Sleeprider wrote:What great progress! You can just see where he relaxes into the therapy and has a quiet couple hours. Well done. I wish I had done this for my dad who died of chronic heart failure. He was remarkably lucid, but his wife put him in a memory care unit. Supplemental oxygen couldn't overcome the apnea, and I was 1500 miles away and couldn't do much to help.
I hope you continue to do what you can to help your dad. Hopefully he will recognize the greater comfort, and this will help him. No fun to watch our parents go through this slow decline.
Tom
Thanks, Tom. No, it sure isn't any fun. When I first saw my dad recently, I was amazed at how much he now looked like his own father; the resemblance had always been there, of course, but seeing how frail and fragile he is at this point in life just screamed mortality and smacked me in the face. It was like being in a time machine, and my grandfather had magically reappeared.
I'm very glad I'm finally able to intervene in my dad's care (especially concerning his suspected apnea, which is the one condition I know something about thanks to this forum and my own years-long experience). It's definitely been on my radar for a long time now but, like you, living so far away from him made it virtually impossible for me to do anything about it, as I couldn't even count on my mother to be my ally.
So I'm taking full advantage of the fact that I'm here now and am able to bend my dad (and my mother) to my will. hehe I've gotten him to use the machine each day so far, and she's backed off a bit with the negativity. She and I duked it out the other day, and now she seems somewhat contrite. She hasn't apologized, of course, but she's quieter than normal. (I'll take that over the usual crummy attitude any day. )
Thanks for your support.
kteague wrote:Can't offer much in the way of suggestions, just wanted to say Hi and acknowledge how difficult it is to be the caregiver - even more so when family dynamics are such as you describe. Hope things fall into place without too much opposition.
Hi, Kathy, and thanks for your input (which is always welcome). Yep, it's a tricky family dynamic here but, as I said above to Tom, I'm glad to know I can apparently have my way with both of my parents and make them do what's right (eventually, anyway). My mother does seem to be acquiescing to me, as she can see that the attention I give to Dad is doing some good. I actually got Dad outside yesterday, which has been a bit of a battle, as his pride kept him from being seen in a wheelchair by anyone. He's able to walk around the house (with a walker); he just isn't as steady on his feet as I'd like. So him actually going for a walk in the neighborhood was out of the question; I just wanted to push him in the wheelchair. Thankfully, a little gentle prodding got him to agree to go out with me and the dog. It was just around the block, took about 20-30 minutes (we went slowly, as he held the dog's leash and the dog wanted to mark practically every shrub we passed), but he was *outside* and getting fresh air and sunshine. Made me feel really good to finally get there (after pleading with him quite a bit the last time I visited, to no avail). I intend to keep pushing him to go with me every day. Thanks for the encouragement.