Depression? attn Kaiasgram

General Discussion on any topic relating to CPAP and/or Sleep Apnea.
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karen773208
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Depression? attn Kaiasgram

Post by karen773208 » Tue May 26, 2015 8:49 am

Hello all! I'm new here. Started my CPAP therapy on May 16, 2015, so about 9 days ago. I've been doing really well with being compliant, and I've been sleeping good. The first morning I woke up with so much energy, it was almost scary. However, as last week moved along, I noticed that, while I was feeling more rested, I was feeling more and more depressed. Then this past weekend, Memorial Day, I basically sat at home and did nothing. I've been on low medication for depression for years, but this was totally not me!
Did any of you have any experience being depressed after starting therapy? If so, how long did it take before you weren't depressed anymore?
I'm thinking, what's the use of being rested if I'm so depressed I can't move?
Thanks for any help you can give me, Websites are appreciated too!!!

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Last edited by karen773208 on Tue May 26, 2015 12:02 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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andy88488
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Re: Depression?

Post by andy88488 » Tue May 26, 2015 8:58 am

karen773208 wrote:Hello all! I'm new here. Started my CPAP therapy on May 16, 2015, so about 9 days ago. I've been doing really well with being compliant, and I've been sleeping good. The first morning I woke up with so much energy, it was almost scary. However, as last week moved along, I noticed that, while I was feeling more rested, I was feeling more and more depressed. Then this past weekend, Memorial Day, I basically sat at home and did nothing. I've been on low medication for depression for years, but this was totally not me!
Did any of you have any experience being depressed after starting therapy? If so, how long did it take before you weren't depressed anymore?
I'm thinking, what's the use of being rested if I'm so depressed I can't move?
Thanks for any help you can give me, Websites are appreciated too!!!

Hi Karen,

Welcome, and congratulations on taking the first step on your journey. I've been dealing with depression for a long time. I can't say that CPAP has made it worse, but I also did not experience that dramatic improvement in restedness that you describe. I wish that I had.

My guess, and it is just a guess, is that your fogginess has been masking the issues that you really need to deal with. If you can't think straight, your thoughts won't be as troublesome, or they can be avoided. Are you seeing a therapist? My guess is that one would be helpful here. If not, I would think about what it is that is triggering your mood. What thoughts are you having? Job, relationship, life goals?

I would definitely encourage you to continue CPAP. My guess is that the clarity is letting you see issues that you have been avoiding dealing with. Don't blame the new glasses for what you see through them.

Hope that helps,

Andy
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Krelvin
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Re: Depression?

Post by Krelvin » Tue May 26, 2015 8:59 am

Please see a Dr. It is possible that with the extra rest you are getting that you might need to adjust your meds.
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karen773208
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Re: Depression?

Post by karen773208 » Tue May 26, 2015 9:23 am

Thanks...you may be right about the sleepiness masking things, and I like the quote about not blaming the glasses!
I used to have really vivid dreams, and used to be able to recall them in vivid detail. I am guessing this is from waking up all the time during them! Now the lack of remembering my dreams has left a kind of a hole in my day. It's almost a loss of something that made me interesting.
I read some other older posts that suggested that starting therapy is a lot like grieving. I can definitely see that.
I am looking for a therapist with experience in sleep disorders now, just to be sure!

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Re: Depression?

Post by BlackSpinner » Tue May 26, 2015 9:51 am

That was a good insight.
Start a journal of your journey- cpap means that sleep deprivation is gone but your body might need extra sleep for a while to rebuild and do a lot of house keeping. It also means like the others said that you can feel/see more clearly. Give your self permission to mourn those lost days and catch up on your sleep.

You are still dreaming and it is doing the housekeeping without being interrupted. I found that after a month or two my creativity came flying back in like it never had before. Those "dreams" are still there and will be so much more accessible in a while. You will be able to still your mind (without falling asleep!!!!!) and find them back.

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karen773208
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Re: Depression?

Post by karen773208 » Tue May 26, 2015 10:36 am

Thank you Blackspinner! I did start writing in my journal about it last night. One VERY good thing about the treatment...I'm not falling asleep at my desk anymore (like my Avatar shows!). It was a 2-3 time a day thing. I like the idea of my lost creativity coming back.
You all have been very helpful!

