attention deficit disorder

[socknitster]

Rose,

Yes, I like how she states that this is not a disorder or syndrome, merely a personality type. Once you recognize that you can learn to live more fully and quit being so negative when you fall short.

It also explains a lot about my relationship and why it can be stormy sometimes. I think I am so sensitive to his moods and actions that I over-interpret or maybe I know what he is thinking better than he does. But it certainly gets lively when he makes some "sigh" or gesture after I have made a comment. I interpret it a certain way and he claims he is just breathing or moving or whatever!

My husband also says that as the day goes on, my ears get more sensitive. I make several requests each night asking him to turn the tv down. As the world quiets down around us, the tv just seems to get unbearably loud.

The worst time of day for me is dinner time. After a long day of stimulation, I have to try to coordinate a meal to be ready all at once when my son is the most wound-up and noisy and demanding of my attention. Sometimes I just want to snap. Sometimes I just go lie down in a dark, quiet room for a few minutes until my head clears.

Anyway, thanks again for that link. You may have helped me more than you know. I have said I was more sensitive than most for years, now I know I was right.

jen

[Moby]

Thanks Country4ever.

The doc ran through pretty much the same things with me yesterday. I have simplified my life right down. I am lucky that my husband earns quite well and we have paid off our mortgage, so my life is not stressful. I work 3 shifts a fortnight, and do extra shifts when I feel like it. I have a cleaning lady once a week. No kids at home any more. I am very spoiled, most people have life much rougher than I do and manage so much better.

I was bought up in the countryside, and find the city stressful, even a quiet modern city like the one I live in.

Otherwise the only stresses are truly of my own making, through being so disorganised.

I think the menopause is over, its difficult to tell after having a hysterectomy. I think that post menopause we produce a larger proportional amount of testosterone, so maybe that is affecting the nature of the ADD (if that's what it is).

It's a relief to me to learn that you were a critical care nurse, I am beginning to wonder how I manage at work at all since I have been "watching" my brain more carefully. I am going in today for a six hour shift, (haemodialysis) I am terrified of making a mistake. I am going to get all the meds I give checked and double check everything else I do. But really I don't see how in good conscience I can stay in this job

But I'm jumping the gun, I'll see what the psych says on Friday.

thanks again for the useful info and insights you provide

Di

[j.a.taylor]

Here's an interesting website. It's about "the Highly Sensitive Person." This is a person who is more easily stimulated by what's coming in thru the senses. It may get labeled ADD or ADHD, but it's something else. http://hsperson.com/ If a person is highly sensitive and has a sleep disorder, I'd think it would likely accentuate the difficulties associated with it. Once they are treated for OSA, most likely they will be able to use their gifts as assets, since being highly sensitive is a gift. But being highly sensitive and sleep deprived is very difficult.

Interesting site.

As I was reading this list, it reminded me of a visit my wife, daughter and I made to Times Square a couple of years ago.

• * Are you easily overwhelmed by such things as bright lights, strong smells, coarse fabrics, or sirens nearby?
  * Do you get rattled when you have a lot to do in a short amount of time?
  * Do you make a point of avoiding violent movies and TV shows?
  * Do you need to withdraw during busy days, into some place where you can have privacy and relief?
  * Do you make it a high priority to arrange your life to avoid upsetting or overwhelming situations?
  * Do you notice or enjoy delicate or fine scents, tastes, sounds, or works of art?
  * Do you have a rich and complex inner life?
  * When you were a child, did your parents or teachers see you as sensitive or shy?

Now, I love the city, but something about Times Square overwhelmed me. I was so overstimulated that I told my wife and daughter I couldn't handle it anymore. I needed to find someplace quiet.

It literally brought me to a standstill, and made me physically sick.

Thank God for Central Park.

My wife took me to the park, and I recovered. For the rest of our trip, I enjoyed New York, but avoided Times Square.

I've always chalked it up to being an introvert, but now I'm going to have to check this information out a little bit more.

[RosemaryB]

OK, another of my favorite books: Last Child in the Woods: Saving Our Children from Nature-Deficit Disorder by Richard Louv. From the review at publishers' Weekly

Today's kids are increasingly disconnected from the natural world, says child advocacy expert Louv (Childhood's Future; Fatherlove; etc.), even as research shows that "thoughtful exposure of youngsters to nature can... be a powerful form of therapy for attention-deficit disorder and other maladies

I was having a very difficult time some years ago and lived near the ocean. It was amazing how just going there would restore me, even in the winter (New England coast). James, I can enjoy the city, too, but also can get overwhelmed and worn down by it. I think that the stimulation of a city is very different from the stimulation of nature. Now by nature I don't mean a tornado or anything like that .

