OT Terminal Melanoma
- Stormynights
- Posts: 2273
- Joined: Wed Mar 10, 2010 7:01 pm
- Location: Oklahoma
OT Terminal Melanoma
My husband has been battling Melanoma for a couple of years and found out Tuesday that it is terminal. The doctors said that he has a few months to a couple of years if the treatments work. It isn't Chemo but something else that isn't supposed to be as bad as Chemo. It has spread through his blood to his bones and liver. I have been trying to look up diets and useful information that might help him but my head is so foggy nothing will sink in. My heart is breaking. Does anyone know anything that might help. I don't need sympathy I need useful information. I don't mean to sound like a bitch but I am just having such a hard time with this.
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Last edited by Stormynights on Mon Aug 31, 2015 9:08 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Re: Terminal Melanoma
I saw this in the other thread, but want to repeat my sincere sorrow at this. I cannot begin to imagine how you must be feeling right now. Just know that you have friends here that will try to support you and help you through this.
Sending you mega {{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}
Again, I am so sorry.
Sending you mega {{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}
Again, I am so sorry.
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- Stormynights
- Posts: 2273
- Joined: Wed Mar 10, 2010 7:01 pm
- Location: Oklahoma
Re: Terminal Melanoma
Thank you so much for the hugs. You just can't have too many hugs. Hugs and prayers are always welcome.
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Re: Terminal Melanoma
Add my hugs to the many you will be getting.
Unfortunately that is about all the help I can offer at this time as I have zero ideas on what to do to actually help otherwise.
Unfortunately that is about all the help I can offer at this time as I have zero ideas on what to do to actually help otherwise.
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Re: Terminal Melanoma
I wish there was something we could do as well, but like Pugsy, I have zero ideas. I don't live anywhere near you to offer some IRL help and support.Pugsy wrote:Add my hugs to the many you will be getting.
Unfortunately that is about all the help I can offer at this time as I have zero ideas on what to do to actually help otherwise.
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Re: Terminal Melanoma
Stormynights wrote:I don't mean to sound like a bitch but I am just having such a hard time with this.
Check out Hammer Nutrition.
Created for endurance athletes. Good stuff.
Can all be used as a liquid.
My sister used it when solid food was not an option.
"If your therapy is improving your health but you're not doing anything
to see or feel those changes, you'll never know what you're capable of."
I said that.
to see or feel those changes, you'll never know what you're capable of."
I said that.
Re: Terminal Melanoma
Prayers. If you have specific nutrition questions, let me know as the wife is in the field and would be glad to help.
Best,
Mike
Best,
Mike
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Re: Terminal Melanoma
Just want to put in a tiny word - to be careful not to let 'want' overcome smarts - there are so many out there (not all in U.S. proper) who are willing to take your money and time because they know desperation can override sense... it's going to be hard to resist that kind of pull from 'alternative' sources, but you need to keep it in mind. FWIW a well known researcher/MD up here (who I knew) died a year+ ago from the same thing, and if there had been any magic answers he had the resources to pursue them, but knew better than to spend his remaining time and energy on chasing miracles.
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- BlackSpinner
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Re: Terminal Melanoma
{{{{Hugs}}}}
I don't any suggestions for nutrition other then get a certified dietitian involved, they know all the tricks and the resources. I worked with one after Mom stopped being able to handle regular food.
However please, please find support for yourself. You can't help him as much if you don't "Put on your oxygen mask first" ! Look for and join support groups, invest in some counseling now. Things sneak up on you, one day you think you are doing fine and then suddenly you are on the floor in tears and don't know who to call - don't allow that to happen, set up your life support system before hand.
I don't any suggestions for nutrition other then get a certified dietitian involved, they know all the tricks and the resources. I worked with one after Mom stopped being able to handle regular food.
However please, please find support for yourself. You can't help him as much if you don't "Put on your oxygen mask first" ! Look for and join support groups, invest in some counseling now. Things sneak up on you, one day you think you are doing fine and then suddenly you are on the floor in tears and don't know who to call - don't allow that to happen, set up your life support system before hand.