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Re: Depression?

Post by ChicagoGranny » Tue May 26, 2015 10:37 am

karen773208 wrote:Hello all! I'm new here. Started my CPAP therapy on May 16, 2015, so about 9 days ago.
As a newbie, you may not be aware that your CPAP therapy may not be fully effective due to machine settings that are not optimal or large mask leaks that partially invalidate the therapy.

What model machine and mask are you using? It is best to put it in your equipment profile so you don't have to answer the question again.

Are you following the efficacy data (AHI, leak) on your machine's display?

Are you aware that there is free machine software which prepares detailed reports to make sure your therapy is optimized?

I always recommend using data to make sure your CPAP therapy is working well. Plenty of people have chased other medical issues only to find out later that poor CPAP therapy was causing symptoms that confused diagnoses of other conditions.
karen773208 wrote:I've been on low medication for depression for years
Are you aware that untreated sleep apnea is a major cause of depression and anxiety and that doctors and therapists have commonly overlooked this issue?

With women, sleep apnea often starts or significantly worsens with pregnancy and/or at menopause. If your depression started at one of these times, it is likely that this was the onset of sleep apnea and it drove the depression.

Sleep-Disordered Breathing During Pregnancy - http://www.jabfm.org/content/22/2/158.full

Risk of Sleep Apnea Worsens After Menopause - http://www.webmd.com/sleep-disorders/ne ... -menopause

This may seem complicated right now, but the good news is that successful CPAP therapy can help you lead a very good life.

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Re: Depression?

Post by Chevie » Tue May 26, 2015 10:41 am

karen773208 wrote:One VERY good thing about the treatment...I'm not falling asleep at my desk anymore (like my Avatar shows!).
That is a good indication.

I also agree with Granny that every CPAPer should take advantage of the data available to make sure things are working well. It seems all the regulars here rely on data and most use Sleepyhead software.

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Re: Depression?

Post by Sir NoddinOff » Tue May 26, 2015 11:31 am

karen773208 wrote:Hello all! I'm new here. Started my CPAP therapy on May 16, 2015, so about 9 days ago. I've been doing really well with being compliant, and I've been sleeping good. The first morning I woke up with so much energy, it was almost scary. However, as last week moved along, I noticed that, while I was feeling more rested, I was feeling more and more depressed. Then this past weekend, Memorial Day, I basically sat at home and did nothing. I've been on low medication for depression for years, but this was totally not me!
Did any of you have any experience being depressed after starting therapy? If so, how long did it take before you weren't depressed anymore?
I'm thinking, what's the use of being rested if I'm so depressed I can't move?
Thanks for any help you can give me, Websites are appreciated too!!!
Hi Karen. Kaiasgram should come along soon and offer some advice. She's our resident expert on the mental challenges many of us face with CPAP therapy. Maybe put her name in the subject line to catch her eye (yes, you can change your subject line... just go to the your FIRST entry, click the 'edit' button and make the text change in the subject box at the top)

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Re: Depression?

Post by karen773208 » Tue May 26, 2015 12:02 pm

I have been using MyAir by resmed to track my sleep. My machine automatically updates it every day. It runs on a point system and I've been getting 90-99 out of 100 points every night except one. That was the night that I woke up in the morning laying on the hose!! lol
mask seal has been good, number of events has diminished. I added my equipment to my profile. I have no problem at all with the nose pillows. I fall asleep pretty quickly. It's great to be able to talk about all this!! I think I have been a little overwhelmed!

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Re: Depression?

Post by BlackSpinner » Tue May 26, 2015 12:02 pm

karen773208 wrote:Thank you Blackspinner! I did start writing in my journal about it last night. One VERY good thing about the treatment...I'm not falling asleep at my desk anymore (like my Avatar shows!). It was a 2-3 time a day thing. I like the idea of my lost creativity coming back.
You all have been very helpful!
I am also an artist so I can speak from experience that cpap therapy made a huge difference for me with regards to creativity.