[Country4ever]

Hi Moby,
I think you just need to really always (at work) have a checklist and double-triple check things all the time.....but you probably know that.
Also....just know that the foods you eat can affect your thinking too. The older I get, the more I realize how carbs/sugar steal so much from me. Too bad they taste so good and inititally make us feel so good.
I haven't worked for so long, I can't imagine keeping up with the needed rate of thinking and that intensity. You sound very conscientious. You could even keep a laminated card on a lanyard around your neck, with your checklists on it.
I would love to have a SPECT scan of my brain. (maybe not!). I have the feeling it would be a very quiet place. hahaha
I feel that there are big areas of my brain where I just can't get into.

Rosemary, Thanks for what sounds like another great book. (Just wish I could read!)
I think so many people are disconnected from nature. Its so sad. We live on 30 acres out in the country. Development is coming towards us at an unbelieveable rate. But trying to get people to even care that we are destroying so much seems futile.
I, personally, couldn't live without it. It is my salvation in a crazy world.
I'm glad there is Central Park. If it were in my county, it would be bulldozed for more subdivisions.

[RosemaryB]

You are fortunate indeed to live on 30 acres in the country! I sure wish so much land wasn't getting eaten up by development.

[Guest]

I'm going to see the psych tomorrow after work, and I find I'm quite worried about it. I keep going over in my head why I want to see him, in case I forget the things I want to tell him. I could write a list, but I don't know what questions he will ask, so the list would be really long.


I want to know whether the medication I'm taking could be affecting my concentration. I want to know whether the concentration problem is just a character thing or if it is some medical/psychiatric condition. But really, what difference will it make which it is? It won't change who I am, having a diagnosis. It changes the way I think about myself just realising that I have had concentration problems all my life. Will having the blessing of an "expert" make any difference?

The ADD support woman said it was important to have an assessment, that is why I'm going. She also said she would sent me a support group introduction package, but I guess she forgot cos it hasn't arrived.

If my concentration problems do turn out to be medically based, does that mean I don't feel i've failed so much? I have always beaten myself up a bit for doing better at uni/getting further on in my career, for not keeping in touch with friends and so on.

If it is "just my personality" then I guess they are personal weaknesses.

What is the difference between a personal weakness and a medical problem?

I'm getting a bit confused.

Wish me luck tomorrow. I've had three good days in a row now, maybe I am just making the whole thing up...

Di

[socknitster]

Moby,

I can see that you are very anxious about this, but I really think you should giver yourself a break. What you describe doesn't sound unusual or pathological or like you could harm anyone even with a serious job like you have. You just need to develop mechanisms to cope and it sounds like that is what you are doing. That is what I would focus on.

I would venture a guess that you, like me, had people in your life telling you that you were "faking" when you wanted to stay home sick and it has given you, like me, a complex about whether or not you are truly sick or affected or in need of assistence. My parents both worked and when a child had to stay home from school it was a hardship. They always tried to talk me into going to school anyway. They were actually pretty cruel about it. And now as an adult I have a hard time phoning in sick or resting if I'm sick or whatever, because I think I must not be that bad or that I don't deserve it.

So, what I'm trying to say is: Relax. Give yourself a break. Your feelings are valid. Your symptoms are real. You aren't crazy. You deserve help. Maybe not pharmaceutical help. Maybe some kind of therapy that you haven't had access to before. Perhaps you don't need talk therapy to blame your issues on someone or something that happened in your past. Perhaps what you really need is some kind of behavior based therapy where you can learn coping mechanisms. That sounds like it would be more helpful for the symptoms you describe.

That is my opinion. Don't go in there asking if you have a problem. Tell them what the problem is and ask if they can help you! If they can't, ask who can!

Clearly YOU feel there is an issue. So, don't ask them if you have an issue. The idea is to find a way to live your life so that YOU are more satisfied and fulfilled and not so worried about whether you have some syndrome or not.

I'm guessing ADD is actually a normal variation among the human population. Like the highly sensitive person that we were also talking about in this thread--a person like you has strengths to offer the group. Instead of looking at it like it is a flaw, look at it as part of who you are. Figure out how it helps you and figure out what you need to do to make living with the rest of us (who all have differences and challenges of our own) as easy as possible.

Good luck, Di, I hope you get the most out of the office visit.

Jen

[Moby]

Thanks Jen, that is a very helpful post.

The visit went well, I liked him and he was easy to talk to and had a sense of humour.

He says the symptoms could be ADD or OSA from childhood, or both! He says if it is just the OSA it could take (an estimate) two years to get my brain back on track. That surprised me.

He recognised how frustrated I am with my whirring brain, and said that he thinks I notice it now because I am doing more things now than when I was in the lying-on-the-couch stage of OSA. I am doing more things to get in a muddle about.

