Humor: Honey, have you seen my CPAP? or mask?

IORHHI · Post by **IORHHI** » Mon Nov 20, 2006 1:58 pm

Honey, have you seen my CPAP?
Just a minute, I'm almost finished blowing out the radiator.

Timmy, have you seen my mask?
Wow, Mom, wait till you see the cool trick I figured out to keep the dog from chewing on his butt.

Hey! Where's my hose?
Hey Mom, come look at how you can fill the bathtub from the sink.

Like that. Now it's your turn.
Blessings,
Barbara

Julie · Post by **Julie** » Mon Nov 20, 2006 5:32 pm

Hey, those are funny! And cute. Can't trade you back any because I have none (my brain's too fogged but there is a man on the forum who routinely comes up with lots, so keep an eye out for him.

Bones · Post by **Bones** » Mon Nov 20, 2006 6:54 pm

Have you kids seen my heated humidifier?
Gee Dad, this things great for making Kraft Dinner!

Dear.....have you seen my cpap?
Look Honey....I added a water massage to our bathtub!

_________________

CPAPopedia Keywords Contained In This Post (Click For Definition): humidifier

Sadie · Post by **Sadie** » Mon Nov 20, 2006 7:43 pm

Honey, what's all this 'stuff' all over my full face mask? And WHY is the humidifier BOILING???

uhhhhhhhh hmmmm welll, I was having a WONDERFUL FACIAL this afternoon!

Say, why didn't you tell me you had that neat machine?!
You ALWAYS buy the neat stuff for yourself!!

Offerocker · Post by **Offerocker** » Mon Nov 20, 2006 7:48 pm

HEY DAD!!
Come here!
You oughta see how far this thing will shoot a ping-pong ball!

Yeah, kid........now, where's that darn cat?

"Daddy, Billy hid my goldfish three days ago, and won't tell me where they are!
Will you help me find 'em?"

Dad: ...barrffffffffff.

Hey, Sweetie, where did you find this neat room deodorizer?
It really works GREAT!

Sweetie: ?????????

Mile High Sleeper · Post by **Mile High Sleeper** » Tue Nov 21, 2006 12:29 pm

Julie and all,
the guy with regular humor is Mike Moran. Click on the yellow light bulb, expand all, section on CPAP humor; there are links to Mike's humor and more humor.
Enjoy!

Sadie · Post by **Sadie** » Tue Nov 21, 2006 12:45 pm

Mile High Sleeper wrote:Julie and all,
the guy with regular humor is Mike Moran. Click on the yellow light bulb, expand all, section on CPAP humor; there are links to Mike's humor and more humor.
Enjoy!

......and none of the above are "regular"?

Where is HE, anyway? Not up to this one, eh Mike? ...just teasing...

IORHHI · Post by **IORHHI** » Tue Nov 21, 2006 1:42 pm

Hey, sweetie, lookit how good this gets all the lint and bits of thread out of my sewing machine.
Sweetie: caff, cough, caff, gag, wheeze.

Hey Mom! Look how far I can shoot a marble thru this plastic thingie and hose!
How'd I get marbles in my humidifier?

Suzie, do you know where my mask and hose are?
Yeah, I'm going to be Horton in the school play, so I took it in to school.

I don't think I've heard of any restrictions on the number of people allowed to be funny here, carry on guys.
Blessings,
Barbara

Sadie · Post by **Sadie** » Tue Nov 21, 2006 3:28 pm

IORHHI wrote: <snip>
I don't think I've heard of any restrictions on the number of people allowed to be funny here, carry on guys.

Blessings,
Barbara

Barbara, maybe some of us are just funnier than others? I mean WE aren't funny, but we SAY funny things, or ......?

Anyway, I enjoy your sense of humor!!!

XPAP to Humidifier: "You'd better watch that water level, or I'll blow you away!"

Humidifier to XPAP: "You'd better watch that windy mouth of yours, or I'll short-circuit you in a NY minute!!"

Hose to XPAP and Humidifier: "You two had better shape up, or I'll have to separate you!!"

Mask to others: "I've ALREADY dealt with having a sleep test, a b&m DME, poor RT, runarounds with insurance company, and now YOU GUYS are getting into the act TOO!"

"Snap out of it, get your act together, and let me do MY job...or at least have MY turn at messing things up !"

mikemoran · Post by **mikemoran** » Tue Nov 21, 2006 4:38 pm

Definitely not regular LOL

Great stuff everyone. So let me give it an irregular try:

Oh honey what a suprise, you spray painted our bedroom.
Why is my humidifier pink?

Oh honey I really appreciate you putting on that see thru bra.
Now can you give me my Activa back so I can get some sleep.

(BTW jsut been tied up in work will be back visiting more often )

kteague · Post by **kteague** » Tue Nov 21, 2006 5:25 pm

Mom (from bedroom): Where is all my cpap stuff?

Daughter (from bathroom): It's in here, Mom - my hairdryer died. This thing worked great till I turned it up on high. Now my hair's all wet again.

Mom: Welcome to my world.

******

Spouse (reading travel magazine): Dear, have you decided yet where you'd like to go on our vacation?

CPAP Using Spouse: You know it's my dream to take a tropical vacation. I dream about it every night - I can almost feel the warm moist breeze upon my face...

******

CPAP User Reading Downloaded Data: I don't understand this. This leak rate makes no sense!

Spouse: What's wrong? It was working just fine earlier when I used it to dust under the bed.

******

Spouse: Baby, I like that new machine of yours. You hardly ever are tired or have a headache any more...

Cpap Spouse: Oh, No....... I knew there had to be a down side to this sooner or later.
(Just kidding of course!)

Offerocker · Post by **Offerocker** » Thu Nov 23, 2006 7:30 am

This idea is a result from another poster's comment.

Man who is using cpap and is looking for another 'hosehead'
He uses a new 'Opening Line;" "ARE YOU ON AIR?"

...well, you had to have been there

Deadmanwalking · Post by **Deadmanwalking** » Thu Nov 23, 2006 11:04 am

Ok True story, happened last tuesday night.
we have a little dog who hates air sounds. vacuum cleaner hair dryer etc.
She sleeps in bed with us and some time during the night last tuesday night I must have had an air leak at my mask. I woke up in pain to find she was trying to bite the air leak and go me right in the chest.
I thought it was kinda amusing. DMW

OwlCreekObserver · Post by **OwlCreekObserver** » Thu Nov 23, 2006 1:36 pm

He: Honey, did you move my CPAP machine?

She: Sorry, I left it in the bathroom. I had a really bad clog in the...sink.

OCO

Humor: Honey, have you seen my CPAP? or mask?

Humor: Honey, have you seen my CPAP? or mask?

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