My journal has helped me through many health issues. I can look back when I feel overwhelmed and see how far I have come. A lot of cpap based healing is subtle and you don't know the difference until you look back.

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kaiasgram
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Re: Depression? attn Kaiasgram

Post by kaiasgram » Tue May 26, 2015 2:10 pm

Hi Karen,

You've received a lot of good feedback already. A few more things to also consider:

With a history of depression you are of course more susceptible to it. And for some sensitive folks change -- even positive change -- can be kind of jarring and challenging. I don't know if your meds need to be re-evaluated at this time because it's early (only 9 days in) and generally one big change at a time is the best route to go. Journaling about how you're feeling and what you find yourself thinking about would be helpful, though, in the event these depression symptoms persist and you do need to consider a change in meds or dosage, or you simply want to track your own progress on this journey.

Related to the issue of change: We hear sometimes from newbies coming to the forum that the idea of being dependent on a machine for the ability to breathe at night is depressing to them. A more subtle version of this is simply that health changes and dealing with them remind us that we are vulnerable and mortal and our bodies can and do fail us, and dealing with these realities can be sobering and challenging. These issues are not so much in our everyday awareness (thankfully), but they come right up in our faces when we're actively dealing with a health issue. They could precipitate a depressive episode especially in sensitive or susceptible individuals. Fortunately they can be worked out with some time and support.

From a physiological perspective, your body with untreated sleep apnea got used to being in "fight or flight" mode, basically running on stress hormones. Now you don't need all those stress hormones but your body may not be so quick to "get it." There's a high correlation between depression and stress hormones. I lived in Nebraska for several years and while there I learned a saying from those folks who live in the windy midwest that I often share with clients who are struggling with change: "One day the wind stopped blowing and all the Nebraskans fell over." The body/psyche doesn't know what to do with all the stress hormones now and it's disorienting. The result -- a slump.

Only you know what issues might be coming up or even resurfacing during this adjustment period for you (past loss, stress or trauma, grieving time lost to an untreated health problem, lots of possibilities). You indicated that might be the case in an earlier response to someone. If you've had good experience with a therapist before, that's definitely a good first step and I'd say (without knowing you of course) that might be a better first step than looking at a change in meds because it may just be that your depression is a temporary phase of the whole adjustment process that you're now in.

One more thing for now -- if you decide to talk with a therapist, you really don't need to find a therapist who 'specializes' in sleep disorders. You just need a good therapist. The issues of health, change, unresolved issues from the past and grieving are more likely the focus of what you're going through than the specifics of your sleep apnea or cpap therapy.

Welcome to the forum.

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Re: Depression? attn Kaiasgram

Post by chunkyfrog » Tue May 26, 2015 2:20 pm

I kind of miss remembering my dreams, even some of the (milder) nightmares.
But certainly not the one involving demonic kittens and a pick-axe!

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Re: Depression? attn Kaiasgram

Post by jnk » Tue May 26, 2015 2:30 pm

You may have spent years being chased every night by the giant lion of sleep-disordered breathing. That wasn't good for you, but it may have tended to, uh, sort of keep your energy level up, in a panic-stricken sort of way. Once you have the tool to keep that lion away (effective CPAP therapy), your body may not have as much high-energy panic going on and wants to just sit and heal from the ordeal of the months/years of nightly bad breathing.

You may be able to get your energy level back up in a healthy way with a super-healthy diet and (upon approval by a doc) regular exercise program. Getting physical and out and about in the a.m. can be particularly good for you in resetting your inner clocks and letting the brain know who is boss now.

For me, CPAP got rid of a lot of negatives in my life as far as my health goes. But that merely allowed me to begin inserting some positives. CPAP doesn't necessarily make us healthier all on its own; for some of us, it just allows us the ability to get the leg up to start doing what we need to do in all other areas of life in a way that can make us steadily healthier and happier.

Just my opinion as some guy on the Internet.

-jeff

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Re: Depression? attn Kaiasgram

Post by kteague » Tue May 26, 2015 2:52 pm

I checked this thread just in case I might be of some help and found myself being helped. Good sound advice on all fronts and a treasure trove of illustrations and inspirations. I didn't think I was depressed but I sure feel better now than before I read this thread.

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