OT -- Medical Terms Defined

[Goofproof]

TO: Medical Personnel FROM: Human Resources

It has come to our attention from several emergency rooms that many EMS
narratives have taken a decidedly creative direction lately. Effective
immediately, all members are to refrain from using slang and abbreviations to
describe patients, such as the following.

Cardiac patients should not be referred to with MUH (messed up heart), PBS (pretty bad shape), PCL (pre-code
looking) or HIBGIA (had it before, got it again). Stroke patients are NOT
"Charlie Carrots." Nor are rescuers to use CCFCCP (Coo Coo for Cocoa Puffs) to
describe their mental state. Trauma patients are not FDGB (fall down, go boom),
TBC (total body crunch) or "hamburger helper". Similarly, descriptions of a car
crash do not have to include phrases like "negative vehicle to vehicle
interface" or "terminal deceleration syndrome." HAZMAT teams are highly trained
professionals, not "glow worms." Persons with altered mental states as a result
of drug use are not considered "pharmaceutically gifted." Gunshot wounds to the
head are not "trans-occipital implants." The homeless are not "urban
outdoorsmen", nor is endotracheal intubation referred to as a "PVC Challenge".

And finally, do not refer to recently deceased persons as being "paws up," ART
(assuming room temperature), or CTD (circling the drain). I know you will all
join me in respecting the cultural diversity of our patients to include their
medical orientations in creating proper, narratives and log entries.

Sincerely, Director of Human Resources

[AdmiralCougar]

That is all...

Christy

[jennmary]

I just spit a very good shiraz all over my keyboard! Lucky it didnt come out of my nose. I love it! Funniest thing I have read in a long time.

[lilsheba]

I love it that was great....

[Pam]

still laughing, thank you