I think I am going to die

[Admiral_Schmidlap]

It's been a few weeks since I posted here. I tried using the CPAP for a few nights but just couldn't get use to it. So i gave up, after only 4 nights. I then totally changed my diet and started going back to the gym. I have lost about 20 lbs so far. Thought I was doing great. Tried to go to bed last night and all I can think about is suffocating in my sleep. I was fine the night before. It's 6:45 a.m. here and I just tried again. As soon as I felt myself drift off those thoughts came back. I am so scared right now and don't know what to do. My chest feels all tight and I just want to scream or cry. Why is this happenning to me.

[littlebaddow]

Admiral, you're not alone, as much as it feels like you are.
Those sort of feelings are very common and understandable.
Brilliant progress on weight loss and exercise, please keep it up.
Please also persevere with the cpap. Many of us have been through despair and come out the other side feeling much better.
Keep going and keep talking to us and others.
All the best

[49er]

It's been a few weeks since I posted here. I tried using the CPAP for a few nights but just couldn't get use to it. So i gave up, after only 4 nights. I then totally changed my diet and started going back to the gym. I have lost about 20 lbs so far. Thought I was doing great. Tried to go to bed last night and all I can think about is suffocating in my sleep. I was fine the night before. It's 6:45 a.m. here and I just tried again. As soon as I felt myself drift off those thoughts came back. I am so scared right now and don't know what to do. My chest feels all tight and I just want to scream or cry. Why is this happenning to me.

Hi Admiral,

I have been struggling alot longer with cpap usage than you so please don't feel bad. It takes time to work out the kinks. For some of us, it takes even longer

It is ok to be scared. Just use it in a positive manner and do whatever is necessary to make your cpap treatment work. You may be like me in that you need extra time to sort out the issues.

Anyway, please refresh my memory about what you couldn't get used to the machine.

49er

PS - Congratulations on your weight loss. You are inspiring me as I have gained about ten pounds i need to lose.

[Admiral_Schmidlap]

It's been a few weeks since I posted here. I tried using the CPAP for a few nights but just couldn't get use to it. So i gave up, after only 4 nights. I then totally changed my diet and started going back to the gym. I have lost about 20 lbs so far. Thought I was doing great. Tried to go to bed last night and all I can think about is suffocating in my sleep. I was fine the night before. It's 6:45 a.m. here and I just tried again. As soon as I felt myself drift off those thoughts came back. I am so scared right now and don't know what to do. My chest feels all tight and I just want to scream or cry. Why is this happenning to me.

Hi Admiral,

I have been struggling alot longer with cpap usage than you so please don't feel bad. It takes time to work out the kinks. For some of us, it takes even longer

It is ok to be scared. Just use it in a positive manner and do whatever is necessary to make your cpap treatment work. You may be like me in that you need extra time to sort out the issues.

Anyway, please refresh my memory about what you couldn't get used to the machine.

49er

PS - Congratulations on your weight loss. You are inspiring me as I have gained about ten pounds i need to lose.

Hi 49'er,
I was using th Swift FX Nasal Pillows. I have a severly deviated septum and one nostril is almost always blocked. So I went to see the respitory therapist a few days ago and got a new full face mask. I have yet to try it though. I figured if I could just lose the weight the Sleep Apnea would go away.

[zoocrewphoto]

It's been a few weeks since I posted here. I tried using the CPAP for a few nights but just couldn't get use to it. So i gave up, after only 4 nights. I then totally changed my diet and started going back to the gym. I have lost about 20 lbs so far. Thought I was doing great. Tried to go to bed last night and all I can think about is suffocating in my sleep. I was fine the night before. It's 6:45 a.m. here and I just tried again. As soon as I felt myself drift off those thoughts came back. I am so scared right now and don't know what to do. My chest feels all tight and I just want to scream or cry. Why is this happenning to me.

I think I am understanding correctly that you are not trying to use the machine right now, correct? If so, then you may be having dreams or feeling like you are suffocating because you are experiencing apneas. Before cpap treatment or during a night when I have taken off my mask, I will dream about not being able to breathe. Sometimes I am being chased, so I am out of breath. Sometimes, I could be drowning, or I may even dream that I can't plug my machine in.

If I am incorrect, and you are trying to use your machine right now, it may be set to start at a lower pressure or ramp from a lower pressure. Most people feel like they are suffocating if it is at only 4 or 5. Some people still struggle at 6 or 7. I had to turn off my ramp after a couple days because it was too low for me. It was much easier to let it go straight to me prescription pressure of 11 (mine goes up to 17, but usually stays in the 11-13 range).