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71. The lame can ride on horseback, the one-handed drive cattle. The deaf, fight and be useful. To be blind is better than to be burnt on the pyre. No one gets good from a corpse. The Havamal
Re: Terminal Melanoma
So sorry to hear this.
How is he handling it?
Are you looking for a cure, or making his remaining time as pleasant as possible?
My advice:
Remember you don't have to figure everything out today. Handle what you can handle now. Realize that some decisions have no clear right and wrong choice, and don't get paralyzed and obsess over them.
Take care of yourself first. If you run yourself ragged, you'll drag him down, too. And you won't be able to do things when they are really needed. Don't let it get you down mentally. If you're feeling down, you'll get him down, too.
Easy to say. Hard to do.
There's lots of advice on technical details on the net. Also lots of bad advice, too. LOTS of bad advice.
What kind of help are you looking for from diets? Stuff that's easier for him to keep down? Stuff he'll eat to keep his weight up? Other than that, I doubt diet is going to help his progress much. Even if you believe in the benefits of the right diet or "miracle foods," they're not likely to make much difference over a short term.
Keep notes of what he eats and how it affects him. You might find some things help or hurt him in various ways. It will probably change over time. The changes can really sneak up on you.
I suspect that he'll lose his appetite at some point. It can become a battle to get him to eat, and a big emotional problem.
I'd be interested in the details or name of the "non-chemo" chemo therapy.
How is he handling it?
Are you looking for a cure, or making his remaining time as pleasant as possible?
My advice:
Remember you don't have to figure everything out today. Handle what you can handle now. Realize that some decisions have no clear right and wrong choice, and don't get paralyzed and obsess over them.
Take care of yourself first. If you run yourself ragged, you'll drag him down, too. And you won't be able to do things when they are really needed. Don't let it get you down mentally. If you're feeling down, you'll get him down, too.
Easy to say. Hard to do.
There's lots of advice on technical details on the net. Also lots of bad advice, too. LOTS of bad advice.
What kind of help are you looking for from diets? Stuff that's easier for him to keep down? Stuff he'll eat to keep his weight up? Other than that, I doubt diet is going to help his progress much. Even if you believe in the benefits of the right diet or "miracle foods," they're not likely to make much difference over a short term.
Keep notes of what he eats and how it affects him. You might find some things help or hurt him in various ways. It will probably change over time. The changes can really sneak up on you.
I suspect that he'll lose his appetite at some point. It can become a battle to get him to eat, and a big emotional problem.
I'd be interested in the details or name of the "non-chemo" chemo therapy.
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- Sir NoddinOff
- Posts: 4190
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Re: Terminal Melanoma
Sorry to hear about your crisis, Stormy. May you find some peace in the midst of all this turmoil.
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Re: Terminal Melanoma
Always sorry to hear of people getting this awful stuff. Be it known that prayers for your husband, you and your family are offered. Wishing you the best...
David
David
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Re: Terminal Melanoma
Really sorry to hear this. You have all my sympathy, I can only imagine what you must be going through. Makes every day so valuable, making the most of every moment becomes very important.
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Re: Terminal Melanoma
:HUGS: Stormy.
Get OSCAR
Accounts to put on the foe list: dataq1, clownbell, gearchange, lynninnj, mper!?, DreamDiver, Geer1, almostadoctor, sleepgeek, ajack, stom, mogy, D.H., They often post misleading, timewasting stuff.
Accounts to put on the foe list: dataq1, clownbell, gearchange, lynninnj, mper!?, DreamDiver, Geer1, almostadoctor, sleepgeek, ajack, stom, mogy, D.H., They often post misleading, timewasting stuff.
Re: Terminal Melanoma
My advise .... cherish every moment that you have left, do things that you both have wanted to do for years and best of all...... love greatly !!!!!!!!
Prayers and hugs are on the way Stormy. Chin up, smile on your face, and go give hubby all the hugs he can handle.
Cheers
Nan
Prayers and hugs are on the way Stormy. Chin up, smile on your face, and go give hubby all the hugs he can handle.
Cheers
Nan
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Started cpap in 2010.. still at it with great results.