A Year of Blowing My Brains Out

General Discussion on any topic relating to CPAP and/or Sleep Apnea.
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A Year of Blowing My Brains Out

Post by mikemoran » Tue May 09, 2006 10:58 am

It seems like just yesterday when I was asking my Doctor: “You want me to stick what where?” “And you want me to do what with it every night?” “I’m really supposed to be able to sleep better with all this?” A model patient I clearly am not.

Thus I started on my air cushioned journey to nocturnal bliss. Along the way I learned some fascinating things. Such as pillows aren’t for resting your head on, but Marquis de Sade inspired devices to probe your nasal cavities with. Encasing your nose in silicon will never become a trendy fashion statement. Bedside appliances aren’t just for fun anymore and masks suck as much out of your wallet as they blow air in your nose.

Prior to treatment I thought mornings were to sleep through and afternoons were for drifting in fog. After spending years avoiding them I discovered things like sunrises. When you are alert, people actually expect you to be productive. I guess this is good for me, but meetings I sailed through now seem to take centuries to finish. Damn I even have to provide some input now.

Things started out rocky at first and my loving spouse made it her goal to make things even rockier. With all my excess energy she was bound and determined to ensure I didn’t put it to misuse. The Devil has to stand in line because she has lined up enough home improvements to keep these awake idle hands in her workshop for the next millennia. Just in case I was squirreling away a few ergs for fun, she had me enroll in a gym. The children, (or as I like to refer to them – Mom’s lackies), have been doing her dirty work too. Whoever thought up outdoor recreation as a fun time should be tarred and feathered.

So a year, fourteen masks and a third mortgage later, I seemed to finally have gotten the hang of this thing. I reduced nightly precipitation from a deluge to gentle misting. I went from 15 minutes intensive cleaning to 15 seconds with a baby wipe. I stopped using distilled water and switched to bottled. I know it builds up in the humidifier but those handy bottles make it so easy to fill it in the dark. After all the mask experimentation found that the third one I bought actually worked, and if you move it just right you can burp out the national anthem with it.

All in all I think its been pretty good for me, at least according to my wife. I do pine a bit for the good old days where those blank spaces made the day go much faster. It is pretty amazing to live whole day as a continuous movie instead multiple television shows with constant breaks. Now if only I can dissuade my cat from his amorous intentions towards my CPAP and cure the damn dog’s snoring. Doesn’t he know there are people trying to sleep around here.

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Post by krousseau » Tue May 09, 2006 11:23 am

I found 12 oz bottles of drinking water at the grocery store-got a pack of 12-poured the water in a glass-drank it-then refilled the bottles with distilled water. Refill them once every 12 days-takes less time than removing grit from the HH-and it's just the right amount to fill the HH.

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Faced with the choice between changing one's mind and proving that there is no need to do so, almost everyone gets busy on the proof.....Galbraith's Law

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Post by Wulfman » Tue May 09, 2006 11:35 am


Happy Anniversary!!!

And, THANKS for all of your humor!

Best wishes,


(my "anniversary" is coming up this Sunday)
(4) REMstar Autos w/C-Flex & (6) REMstar Pro 2 CPAPs w/C-Flex - Pressure Setting = 12 cm.
"Passover" Humidification - ResMed Ultra Mirage FF - Encore Pro w/Card Reader & MyEncore software - Chiroflow pillow
User since 05/14/05


Post by SLEEPYCD » Tue May 09, 2006 5:49 pm

Silly Man Moran,
HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Like Wulfman, my anniversary is coming up soon. Thanks for a year's worth of funnies and humorous insight!!!!!! I too have enjoyed the extra energy for yard/garden work, lifting weights, riding bike, walking, enjoying time with family and friends. I will be starting school this summer part-time and will enter the Certified Medical Assistant Program next year (can't wait). I will graduate at the ripe old age of 50 (but right now I'm feeling about 38!!!) Isn't life great???
One of the Few, the Proud and the Inflated!!!!!


Post by Guest-DSM » Tue May 09, 2006 10:25 pm


You are an inspiration in more ways than just your humor.

That book was inspirational.

Happy Anniv


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Post by Offerocker » Wed May 10, 2006 6:23 am

Last edited by Offerocker on Sat May 13, 2006 4:12 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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You made my day, month, week year maybe?

Post by pipsywiggins » Sat May 13, 2006 3:58 pm

I've printed your words for prosperity, I'm ill today so I don't feel that I can adequatly convey just how much they cheered me. I call it redemption quality, if you catch my drift.

Has anyone else here ever wondered if the moments that we take to encourage another will be enough for redemption? It just seems until becoeing ill we always think there will be plenty of time. Now my days of spearheading a convention of volunteers has passed and I'm left to delivering and receiving bits of encouragment now and then. That is what I meant saying that your words were redemtion quality , at least based upon my lackluster disposition today.
I came to respond to the posts I'd received and wound up reading others words again. I get one choice per day, I can write or read. So if you don't hear from me,it is not that I'm not here. I just chose reading today.
At any rate Mike, bless your oxygenated heart. Congratulations, also.


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Re: A Year of Blowing My Brains Out

Post by snoozie_suzy » Sat May 13, 2006 4:25 pm

[quote="mikemoran"] After all the mask experimentation found that the third one I bought actually worked, and if you move it just right you can burp out the national anthem with it.


I think I laughed/snorted on that comment Mike! It reminds me of when I use my UMFF mask, it makes quite embarrasing sounds!

Thanks for the humor, and congrats on your journey!


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Post by RedThunder94 » Sat May 13, 2006 6:20 pm

congrats on your journey to better sleep, i can't wait till i get past that milestone as well.

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Get Blown!


Post by Guest » Sat May 13, 2006 8:06 pm

Congratulations on your success!!! And on your wonderful way with words. Always look forward to your posts. Let's see what year # 2 will bring!

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Post by Bonnie » Sat May 13, 2006 8:23 pm

Nice to see you, Mike, Rather than wish you a happy anniversary may I congratulate you on 1 more year of life? And living that life so well! I still wear my "The Proud, The Few, The Inflated" sweatshirt with tongue in cheek and will gladly answer anyone who asks..."Huh?"

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"People who say they slept like a baby apparently never had one"

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Post by Sleepless on LI » Sun May 14, 2006 4:46 pm


It was so nice seeing your name back up on the boards, with another infusion of your great humor. It's always a pleasure.

Happy Anniversary. I am joining you, too, this month (though I did take two months off last fall). Hope your book is selling off the shelves.

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L o R i