boyfriend's sleep apnea

I've never been in this kind of a room beford so I'll apologize beforehand for changing the subject or breaking rules. My boyfriend has sleep apnea. He is 41 . About 2 yrs. ago he had his tonsils removed and that helped for a while unfortunately he gained about 100 lbs in the next year and now is having severe problems. He will stop breathing for one to two mins and then gulp in 4 breaths and repeat stop breathing over and over. Can anyone make any suggestions?

This is my first time in this type of forum as well; I hope there aren't many rules. Has your boyfriend been diagnosed? If not get him to a doctor and get his weight gain and sleep disorder checked. My girlfriend is the one that forced me to get it checked and the problems that can arise from neglect are severe - trust me! Things only get worse with time.[/list]

Dear Bettie,

YES! Get him into a sleep specialist NOW! Get a referal from his DR. If he stops breathing for THAT LONG, his Blood/Oxygen levels are dropping to dangerous levels. Heart attack, stroke, depressed immune system, moodiness, extreme fatigue, damage to vital organs; the list goes on and on. Do not delay! This is nothing to play with or ignore.

Peter

Hi bettie,

As Procrastinator and Peter said, do get your boyfriend to have a doctor (any doctor...can be a General Practitioner) refer him to a sleep clinic for an overnight sleep study.

You'll be doing your boyfriend the best favor imaginable, whether he likes the idea or not.

Many people who, themselves, have no idea they are struggling mightily to get air in through a throat that collapses when they are sleeping, are pushed into a sleep study by their spouses or bed partners. You are observant. And you're smart to start researching what's happening with his breathing. The next "right" step for you to take is to push, cajole, insist...whatever it takes... to get him to go for a sleep study.

If he absolutely will not do that, then try suggesting an "at-home" sleep study. If he has OSA (obstructive sleep apnea), an at-home test prescribed by the doctor will uncover the problem. After that, an autopap machine to trial at home may be a good way to arrive at the pressure range that works best to keep his throat open.

A full PSG (polysomnogram) overnight test at a sleep clinic, however, will be the most thorough way to uncover not only OSA, but any other sleep disorder he might have. So try to convince him to get a sleep study at a sleep clinic.

Some bedpartners have resorted to audio taping the gasping sleeper to convince the oblivious sleeper - letting them hear what's going on during that desperate struggle to breathe at night.

Good luck. You're a smart, caring person. Work on him!

/quote] Try proping the head of the bed up. Does he have a cpap/cflex or anyohter type of machine?

This is my first time in any chat room like this one. I also am sorry for changing the subject but I have to know. My husband suffers from sleep apena and it seems to be affecting our marriage. We have been married for almost 3 years and he just started on the machine back in July of 2004 but since then he says he feels better and everything but he still falls asleep every where we go. Church movies out to eat sitting and talking. I will try to tell him he is dozing off or he is asleep and it just starts a big fight. Is he just being lazy or can he really not tell when he is asleep?
I am so confused and flustered about all of this Can anyone help me please.

[quote if anyone has any suggestions or comments feel free to e-mail them to me even if i'm not online. I love my husband I just can't take all the arguing. quote]

to the first lady - get him into a doc, or a sleep clinic before he dies of a stroke in the night.
especially at 41 already - if he's had OSA for most of his life, the stroke should be coming any minute now.

Im sorry that is so harsh - but it is the truth, and that's how serious it is, so for all those people who LOVE an apnea patient who won't go get diagnosed, or won't comit to treatment - treat it for what it is - A LIFE OR DEATH SITUATION.

If he was told he had three weeks to live cause of the foot wide brain tumor protruding from his head, he would listen, but snoring, naw, that's surely can't kill you.

To me, I love my man more then anything, there is (was) no end to what I was prepared to do to convince him to get treatment, and now there is no end to what I will do to get him to keep at it, keep trying and keep optimistic.

I AM NOT AFFRAID of yelling and screaming, or waiting rooms and doctors, or wading through what really is the best equipment or insurance coverage, how many associated disorders are there, or what exactly is the appropriate vitamin suppliment???

I AM affraid to loose my best friend, lover and partner for life sooner then I have to.

Once you do get through to him, and he starts to really FEEL better, you will see the real him, and he will thank you.
But for my experience - we've been working on this for 5 years so far, and everyday we get a little farther and a little better, then some days we slip back, and then forward again - that seems to be the way it is, as with anything.


btw - sorry my posts turn out so long....

Mathurine, never apologize for the length of a post you've written! You are sharing such wonderful insights from the "other side of the fence" - as a non-OSA partner doing everything you can to understand and help your husband in his treatment. You're extremely intelligent, perceptive, and articulate. I'm learning so much from your posts....truly.