We discussed the option of waiting it out to see if I get more organised in time which will happen if it is "just" the OSA, or the optioon of taking medication which would be effective on the symptoms whether caused by OSA or ADD. I decided to go for the medication in a very low dose initially, will see how it goes this weekend. It won't interfere with the Effexor. He said my depression is well under control which is great. I can't always tell whether I'm depressed or not, because it "creeps up".

I get what you say about the coping strategies, Jen. I will continue to use them, they are making home much more pleasant. I am hoping the medication will augment the process of forming new habits, make it easier. Especially at work.

He says it doesn't sound like dementia, which is a relief.

There is a Spect scanning facility, which will be interesting, but expensive, and not of practical help at this stage.


Thanks all very much for your support.

Di

[Country4ever]

Hi Moby,

Maybe I asked you this before, so please forgive me if I'm repeating. Are you anywhere near perimenopause? Changing hormones can definitely cause these symptoms too.
What med is he putting you on?
Wow......2 years to work through the effects of OSA?
I can so relate to all your feelings. Hang in there.
P.S. You're not on a beta blocker are you? I can't believe how stupid that drug made me!
I couldn't even do simple mathematic problems. My thinking improved alot after getting off that drug.
I think any drug has the potential of affecting us in negative ways. And just because others on the drug don't have that certain symptom, doesn't me you can't.

[RosemaryB]

Wow, 2 years to get over the effects of OSA! That's a mixed blessing. On one hand, it means that some of the symptoms may decrease over time and you won't need the medications by then. That may be true of the depression, too. Did he say anything about that? On the other, there's always this hope that xpap therapy will get rid of all these things immediately, or within 6 months or so anyway.

[Moby]

Hi,

Country4ever, I think I'm past the menopause, though it's hard to tell as I had a hysterectomy. The hot flushes have stopped, and my mood is very stable.

I was on a beta blocker for a while, propranolol. It stopped my heart rate increasing which meant I could'nt exercise. I'm now on Karvea which seems to have no side effects.

As I say, we discussed whether or not to try medication, so it was a joint decision. I'm seeing how I go on 2.5 mg of dex. twice a day. I was able to concentrate all through my exercise class this morning which was good. Also felt like Superman, which might not be so good!!! Both he and the pharmacist gave me lots of education about the drug.

I've told my boss at work who has arranged some extra support for me on my next shift. He also told me I am too hard on myself.

Rosemary, The psych said I have no signs of depression at the moment, which is great. I'm beginning to be hopeful that in time I might come off the Effexor, though not yet, I don't want to implement too many changes at once.

The two years recovery time was an educated guess he made.

I should pay more attention to my signature! Things take time, time time!!!

Off now to my post-its! Thank you all for your support, I'll let you know how I get on.

Di

[Country4ever]

Moby.....I'm not real knowledgeable about all the antihypertensives, but I'm here to tell you that I got soooooooo confused on the beta blocker. It made my ADD so much worse. Thinking back, did your problems develop after you started the Karvea or the other BP med? I wouldn't rule it out as causing some of your problems.
I'm thinking that if an antihypertensive drug relaxes our vessels in order to lower the pressure, maybe it relaxes our brain vessels too much???
I had a drastic problem thinking on the beta blocker. I have chickens, and I count them every morning and every evening. It got so bad, I would stand there, and try to count them (16 of them), and couldn't do it! It would be too confusing for me. So please don't underestimate the affects that another medication can have on you.
I'm also curious if your hypertension started during perimenopause? Mine did. Now I'm finally in menopause, and its normal now. It can take years to really be in menopause. My perimenopause problems started 11 years ago, and they're finally subsiding. And just having your ovaries/uterus taken out doesn't solve all of the hormonal problems. Our hypothalamus and pituitary gland are also part of that "axis" that regulates our hormones. So you might still be having your thinking problems from hormones. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you that all this balances out for you.
Unfortunately......and I'm really feeling this myself.....our brains once we're in menopause are probably never as good as they used to be!

[Moby]

lol Countryforever! (re the brains)!

Thank you for being concerned and throwing out so many interesting thoughts. I really appreciate it. I do hope that one day not so far away I can do without all these pills. Sometimes I wonder how I would cope if civilisation ended tomorrow. Apart from no CPAP I wouldn't be able to see without my specs and I would be what...a depressed, hypertensive inattentive rather fat lady

Today has been very successful, I've sorted out some stuff to make life easier (like buying a purse to keep money in and a wristwatch with an alarm) and also been quite productive and had some fun too with my "doggie playgroup" pals.

I'm getting sleepy now.

Thank you for being there.

Di

[Country4ever]

LOL Moby.....I've wondered about that too.........especially when I had horrible migraines and couldn't function without my meds.
But....I think if this were during caveman times.........many of us (especially me) would have definitely been dinner for wooley mammoths.