OK, This is from this guy's point of view. If I was really serious about someone and I wanted a more serious relationship, I would get to know them before I jump into bed with them. Once they get to know the real me, then I would tell them about OSA and educate them on it.
If they choose not to be with me, it's their choice. People have their own fears and some try to reflect on others.
Couple questions...
Heather,
I am also a female, age 22, that has just been diagnosed with OSA. I have been on CPAP for almost 3 weeks now. I am actually married (for 2.5 years now), and my husband has been very supportive. The first couple of nights I was on CPAP, I was very concerned that my husband would find me less attractive or that it would ruin the romance in our relationship. I cried the first night I had to use it, and I would only put my mask on after the lights had been shut off. As it turns out, I am making the CPAP into a much bigger deal than it actually is. The CPAP doesn't bother my husband at all. We still have plenty of cuddle time when we lay down. Once we begin to get really tired, I just go to my side of the bed and put on my mask, it's really no big deal. Since I started CPAP the only changes between my husband and I have been for the better. We also spend more "non-sleeping" time in bed now
I understand that you may be concerned about dating now that you are on CPAP. I think the main problem is that we, as women, find lots of things to be insecure about (weight, appearance, job, etc.) - CPAP is just another thing for us to be insecure about. I don't think it bothers anyone as much as we think it does. Personally, I would tell anyone you are dating about your sleep apnea when you are still fairly early in the relationship. If he freaks out, he was not a good guy and is not worth wasting any more time on. If he sticks around and is supportive, he may just be a keeper.
I am also a female, age 22, that has just been diagnosed with OSA. I have been on CPAP for almost 3 weeks now. I am actually married (for 2.5 years now), and my husband has been very supportive. The first couple of nights I was on CPAP, I was very concerned that my husband would find me less attractive or that it would ruin the romance in our relationship. I cried the first night I had to use it, and I would only put my mask on after the lights had been shut off. As it turns out, I am making the CPAP into a much bigger deal than it actually is. The CPAP doesn't bother my husband at all. We still have plenty of cuddle time when we lay down. Once we begin to get really tired, I just go to my side of the bed and put on my mask, it's really no big deal. Since I started CPAP the only changes between my husband and I have been for the better. We also spend more "non-sleeping" time in bed now
I understand that you may be concerned about dating now that you are on CPAP. I think the main problem is that we, as women, find lots of things to be insecure about (weight, appearance, job, etc.) - CPAP is just another thing for us to be insecure about. I don't think it bothers anyone as much as we think it does. Personally, I would tell anyone you are dating about your sleep apnea when you are still fairly early in the relationship. If he freaks out, he was not a good guy and is not worth wasting any more time on. If he sticks around and is supportive, he may just be a keeper.
-
sleepygirl65
- Posts: 3
- Joined: Mon May 16, 2005 11:50 am
Heather,
I agree with one of the previous comments-If a partner leaves you because of the mask, you don't need that kind of partner anyway.
It would be just a shallow relationship. Real love looks beyond the "shortcomings" if you want to call it that.
Your health is most important so keep taking care of yourself, and when the right person comes in your life, he'll love you and your machine!
I agree with one of the previous comments-If a partner leaves you because of the mask, you don't need that kind of partner anyway.
It would be just a shallow relationship. Real love looks beyond the "shortcomings" if you want to call it that.
Your health is most important so keep taking care of yourself, and when the right person comes in your life, he'll love you and your machine!
Sleepygirl
-
ahujudybear
- Posts: 354
- Joined: Mon May 23, 2005 10:12 am
- Location: Franklin, WI
Hi there...
We have been discussing this very same thing on another line, but in terms of braces (leg braces) and wasted limbs, etc.
Three of the gals decided that they might be getting old (over 50), and might be disabled (polio), but that they were still sexy and desirable and to prove it they each went out and bought a red thong! Then they started calling themselves the Red Thong Society. When they told us about it, about five more of us joined the group. We don't have to actually wear the thongs, just own them <LOL>..Now some of these gals are using wheelchairs, scooters or crutches and braces. Some have leg or arm or facial paralysis. Two were once in the running for Miss / Mrs. Wheelchair USA. We are of all types and appearances.
Sexy or attractive is definitely a state of mind, and what's more, if you feel that way, you will be more attractive to others as well.
- JB
We have been discussing this very same thing on another line, but in terms of braces (leg braces) and wasted limbs, etc.
Three of the gals decided that they might be getting old (over 50), and might be disabled (polio), but that they were still sexy and desirable and to prove it they each went out and bought a red thong! Then they started calling themselves the Red Thong Society. When they told us about it, about five more of us joined the group. We don't have to actually wear the thongs, just own them <LOL>..Now some of these gals are using wheelchairs, scooters or crutches and braces. Some have leg or arm or facial paralysis. Two were once in the running for Miss / Mrs. Wheelchair USA. We are of all types and appearances.
Sexy or attractive is definitely a state of mind, and what's more, if you feel that way, you will be more attractive to others as well.
- JB
Hey Ahujudybear, I totally agree that so much of this is a state of mind. Confidence is a wonderful aphrodisiac. I LOVE your story of the red thong women. As Snamvar indicates, loving ourselves is powerful. I always thought the comfort curve designer colors were stupid, but now I'm thinking that maybe a bunch of us need to get them in RED. We can be the Red Strap Society, confident, sexy, healthy and awake women and men wearing CPAP gear!!!
Dr Droopy
Dr Droopy