Behavior in this Forum

[postitnote]

And btw, if Morbious sees this, 2 days ago I found a groundhog living in our yard. It's so cute and fluffy! I hope it's a boy so we don't have babies. It made a burrow next to the garage that's about 10 feet long. He comes out if I call "kitty, kitty". He plays nicely with the birds, squirrels, and bunnies. Can't wait till next groundhog day to get a really local weather forecast!

I have a garden.

Whenever I see a woodchuck I spear it with a pitchfork.

Want a chuckskin cap?

It would go great with that mink I inherited from an aunt! Are they really destructive?

[palerider]

And btw, if Morbious sees this, 2 days ago I found a groundhog living in our yard. It's so cute and fluffy! I hope it's a boy so we don't have babies. It made a burrow next to the garage that's about 10 feet long. He comes out if I call "kitty, kitty". He plays nicely with the birds, squirrels, and bunnies. Can't wait till next groundhog day to get a really local weather forecast!

I have a garden.

Whenever I see a woodchuck I spear it with a pitchfork.

Want a chuckskin cap?

It would go great with that mink I inherited from an aunt! Are they really destructive?

didn't you see caddy shack??? oh, wait, I guess most of the destruction WAS Bill Murray...

[Morbius]

And btw, if Morbious sees this, 2 days ago I found a groundhog living in our yard. It's so cute and fluffy! I hope it's a boy so we don't have babies. It made a burrow next to the garage that's about 10 feet long. He comes out if I call "kitty, kitty". He plays nicely with the birds, squirrels, and bunnies. Can't wait till next groundhog day to get a really local weather forecast!

I have a garden.

Whenever I see a woodchuck I spear it with a pitchfork.

Want a chuckskin cap?

It would go great with that mink I inherited from an aunt! Are they really destructive?

One guy will wipe out a whole row of beans in a single forage.

[mgaggie]

I've thought long and hard about how/if I would reply to this thread.

Robysue, thank you for explaining Echanter's situation. I don't know many people who are on the autism spectrum, so didn't pick up on 'cues' in his posting. Although some of his behavior still hasn't been nice, and I don't think ANYONE should get away with plain rudeness because they have AS.

I know that I am perceived as a grumpy, rude, person and sometimes I am. I think part of it is cultural. Here in Australia, we tell you how we see it. If you are acting like a 'richard cranium' we will tell you that and we'll also tell you to stop! One thing I cannot stand is people who I admire and respect receiving rudeness when they are trying to help. My hackles immediately rise and I'll rush in to give the rude person a piece of my mind. I can't hand hold and namby pamby to anyone, I was brought up the "suck it up and deal with it" way for most things. My opinion is, sure have a whine every now and again, but take on board any advice given, not throw it back in the face of the giver.

I come to this board because I know I'll get an honest opinion, and the help and advice I've received here has been fantastic. Better than the stupid sleep clinic that I pay to help me. I will try and help anyone I can if they come here asking for help, usually someone who has much more knowledge than me gets in first, so I'll keep quiet.

[Morbius]

Want a chuckskin cap?

It would go great with that mink I inherited from an aunt!

OK, that one I flattened with shovel. Not a lot left. Maybe something you could make a potholder with.

I shall try to change my methodology.

[SleepWrangler]

Robysue, thank you for explaining Echanter's situation. I don't know many people who are on the autism spectrum, so didn't pick up on 'cues' in his posting. Although some of his behavior still hasn't been nice, and I don't think ANYONE should get away with plain rudeness because they have AS.

Forum posts, e-mail, twitter are tricky because it''s so difficult to pick up on social context. These forms of communication make everyone a bit more autistic because we can easily find ourselves saying and doing the wrong thing with the best of intentions. Even so, the correct behavior is not to escalate rudeness particularly when one or both sides of the dialog may truly have an autism spectrum disorder. Denigrating someone with autism is not a unique occurrence in this forum.

[Julie]

I think we might just be rushing to judgment... it has certainly not been proven or even 'admitted' to by Enchanter as far as I know that he has any level of autism, Aspberger's, etc., only that he's caught up in a high anxiety cycle at the moment and has had some psychological problems in the past (as have many of us I'm sure), but it feels like some people think the autism is a done deal, and therefore the cause of (and reason to forgive) his speeding and loss of control with his questions, etc, though he seems a lot more relaxed and in control over the past few days, which is great.

So, maybe leave the diagnosing to his doctor, etc. and don't spread any hard and fast ideas yet... we obviously don't know what's really going on ourselves, though 1-2 professionals here have done a great job of getting him calmed down. Let's just wait and see where it all goes for now.

[Goofproof]

And btw, if Morbious sees this, 2 days ago I found a groundhog living in our yard. It's so cute and fluffy! I hope it's a boy so we don't have babies. It made a burrow next to the garage that's about 10 feet long. He comes out if I call "kitty, kitty". He plays nicely with the birds, squirrels, and bunnies. Can't wait till next groundhog day to get a really local weather forecast!

I have a garden.

Whenever I see a woodchuck I spear it with a pitchfork.

Want a chuckskin cap?

It would go great with that mink I inherited from an aunt! Are they really destructive?

