CPAPtalk.com

Tase his butt... I'm coming over to your house... we'll visit him together!

Sheriff

Sheriff Buford wrote:Tase his butt... I'm coming over to your house... we'll visit him together!

Sheriff

Actually I sent the younger one out your way. He is visiting Kilgore, Tx right now.
Go get him and my sister while your at it.

There's always someone telling us we need to do something.

Lose weight. Exercise. Eat organic food. Eat more vegetables. Eat less red meet. Eat fewer carbs. Take these herbs. Get this medical test. Take these pills every day to lower blood pressure, raise this chemical in your blood. Sleep more.

Unfortunately, CPAP doesn't get properly tagged as to the magnitude of the certainty and severity of the problem.

It's sort of like the difference between "eat more fruit" and "don't drink and drive." Both are well meaning and true in some sense. One's a LOT more important.

I was so sure my husband was dying from unknown disease that hadn't been diagnosed yet so when we got the dx of OSA and that there was a treatment for it, I was relieved. It was certainly better than hearing that nothing could be done for him.

Reading the OP makes me think of this saying "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink"

bwexler wrote:I have two brothers in law who are diagnosed with sleep apnea and refuse to do anything about it.
One is age 58 and ~100 lbs overweight and refuses to do anything.
The other is age 78 and 10-20 lbs overweight with afib and COPD AHI 34. He actually brought his apap home and kept it in the trunk of his car until they told him to return it.
My sister also about 100 lbs overweight and snores is us diagnosed, but has many other problems and is about to start her second year of Medicare Advantage.

What type of cattle prod or bull whip do I need to convince them all to get serious about taking care of themselves?

Just read about a stubborn teen who was having problems getting started, made me think closer to home.

I am about 99% compliant.

Bwexler,

First of all, kudos to you for being concerned about your relatives. As someone who has so far not been able to adjust to pap therapy in spite of trying everything and who has had weight problems in the past (not currently), here is my perspective.

The brother-in-law who is 78 probably already feels overwhelmed with all his health issues, particularly at his age and feels like that because pap therapy will be a very difficult adjustment, doesn't see the point in trying. My mother definitely had undiagnosed apnea and in spite of her being extremely adaptable in other areas, I honestly think she would have had a very hard time wearing a mask on her face as she was quite hypersensitive. Could that be an issue with him?

Have you asked him what his concerns are? And if you haven't, maybe you want to do it and make sure you don't interject your feelings as hard as that may be. Perhaps, it might be an issue where you have to take extreme baby steps to get him to the point of being willing to wear the mask.

With your relatives who are extremely overweight, even though it may seem like they don't care, that may not be what is going on. Many people who are in their position have tried several times to lose weight only to fail since diets have a dismal failure rate.

Maybe if they simply focused on eating healthier and getting exercise and not focus so much on weight loss, that would be a better way to start? Maybe like the 78 year old brother-in-law, they need to take baby steps toward their goal?

Finally, I do agree with the last post that they have to take the steps to make the necessary changes and as frustrated as you are with the situation, there is nothing you can do about it to make them change if they don't want to.

Best of luck.

49er

Sadly, the "lose weight" broken record is all too familiar.
Most people who might be that "fluffy", already know how futile that is.
It's like telling someone, "You are dying--if you were Superman, you might have a tiny chance."
No doubt they are overwhelmed. Adjusting to cpap is a big unknown, some of us have done it easily,
others not so much (and STILL trying). The public image is sorely lacking.
Slap a mask on someone in a bed, and Hollywood has everyone convinced he's circling the drain.
Some of the newer mask designs show promise--less mask should be less daunting.

My sister and her husband went on a diet several years ago, goaded/guided by my aunt. They each lost 40 or 50 lbs. They got tired of weighing and measuring everything that went into their mouth and quit trying. My sister now keeps a large tub of imitation butter on the table and uses a table spoon to scoop it into almost everything she cooks. My wife yells at me if I eat anything at her house, "did you see what she put in that?".

I have led the horse to water, but some times I am tempted to drown them if they refuse to take a drink.
I have spent the last forty years slowly getting educated. I think I have a masters degree from the school of hard knocks. It is so frustrating when you see someone driving towards the washed out bridge and they refuse to pay attention when you tell them the bridge is gone.

So many of you say it so eloquently, yet it seems like we are mostly preaching to the choir.

49er wrote: With your relatives who are extremely overweight, even though it may seem like they don't care, that may not be what is going on. Many people who are in their position have tried several times to lose weight only to fail since diets have a dismal failure rate.

Maybe if they simply focused on eating healthier and getting exercise and not focus so much on weight loss, that would be a better way to start? Maybe like the 78 year old brother-in-law, they need to take baby steps toward their goal?


49er

Agreed... and FWIW, trying to lose 15/20 pounds has been more difficult than keeping a mask on my face. I enjoy food and I know all about leading a horse to water and the washed out bridge. When attempting to use the machine and/or eat healthfully, baby steps is the only way for the majority of us.