Please keep posting and let us know each individual thing you are struggling with so that we can help you get through it.

[Admiral_Schmidlap]

It's been a few weeks since I posted here. I tried using the CPAP for a few nights but just couldn't get use to it. So i gave up, after only 4 nights. I then totally changed my diet and started going back to the gym. I have lost about 20 lbs so far. Thought I was doing great. Tried to go to bed last night and all I can think about is suffocating in my sleep. I was fine the night before. It's 6:45 a.m. here and I just tried again. As soon as I felt myself drift off those thoughts came back. I am so scared right now and don't know what to do. My chest feels all tight and I just want to scream or cry. Why is this happenning to me.

I think I am understanding correctly that you are not trying to use the machine right now, correct? If so, then you may be having dreams or feeling like you are suffocating because you are experiencing apneas. Before cpap treatment or during a night when I have taken off my mask, I will dream about not being able to breathe. Sometimes I am being chased, so I am out of breath. Sometimes, I could be drowning, or I may even dream that I can't plug my machine in.

If I am incorrect, and you are trying to use your machine right now, it may be set to start at a lower pressure or ramp from a lower pressure. Most people feel like they are suffocating if it is at only 4 or 5. Some people still struggle at 6 or 7. I had to turn off my ramp after a couple days because it was too low for me. It was much easier to let it go straight to me prescription pressure of 11 (mine goes up to 17, but usually stays in the 11-13 range).

Please keep posting and let us know each individual thing you are struggling with so that we can help you get through it.

Hi zoocrewphoto,
You are correct, I am not using the machine at this time. As I tried to go to sleep last night I got this flash of heading into a dark tunnel. It set me off for the rest of the night to the point where I felt like I was having a panic attack. The night before I was able to go to bed without any of these thoughts, yet for some reason this night I am having them. I am in a cycle now where I have 3 to 4 nights when I can fall asleep and then a bad night where I can not fall asleep and end up being awake for 24 to 36 hours taking small 10 to 15 minute naps through out the day. I am going to try using the CPAP again as I do not know what else to do.

[Admiral_Schmidlap]

Admiral, you're not alone, as much as it feels like you are.
Those sort of feelings are very common and understandable.
Brilliant progress on weight loss and exercise, please keep it up.
Please also persevere with the cpap. Many of us have been through despair and come out the other side feeling much better.
Keep going and keep talking to us and others.
All the best

Hi littlebaddow,
Thanks for the words of encouragement, I really need them and it is much appreciated.

[49er]

Hi 49'er,
I was using th Swift FX Nasal Pillows. I have a severly deviated septum and one nostril is almost always blocked. So I went to see the respitory therapist a few days ago and got a new full face mask. I hav]e yet to try it though. I figured if I could just lose the weight the Sleep Apnea would go away

Thanks Admiral.

Good luck with using the mask. And if it doesn't work, keep trying them until you find one that does.

49er

[ChicagoGranny]

I am going to try using the CPAP again as I do not know what else to do.

Well that is the right thing to do, except don't try, instead make a firm commitment.

If you sleep any without CPAP make sure you do not sleep on your back. Wear a backpack, have a pillow behind you or put tennis balls in the back of your shirt - anything to keep off your back. This helps reduce the severity of apnea in some people.

Be very careful about your workouts. Keep them at a moderate level or lower. Your body is already under a great stress at night and additional stress at the gym could cause a big problem.

Zoo is right about using a lower pressure to get acclimated to sleeping with a mask. Did you say what your pressure is?

"Passing through the birth canal" of CPAP can be rough but you are at the beginning of a better life. Make that commitment.

Hope to see additional posts charting your progress,

[SleepyToo2]

Admiral, it really does sound as though you _need_ to be using CPAP, so congratulations on finding the courage to ask! That is always step 1. Also, congratulations on losing the weight. Unfortunately, there is no guarantee that losing it will "cure" your apnea. Apnea is a result of muscles in the throat area getting slack or turning to fat as we age (even from a very early age!), and it is very hard to correct that. Surgery may help for a while, but the muscles/fat often return and in some cases with a vengeance. Spend some time reading on the forum about surgery, weight loss, and exercises for the throat. Also look up "deviated septum" because there are a lot of members have that problem.

