Zen of the Mask Recovery/Rebirth

General Discussion on any topic relating to CPAP and/or Sleep Apnea.
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carbonman
Posts: 2526
Joined: Wed Jun 25, 2008 7:57 am

Zen of the Mask Recovery/Rebirth

Post by carbonman » Sun Jul 19, 2009 4:51 pm

Zen-direct experiential realizations toward obtaining an awakening.
The practice to discover, through daily, or in this case, nightly,
experiences that will lead one to ultimate enlightment.

All things are brought to each of us, for a reason.
Why OSA???

In OSA therapy, the mask, is everything.

recovery
a regaining of something lost or stolen

rebirth
regeneration of something destroyed: the regeneration of something that has died or has been destroyed

Hard exercise does not build strength and endurance.
Hard exercise tears the muscle down.
Proper nutrition and rest build strength and endurance.

Silently, alone in the dark of the night, from deep in the abyss of my brain,it seeps out.
Quietly it flows throughout my body and I am recovered and
reborn.
HGH-human growth hormone. Secreted from the pituitary gland during REM sleep.

From the 5th morning, after 5 of the most horrific nights of my life,
I felt the first stirrings of the recovery/rebirth. I had just lived through the first
5 nights of cpap therapy.....and survived.
It wasn't much. Just a slight easing of the pain in my legs as I walked up the stairs at my work.
It was enough to convince me to keep trying.

8 days ago, ~2 miles from the summit of Vail pass, my rebirth was complete.
My mind, firmly in control. My body, begging to stop this madness.
Mind dictating to body, you're fine.
Today is our day.
Today we are reborn.
Today, through cpap, we are recovered.
In retrospect, the strongest ride of my life.

So, 1yr after starting cpap,
at the tender age of 58,
I am reborn.
What was stolen from me for years, has been found.
What was dying, has been rebuilt.

With every night of cpap, the horizon continues to stretch farther away,
the boundaries of my limits continue to expand.

Yin/Yang of life-
MY choice to embrace or reject, the mask, and in so doing,
chose quality of life.

I have chosen quality of life.
"If your therapy is improving your health but you're not doing anything
to see or feel those changes, you'll never know what you're capable of."
I said that.

jnk
Posts: 5787
Joined: Mon Jun 30, 2008 3:03 pm

Re: Zen of the Mask Recovery/Rebirth

Post by jnk » Sun Jul 19, 2009 4:58 pm

carbonman wrote: . . . I have chosen quality of life.
And have added to ours.

Thank you, Carbonman.

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Muse-Inc
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Location: Atlanta, GA

Re: Zen of the Mask Recovery/Rebirth

Post by Muse-Inc » Sun Jul 19, 2009 5:09 pm

lovely, strong, evocative, affirming...thank you for sharing your journey

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Mask: Hybrid Full Face CPAP Mask with Nasal Pillows and Headgear
Humidifier: HumidAire H4i™ Heated Humidifier
Additional Comments: Started Aug '07 CPAP Escape at 11 then 9, S9 APAP range 9.8-16, now 10-17
ResMed S9 range 9.8-17, RespCare Hybrid FFM
Never, never, never, never say never.

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DoriC
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Re: Zen of the Mask Recovery/Rebirth

Post by DoriC » Sun Jul 19, 2009 5:56 pm

Carbonman, your beautiful words reaffirm the reason we're all here. Thank you. Dori

_________________
Mask: Mirage Quattro™ Full Face CPAP Mask with Headgear
Humidifier: HumidAire H4i™ Heated Humidifier
Additional Comments: 14/8.4,PS=4, UMFF, 02@2L,
"Do or Do Not-There Is No Try"-"Yoda"
"We are what we repeatedly do,so excellence
is not an act but a habit"-"Aristotle"
DEAR HUBBY BEGAN CPAP 9/2/08

RipVW
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Re: Zen of the Mask Recovery/Rebirth

Post by RipVW » Sun Jul 19, 2009 6:00 pm

Whoa, Carbonman! You are quite the spinner of prose! So well said! Thanks for sharing this with us all.
Image
Check out my chinstrap--> http://cpapchinstraps.com
Image

katcw
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Joined: Mon Jun 29, 2009 6:26 am

Re: Zen of the Mask Recovery/Rebirth

Post by katcw » Sun Jul 19, 2009 6:14 pm

Wow! Thank you!

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Mr Bill
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Location: Grand Junction, CO

Re: Zen of the Mask Recovery/Rebirth

Post by Mr Bill » Wed Sep 14, 2011 10:47 pm

Thank you Carbonman. That was well worth reading.

_________________
Mask: EasyLife Nasal CPAP Mask with Headgear
Additional Comments: Devon Medical PC68B Recording Pulse Oximeter, APC Back-UPS RS 1500
EPAP min=6, EPAP max=15, PS min=3, PS max=12, Max Pressure=30, Backup Rate=8 bpm, Flex=0, Rise Time=1,
90% EPAP=7.0, Avg PS=4.0, Avg bpm 18.3, Avg Min vent 9.2 Lpm, Avg CA/OA/H/AHI = 0.1/0.1/2.1/2.3 ... updated 02/17/12

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Resister
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Re: Zen of the Mask Recovery/Rebirth

Post by Resister » Wed Sep 14, 2011 10:55 pm

That is super awesome--thanks for sharing! Love it!

Some of us can only come up with limericks....bad ones at that
~Mama is happy when she sleeps with Pap-py~

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Mr Bill
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Re: Zen of the Mask Recovery/Rebirth

Post by Mr Bill » Wed Sep 14, 2011 11:11 pm

I write poetry, mostly about sad things. Your talent to write positive things in prose is really nice.

_________________
Mask: EasyLife Nasal CPAP Mask with Headgear
Additional Comments: Devon Medical PC68B Recording Pulse Oximeter, APC Back-UPS RS 1500
EPAP min=6, EPAP max=15, PS min=3, PS max=12, Max Pressure=30, Backup Rate=8 bpm, Flex=0, Rise Time=1,
90% EPAP=7.0, Avg PS=4.0, Avg bpm 18.3, Avg Min vent 9.2 Lpm, Avg CA/OA/H/AHI = 0.1/0.1/2.1/2.3 ... updated 02/17/12

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cpax
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Re: Zen of the Mask Recovery/Rebirth

Post by cpax » Thu Sep 15, 2011 4:46 am

I printed this off and I read it before bed. I also was thinking of it while battling a panic attic last night. It's powerful stuff.

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Additional Comments: Mine actually says SleepStyle 200
I am who I am because of who we all are.

ThirdOutOfFive
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Location: St. Louis, MO

Re: Zen of the Mask Recovery/Rebirth

Post by ThirdOutOfFive » Thu Sep 15, 2011 9:29 pm

Thank you for sharing your gift. You are a true wordsmith.

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DoriC
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Location: NJ

Re: Zen of the Mask Recovery/Rebirth

Post by DoriC » Fri Sep 16, 2011 6:04 am

Cman, I'm so happy this is being read by those who are coming now. It inspired me then and makes me peaceful now.

_________________
Mask: Mirage Quattro™ Full Face CPAP Mask with Headgear
Humidifier: HumidAire H4i™ Heated Humidifier
Additional Comments: 14/8.4,PS=4, UMFF, 02@2L,
"Do or Do Not-There Is No Try"-"Yoda"
"We are what we repeatedly do,so excellence
is not an act but a habit"-"Aristotle"
DEAR HUBBY BEGAN CPAP 9/2/08