and painfully. Or slowly and silently. Or quickly. It can be the death of a thousand cuts or boiling a frog slowly.
Then stick around and discuss the problems of CPAP. Some of the problems have solutions. Or at least ways to make them less bad.
Diabetics don't like blood testing and insulin. People who need wheelchairs don't like them. People with broken legs don't like crutches. People don't like taking their blood pressure meds. Apneacs don't like CPAP.
The treatment is often better than the disease.
Apnea kills slowly and painfully. Or slowly and silently. Or quickly. It can be the death of a thousand cuts or boiling a frog slowly.
_________________
| Mask: Swift™ FX Nasal Pillow CPAP Mask with Headgear |
| Humidifier: S9™ Series H5i™ Heated Humidifier with Climate Control |
| Additional Comments: Also SleepyHead, PRS1 Auto, Respironics Auto M series, Legacy Auto, and Legacy Plus |
Please enter your equipment in your profile so we can help you.
Click here for information on the most common alternative to CPAP.
If it's midnight and a DME tells you it's dark outside, go and check for yourself.
Useful Links.
Click here for information on the most common alternative to CPAP.
If it's midnight and a DME tells you it's dark outside, go and check for yourself.
Useful Links.
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RocketGirl
- Posts: 266
- Joined: Thu Nov 03, 2011 10:48 pm
Re: My resentment against my CPAP
You've gotten some support and some tough love with your post, cpapnewbie. I'll only add that the maladies that come on with untreated sleep apnea can be worse than death, depending upon your viewpoint.
My father was a championship snorer who stopped breathing many times per night. He stroked out in his mid-40's, and spent the remaining 20 years of his life unable to care for himself, dependent on others for basic cleanliness and everything else. It was horrible for him and hard on his family.
My sister followed his path, also untreated, and suffered a massive stroke two years ago. She remains unable to speak, unable to feed or clean herself, unable to to go to the restroom unassisted, unable to type on her computer, unable to walk.
I have never been told I snored, but I got tested because of crushing fatigue and the certainty that sooner or later I would fall asleep at the wheel. Only then did I start researching and learn about the connection between even mild apnea and cerebrovascular accidents.
Is CPAP what I would choose to need, in the best of all possible worlds? Well, probably not, but in the world I've got, I need it and that's that. Having seen what happens in my family if it's not treated, do I use my machine faithfully every single night, and exert myself to fix any issues that might occur?
Damn straight I do.
Think of it like this: you've got a steamroller of hurt following close behind you, and a straightforward way to maximize your chance of outrunning it. Use it.
My father was a championship snorer who stopped breathing many times per night. He stroked out in his mid-40's, and spent the remaining 20 years of his life unable to care for himself, dependent on others for basic cleanliness and everything else. It was horrible for him and hard on his family.
My sister followed his path, also untreated, and suffered a massive stroke two years ago. She remains unable to speak, unable to feed or clean herself, unable to to go to the restroom unassisted, unable to type on her computer, unable to walk.
I have never been told I snored, but I got tested because of crushing fatigue and the certainty that sooner or later I would fall asleep at the wheel. Only then did I start researching and learn about the connection between even mild apnea and cerebrovascular accidents.
Is CPAP what I would choose to need, in the best of all possible worlds? Well, probably not, but in the world I've got, I need it and that's that. Having seen what happens in my family if it's not treated, do I use my machine faithfully every single night, and exert myself to fix any issues that might occur?
Damn straight I do.
Think of it like this: you've got a steamroller of hurt following close behind you, and a straightforward way to maximize your chance of outrunning it. Use it.