Now, practical things. It sounds like the mask you had may not be right for you. With the new one, practice putting it on (not connected to the machine) while you are awake. Get used to how it feels on your face, and breathing through it. It is different. Then, still wearing the mask, connect it to the machine and turn the machine on - switch it on quickly so that you get the air soon. If you have the ramp facility turned on, make sure that it starts at at least 6 cm water. Many people, if not most, struggle with less than that. As the pressure rises, make any adjustments to the straps that you need to make to stop leaks (think not too tight, not too loose, Goldilocks). After you get used to how it feels, just relax, read a book/watch TV (if you can with your particular mask) for an hour or so. You will find you get used to it. Your body will recognize the benefit of having the alien thing strapped to your face, and accept it! it does take a while, but you have to be persistent. Think about guiding a big ship into a narrow harbor - you take it one step at a time. The first thing is to get familiar with the controls and how your ship responds to those controls in particular sailing conditions. Of course, you also slow down. Hopefully the narrow harbor entrance is not your first attempt at controlling the ship!

I suggest you look for posts by RobySue (although we haven't seen her on the forum for a few months) and Pugsy - they are full of good advice that you might find helpful

Good luck, and don't be afraid to ask questions. The only "dumb" question is the one that didn't get asked.

[Madalot]

I am going to cross my fingers and toes that the full face mask makes it much easier for you.

I started out on a nasal mask and was giving up after three days. I simply could NOT deal with the air being pushed into my nose only. Once I was switched to a full face mask, the adjustment process began in earnest. For me, having both my nose and mouth covered made it more like an oxygen mask. It wasn't as overpowering for me as it was just having my nose covered.

One thing I did that helped a lot was to mask up, on the machine, but NOT try to sleep right away, thus giving me a little more time to adjust without the stress of trying to fall asleep. I would watch TV, on the machine, for an hour or so before trying to sleep with it.

I will keep you in good thoughts that the full face mask makes it better for you and allows you to adjust and use the machine.

There are a lot of good people here that can, and will, help you through this.

[JamesW6175]

Keep on trying, your body will get use to the mask. I have the same equipment, with the exception of a full face mask. The EPR on my machine is turned off. Work with your Doctor and your DME to make sure you have the correct equipment that you feel comfortable with & that fits. I have had my equipment since October of 2012 and it has taken time to get use to wearing it each night. I am feeling better and starting to miss my afternoon naps. I have had some issues with colds, sinus draining and a bloody nose. All this will pass, we learn to live with this condition.

[RestedRebel]

It's been a few weeks since I posted here. I tried using the CPAP for a few nights but just couldn't get use to it. So i gave up, after only 4 nights. I then totally changed my diet and started going back to the gym. I have lost about 20 lbs so far. Thought I was doing great. Tried to go to bed last night and all I can think about is suffocating in my sleep. I was fine the night before. It's 6:45 a.m. here and I just tried again. As soon as I felt myself drift off those thoughts came back. I am so scared right now and don't know what to do. My chest feels all tight and I just want to scream or cry. Why is this happenning to me.

Perhaps you are suffering from anxiety. If I were you, I'd talk to my family doctor about it and have him prescribe you something for anxiety so that you can not only tolerate the machine, but get some restoring sleep. Last night I slept a full 12 hours on my machine, and, yes, I do find that I sleep better when I take something for my anxiety. First of all, it helps me sleep like a baby, and secondly, if I'm getting tons of pressure because I've rolled onto my back, I'm calm and relaxed, roll over to my side, and fall back to sleep in seconds.

[RandyJ]

It is unrealistic to expect that losing weight will cure your apnea. In my case, a 65 lb weight loss decreased my pressure need from 14cm to 10.5cm, but everyone is different. As you may know, many slender people have apnea and use cpap. Keep going with your diet and weight loss though, it will help in other areas.

The full face mask will help you if you suffer from nasal blockage, and you may wish to turn off ramp, so that your starting pressure is not too low and you feel like you're not getting enough air.

Give it another try.

[Admiral_Schmidlap]

Hi,
I want to thank every one here for the words of encouragement and making me feel I am not alone. My mental attitude has improved somewhat from this morning as I have managed to get up and take a shower. I am headed off to my Doctor's office right now to see if some kind of anti anxiety medicine would be appropriate for me at this point. I have been very reluctant to try that type of medication but at I feel I am at a point where I need some additional help. I am also going to put the mask on later this afternoon while watching tv as so many of you have correctly suggested. I think alot of my anxiety is from a loss of control. I am so worried about losing control that I get car sick if I am not the one driving. Going to the gym and watching what I eat gives me some of that control back. Now i need to learn how to control my fear/anxiety over CPAP. Perhaps some medication will help with that.