Crazy making

[Janknitz]

So hubby is having trouble sleeping. He does snore a little and gets up about once a night. And he's terribly impatient. If he doesn't fall asleep right away he starts FUMING. He gets up, takes a Trazadone. If he's not asleep in FIVE minutes, he gets up, takes another. This goes on. One night he admitted to taking FIVE. I told him I'm taking the bottle away from him if he ever does that again.

When he perceives he can't sleep he curses, yanks the covers (off me), storms into the bathroom. Rinse, repeat. Not pleasant on those bad nights. He is usually sweet and mild mannered, and he is retired so he doesn't have to be anywhere in the morning, so this is out of character for him.

He is getting up to urinate at least once a night, so it's plausible that he has since developed OSA.

He finally asked his doctor for help. Got a Kaiser referral that he thought was for the "sleep doctor: but turned out to be a group for fitting a CPAP. HUH??? He was tested in 2014 and told that he didn't need one. Today they said "yes, you do" based on the 2014 test, "but too bad, your ACA Kaiser plan doesn't cover the machine. Out of luck, Chuck". (The plan we had in 2014 had full coverage )

I remember him showing me the results in 2014, and I don't remember that they seemed like he needed treatment--and they told him he did not. I think they are full of $#@!. He MAY have OSA NOW, but I don't think he did THEN. And they need to re-test him (which I'm pretty sure IS covered). I can fix him up with my old machine if he needs it, and we can look for a better used machine for long term. But he needs testing after 3 years. They are playing stupid Kaiser games.

He is going to see the actual pulmonologist tomorrow supposedly (In 7 years of OSA treatment AND severe asthma, I've never seen the pulmonologist!) and I told him NOT to leave without the full 8 page PSG report from 2014.

In between he's had some cognitive issues--I think mostly because he had some bad chronic pain due to a neck injury--that's mostly resolved now. But I am going after them with a stick if he really has had OSA all this time and they delayed treatment for three years.

I can deal with the OSA if that's what he has (and it's possible he does). I still have my old machine to titrate him and a bunch of masks he can try. We can get him newer stuff.

But he really needs an evaluation of his sleep and sleeping issues, it may also have NOTHING to do with OSA. I guess we'll see if Kaiser can manage that.

[greatunclebill]

see if kaiser tested him for restless leg. that would have the same effect as sleep apnea.

[Janknitz]

see if kaiser tested him for restless leg. that would have the same effect as sleep apnea.

They didn't, they did the usual WatchPat home test. But I sleep (or not) next to him every night, so I'd know if he had RLS. He does not. He changes positions a few times a night (usually yanking the covers off me in the process), but his legs are still. I wake up some mornings clinging tightly to the very edge of the quilt or I'd have nothing covering me. On his side, the quilt is puddled to the floor.

He is a very light sleeper--always has been. I don't sleep all that great myself, and if I turn over, he wakes too (not fully), turns over, groans and goes back to sleep (since I have to fix the mask leaks, I wake up fully every time I need to turn over). He tracks his sleep with a fitbit and you can pretty much see every time I wake up because my movement makes him almost wake fully too, and it shows up in his fitbit tracking. He doesn't realize that I'm the reason for him coming out of deeper sleep a few times a night. Now he is coming fully awake about the same time as my nightly hot flash. Maybe we BOTH should see the sleep doctor!

It's the times he can't get to sleep in the first place, or can't get back to sleep that are really bothering him--and by extension, me!

[jnk...]

I consider response to therapy to mean more than anything. If PAP helps someone get better sleep, I couldn't care less about the rest. The primary benefit to diagnosis is getting a payer to pay for the trial of PAP. That can happen without testing, in this case, seems to me. If sleep troubles remain, then look beyond PAP. If the problems go away after PAP, then there is benefit in using it regardless of what medical terms one attaches to that fact.

Anxiety, mood, cognition, personality, sleep maintenance all can relate to issues beyond the physical, but hopefully something as simple and mechanical and easily treated as sleep-breathing turns out to be the root cause.

[Janknitz]

Good points, jnk. I’ll see if he’s open to it after talking to the pulmonologist.

[Grace~~~]

I'll leave the sleep study advice to the experts, but could you put a little table or chair up next to your side of the bed with an extra blanket? I hate to think of you waking up shivering.

[MaxINTJ]

Sounds like he has more issues than SDB.... insomnia of some sort for sure.

Has he cleaned up his sleep hygiene? From what you describe, he may see some benefit from following the CBT-I recommendations.

Just my $0.02

[chunkyfrog]

. . . yanking the covers off me in the process), but his legs are still. I wake up some mornings clinging tightly to the very edge of the quilt or I'd have nothing covering me. On his side, the quilt is puddled to the floor. . . .

Get your own quilt; I need to dig out my small quilt, which I can wrap around me, burrito style,
so he can't steal it

[jnk...]

As long as the burrito blanket matches the modified petite biker bandana for bulkier hair.

[chunkyfrog]

Picture, if you will . . .

[jnk...]

Hey, we're all family here.

Besides, fashion statements don't matter in the dark.

[Lucyhere]

Um... for starters anyway... a new bed? Maybe a sleep number which you can adjust so you don't sense when the other person moves? Pricey, but maybe worth it. Also, and we do this, we each have our very own comforter. Makes making the bed more difficult... but who makes the beds anyway?

[jnk...]

... but who makes the beds anyway?

Ooooh. Oooh. I think I know the answer to this one:

The wife?

*runs and hides before he gets punched *

[Lucyhere]

... but who makes the beds anyway?

Ooooh. Oooh. I think I know the answer to this one:

The wife?

*runs and hides before he gets punched *

POW (But, damn... you're right.)

[jnk...]

I try to make the bed sometimes. I do it just badly enough that she has to remake it anyway.

And you got a pretty good punch on you there, Lucyhere.