S
didn't you see caddy shack??? oh, wait, I guess most of the destruction WAS Bill Murray...

Don't you know the difference between a groundhog and a gopher? My guess is NOT! Jim

[robysue]

I know that I am perceived as a grumpy, rude, person and sometimes I am. I think part of it is cultural. Here in Australia, we tell you how we see it. If you are acting like a 'richard cranium' we will tell you that and we'll also tell you to stop! One thing I cannot stand is people who I admire and respect receiving rudeness when they are trying to help. My hackles immediately rise and I'll rush in to give the rude person a piece of my mind.

Personally I have no problems with this. In other words, it's fine to respond to a rude person by whacking the rude person upside the head with a 2x4. My own cultural background is American Southern and we're great at whacking rude people upside the head with 2x4's while still smiling at them and saying such things as "Are you sure you want to be whacked again with that 2x4? 'Cause it seems to me like you should have learned your lesson by now." And the best of the Southerners can call you "hon" or "sweetie" while they're repeatedly whacking you upside the head with that 2x4.

But responding to a very rude poster has to be done in a way that does NOT escalate the situation and start an all out flame war. It's not ok to respond with significant name calling that does nothing but add fuel to the fire in my opinion. And it's not ok to start throwing F-bombs around just because someone has been rude to you (or someone else) for that matter.

In other words, a "How dare you act that way?" post beats a "You're a stupid asshole for attacking the people who are trying to help you" post hands down.

[postitnote]

didn't you see caddy shack??? oh, wait, I guess most of the destruction WAS Bill Murray...

I didn't see it. I missed a whole decade of movies!

One guy will wipe out a whole row of beans in a single forage.

It will burrow under a fence?

Don't you know the difference between a groundhog and a gopher? My guess is NOT! Jim

I could post a video I took yesterday when I was so excited because I thought I had a beaver in the yard! Wasn't till I saw the tail that I realized it wasn't flat. Then I thought I had a ginormous rat with a fuzzy tail. Googled and was relieved it was a groundhog/woodchuck. It's really cute!

[robysue]

I think we might just be rushing to judgment... it has certainly not been proven or even 'admitted' to by Enchanter as far as I know that he has any level of autism, Aspberger's, etc., only that he's caught up in a high anxiety cycle at the moment and has had some psychological problems in the past (as have many of us I'm sure), but it feels like some people think the autism is a done deal, and therefore the cause of (and reason to forgive) his speeding and loss of control with his questions, etc, though he seems a lot more relaxed and in control over the past few days, which is great.

I think different posts are getting confused and "combined" here.

Enchanter has never said anything at all about Asperger's and autism. He has said he has anxiety and I've observed that he has traits similar to my ADHD brother and my OCD cousin.

But back on the bottom of page 1 of this thread palerider made a comment about a roommate acting like Sheldon from the Big Bang Theory and used the word aspergers in his post. And on the top of page 2, Elle misinterpreted palerider's comment as mocking people with Asperger's and made a pretty nasty personal attack on palerider. And we were off to the flame wars ...

The thread settled back down to the main topic when Madalot made this post at the bottom of page 2: viewtopic.php?f=1&t=105490&st=0&sk=t&sd=a&start=15

It's not a surprise that if someone is reading quickly or simply skimming through this thread, that these two separate parts of the thread might be mixed together in someone's mind.

[palerider]

Don't you know the difference between a groundhog and a gopher? My guess is NOT! Jim

well, you see, I was just figuring that they'd probably cause similar damage... and I don't remember that the groundhog in the movie, also with bill murray, did all that much damage

[cancun]

I know that I am perceived as a grumpy, rude, person and sometimes I am. I think part of it is cultural. Here in Australia, we tell you how we see it. If you are acting like a 'richard cranium' we will tell you that and we'll also tell you to stop! One thing I cannot stand is people who I admire and respect receiving rudeness when they are trying to help. My hackles immediately rise and I'll rush in to give the rude person a piece of my mind.

Personally I have no problems with this. In other words, it's fine to respond to a rude person by whacking the rude person upside the head with a 2x4. My own cultural background is American Southern and we're great at whacking rude people upside the head with 2x4's while still smiling at them and saying such things as "Are you sure you want to be whacked again with that 2x4? 'Cause it seems to me like you should have learned your lesson by now." And the best of the Southerners can call you "hon" or "sweetie" while they're repeatedly whacking you upside the head with that 2x4.

But responding to a very rude poster has to be done in a way that does NOT escalate the situation and start an all out flame war. It's not ok to respond with significant name calling that does nothing but add fuel to the fire in my opinion. And it's not ok to start throwing F-bombs around just because someone has been rude to you (or someone else) for that matter.

In other words, a "How dare you act that way?" post beats a "You're a stupid asshole for attacking the people who are trying to help you" post hands down.

and here I thought Southerner's just said "why bless your heart!"

[Julie]

I said what I did when Morbius and Sleep Wrangler alluded to Enchanter being autistic as if it were definite... was not referring ot the earlier stuff.

[poppi2]

. . . and here I thought Southerner's just said "why bless your heart!"

More like, "y'all can kiss ma grits".