I'm bringing sexy back! lol

Surf on 'dating' and you'll get a MILLION threads on the topic.

My best advice - work it into a conversation WAY BEFORE you're headed for the bedroom. Try this:

ME: YAWN! Sorry, had a bad night last night. Fiddling with my mask again. I think I need a new seal, this one's 3 months old.

HIM: What the hell are you talking about?

ME: Oh, sorry, I sleep with a CPAP machine, you know, those breathing machines for people with sleep apnea? I have it. It's been great. I'm so much calmer since I started on it, and people have really noticed that I'm so much less cranky than I used to be.

HIM: Oh yeah? My uncle is on that........................

Bear in mind that he's probably NOT thinking "Oh wow! Disabled chick! I don't want to F*** that!!!" He's trying to get to know you, and wants to bond with you, and will think hard to remember if he knows anything about this topic (because he's MALE and wants to appear to be the expert, of course) and before you know it, you're both talking about all the people you know on CPAP.

The more comfortable YOU ARE, the more comfortable HE will be.

And men, this works both ways. Women are PARTICULARLY geared to want to appear empathetic to you during early bonding and will go out of their way to mirror your reaction to your machine. If you are confident and casual about the topic, so will she be. If you are anxious and fearful, she will be that too. Those people who have reacted badly to a date bringing up the CPAP are mostly mirroring the date's anxiety. Not always. Jerks are everywhere. BTW, this can be a great screening tool for those jerks.

This is way more about mirroring and bonding behavior than it is about the machine. The more comfortable you can become with your machine and your diagnosis, the better off you will be bringing it up in a conversation with your potential lover.

Remember - this is not a contagious disease. You do not catch sleep apnea from sleeping with someone with it. This is so much EASIER a conversation than the one you need to have about HIV and other sexually transmitted diseases. I personally have a way harder time demanding a guy put on a condom than slipping some silicone up my nose in his presence.

Confidence will go a long way in both conversations. Practice here or with friends. The more often you say the words out loud, the easier they will become to say when you need them.

Cheers,
Babs

my AHI actually went up during one sessioin .

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CPAPopedia Keywords Contained In This Post (Click For Definition): AHI

Babs,
You are hoot! lol

and

Zorro,
Woohoo! lol

Grr, i forgot to log in again. That was me as I guess you noticed. uhm, and zorro, because of the topic, i refuse to comment about your location.

Babette wrote:Oh dear.... You know, I never believe a man about the length of his hose - I make him show me first.

BTW, in all seriousness, has anyone figured out how to have sex with masks on? My breathing gets all futzed up. I have to take it off.

Great thread!
Babs

Hopefully you aren't sleeping at that time.

LavenderMist wrote:Grr, i forgot to log in again. That was me as I guess you noticed. uhm, and zorro, because of the topic, i refuse to comment about your location.

thank you the location name describes it pretty well